I'm an 18M living in northeastern of Turkey, still living with parents.
I'm stuck between acquiring SN or use a gun to CTB.
Guns are easy to acquire in large cities either registered or unregistered, but there are no gun shops I know in city I live. There may be hunting shops that sell shotguns but this would take long time to find out and I don't have a hunter's license, I have to apply for hunter's license first before getting a shotgun, based on what I heard process is straightforward.
If I procure a shotgun it would be harder to hide from parents compared to SN.
SN can be bought online here, but it has driven attention as an engineer from a large defense company have CTB with this method, don't know if they ever had an account here but considering a small fraction of population can utilize English fluently, I'm guessing they went here.
Some companies may not sell chemicals if you are not a business operating in expected field like meat curing.
SN would make my parents suspicious, as chemicals are generally shipped with a different postal service company and they make you sign papers claiming postal service is not liable for any deaths caused by any unfavorable conditions affecting its stability etc. etc., don't know if they do this to meat curing salt.
Less favorable methods I could try:
- Alcohol overdose
Alcohol is very expensive in Turkey and hard to find in conservative neighborhoods, I have better possibility of dying by being beaten up for bringing drinks into a conservative area than overconsuming it. I'd rather want my booze taste good too, because of bad economic situation I'm in I can only hoard cheap drinks which will just taste straight up like industrial solvents, taste of harsh raw alcohol than a pleasant drink.
- Drug abuse
Very bad choice, have never taken before them and laws prohibit it, I want to end my suffering while abiding laws
- Suicide by train
There's a small train operation here, jumping on front of it may work,
- Jumping from high:
When I was 6 I actually thought about this because parents were too religious they emphasized afterlife and stuff, I already knew world was too cruel from that age and I just wanted to jump from window and get into heaven. I didn't do this though.
I'm stuck between acquiring SN or use a gun to CTB.
Guns are easy to acquire in large cities either registered or unregistered, but there are no gun shops I know in city I live. There may be hunting shops that sell shotguns but this would take long time to find out and I don't have a hunter's license, I have to apply for hunter's license first before getting a shotgun, based on what I heard process is straightforward.
If I procure a shotgun it would be harder to hide from parents compared to SN.
SN can be bought online here, but it has driven attention as an engineer from a large defense company have CTB with this method, don't know if they ever had an account here but considering a small fraction of population can utilize English fluently, I'm guessing they went here.
Some companies may not sell chemicals if you are not a business operating in expected field like meat curing.
SN would make my parents suspicious, as chemicals are generally shipped with a different postal service company and they make you sign papers claiming postal service is not liable for any deaths caused by any unfavorable conditions affecting its stability etc. etc., don't know if they do this to meat curing salt.
Less favorable methods I could try:
- Alcohol overdose
Alcohol is very expensive in Turkey and hard to find in conservative neighborhoods, I have better possibility of dying by being beaten up for bringing drinks into a conservative area than overconsuming it. I'd rather want my booze taste good too, because of bad economic situation I'm in I can only hoard cheap drinks which will just taste straight up like industrial solvents, taste of harsh raw alcohol than a pleasant drink.
- Drug abuse
Very bad choice, have never taken before them and laws prohibit it, I want to end my suffering while abiding laws
- Suicide by train
There's a small train operation here, jumping on front of it may work,
- Jumping from high:
When I was 6 I actually thought about this because parents were too religious they emphasized afterlife and stuff, I already knew world was too cruel from that age and I just wanted to jump from window and get into heaven. I didn't do this though.
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