• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
936
I was shopping for groceries today and it suddenly hit me how ridiculous the whole experience was.
Here I am wanting to die so very badly and at the same time shopping for food which will by association prolong my life.
I made me wonder what every day tasks everyone performs that feels really pointless and anti-productive to CTB'ing.

3ohjV0MRFCJORyUQec
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: 4am, Forever Sleep, Passersby and 4 others
Nothing………………….

Nothing………………….

Member
Apr 23, 2023
53
Breathing Is pretty anti productI've to ctb'ing
 
  • Like
  • Yay!
Reactions: 4am, Ondine0000ff, Sleeper System and 1 other person
annointed_towers

annointed_towers

I’ll cross my heart, I’ll hope to die
Dec 9, 2022
335
I feel this about showering. Doesn't help that I hate being wet
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Passersby, Ondine0000ff and Sleeper System
sanction

sanction

sanctioned
Mar 15, 2019
708
I was shopping for groceries today and it suddenly hit me how ridiculous the whole experience was.
Here I am wanting to die so very badly and at the same time shopping for food which will by association prolong my life.
I made me wonder what every day tasks everyone performs that feels really pointless and anti-productive to CTB'ing.

View attachment 124981
I feel this type of feeling all the time. Buy groceries, bring it back home, organize it, cook it, clear the trash after, then shit it back out. Just to be hungry again in a few hours, and do it all over again..... and again.....
 
  • Like
Reactions: Painfu.Ll.suffering, Passersby, Ondine0000ff and 3 others
Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
936
Everything I do feels like this. Waking up in the morning. Brushing my teeth. Driving to work. Eating. Cleaning. Etc. It's sad living like this.
 
  • Like
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: breezeboy, Inactivezzz, Ondine0000ff and 2 others
TapeMachine

TapeMachine

perpetually confused
Jan 12, 2023
410
I feel you. Lol. I take specific supplements religiously... Ha.

I guess my reasoning is that I'd like my mind and body to feel as comfortable as possible while I'm still hanging around, ya know? I don't know if the shit helps, but maybe it does? All I know is I certainly don't want to make myself suffer *more*. 🤷‍♀️
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ondine0000ff and LifeCouldBeADream
MatrixPrisoner

MatrixPrisoner

Enlightened
Jul 8, 2023
1,831
There's actually some wierd ass people that think that what you just described is a good life...and these people give birth so that they can be responsible for introducing other humans to this "good" life.
 
Last edited:
  • Love
Reactions: Inactivezzz
Ondine0000ff

Ondine0000ff

Water and Dirt
Aug 19, 2023
90
I was shopping for groceries today and it suddenly hit me how ridiculous the whole experience was.
Here I am wanting to die so very badly and at the same time shopping for food which will by association prolong my life.
I made me wonder what every day tasks everyone performs that feels really pointless and anti-productive to CTB'ing.

View attachment 124981
Cleaning the dishes. It's the most annoying one for me cause it just piles up so fast it's so frustrating
 
  • Like
Reactions: Painfu.Ll.suffering
Nothing………………….

Nothing………………….

Member
Apr 23, 2023
53
There's actual some wierd ass people that think that what you just described is a good life...and theee people give birth so that they can be responsible for introducing other humans to this "good" life.
I think what they described sounds like an amazing life, I love eating.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MatrixPrisoner
Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
936
Cleaning the dishes. It's the most annoying one for me cause it just piles up so fast it's so frustrating
Paper plates and cups bro. I don't wash dishes. That would probably depress me even more.
 
  • Like
  • Yay!
Reactions: Painfu.Ll.suffering and MatrixPrisoner
Ondine0000ff

Ondine0000ff

Water and Dirt
Aug 19, 2023
90
Paper plates and cups bro. I don't wash dishes. That would probably depress me even more.

Wait that's actually quite clever! But isn't it a lot of money in the trash? I don't pay for my water so idk I feel like I'd save more money by doing the dishes
 
Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
936
Wait that's actually quite clever! But isn't it a lot of money in the trash? I don't pay for my water so idk I feel like I'd save more money by doing the dishes
I buy a pack of 50 that can last me a whole month for less than the cost of a pack of cigarettes. My time and sanity mean more to me than a few bucks. Everything having to do with human is wasteful. We spend tons of money on food and just shit it out. You can't win. And the world is set up to anticapate our wastefulness IE garbage collection etc. I dont care.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ondine0000ff
Lookoutbelow

Lookoutbelow

Jump to it
Sep 14, 2023
512
I was shopping for groceries today and it suddenly hit me how ridiculous the whole experience was.
Here I am wanting to die so very badly and at the same time shopping for food which will by association prolong my life.
I made me wonder what every day tasks everyone performs that feels really pointless and anti-productive to CTB'ing.

View attachment 124981
Before wanting to commit suicide I went about my pointless activities of daily living. After deciding to commit suicide I go about my pointless activities of daily living.
 
  • Like
Reactions: TapeMachine and MatrixPrisoner
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
47,145
I find anything like eating to be such a chore personally, basically all that existing is, is just a process of trying to fufill needs so that one doesn't suffer even more. I see it as such a curse to exist as a conscious being trapped in this flesh prison that we are slaves to that's destined for nothing but to decay. Existing undeniably is so pointless, it's just a futile process of waiting to die where inevitably all we know will eventually be forgotten about as by that point we simply won't exist.
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
14,643
True. It becomes hard to do lots of things when CTB is your main goal. I do actually still enjoy eating, so food shopping doesn't feel so pointless to me. I was supposed to be tidying the place today though and- that hasn't happened. Even worse- I need to start job hunting soon. My CTB relies on my Dad going first. So yeah- it's ridiculous. I'm just reluctantly going through the motions until I reach a time I don't have to.
 

Similar threads

GlowingStatic
Replies
0
Views
122
Suicide Discussion
GlowingStatic
GlowingStatic
Unsure and Useless
Replies
2
Views
218
Suicide Discussion
Scythe
S
praythestars
Replies
0
Views
198
Suicide Discussion
praythestars
praythestars