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Hopelessness2022

Member
Oct 20, 2021
37
For the past 3 weeks I've been contemplating suicide. I've been having severe depression, anxiety, and paranoia. I was diagnosed 10 years ago with bipolar and was on medication for a few months, but stopped taking it a few months after I was diagnosed. I fear that my mental illness will eventually win no matter how much help I get. It's got to the point where I've purchased SN. I feel like I would be at peace if I didn't feel like this but nervous to leave my loved ones behind. I know we all eventually die, but idk how much longer I can go on feeling like this everyday.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,571
It sounds like you are going through a lot. It is perfectly understandable wanting to exit when you are constantly suffering. It can be awful to be in a hopeless situation. As humans we have our limits and there is so only so much we can take after all. I wish you the best with your plans. I hope you find peace.
 
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H

Hopelessness2022

Member
Oct 20, 2021
37
It sounds like you are going through a lot. It is perfectly understandable wanting to exit when you are constantly suffering. It can be awful to be in a hopeless situation. As humans we have our limits and there is so only so much we can take after all. I wish you the best with your plans. I hope you find peace.
I just hope that death will be peaceful and no so painful
 
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Reactions: SadVegan, patheticpartner and Dead Meat
Dot

Dot

Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
3,252
For the past 3 weeks I've been contemplating suicide. I've been having severe depression, anxiety, and paranoia. I was diagnosed 10 years ago with bipolar and was on medication for a few months, but stopped taking it a few months after I was diagnosed. I fear that my mental illness will eventually win no matter how much help I get. It's got to the point where I've purchased SN. I feel like I would be at peace if I didn't feel like this but nervous to leave my loved ones behind. I know we all eventually die, but idk how much longer I can go on feeling like this everyday.
If nt mind askin why stop medication. If fear illness win sound like nt wan2 ctb...
 
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Hopelessness2022

Member
Oct 20, 2021
37
If nt mind askin why stop medication. If fear illness win sound like nt wan2 ctb...
Could you rephrase your statement?
 
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Dot

Dot

Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
3,252
Could you rephrase your statement?
Yh brain nt work great. U say stopped meds - how come. Phrase fear tht mental illness cld win sound like nt wan2 die. Any chance meds cld help
 
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Lone_Gray_Wolf

Lone_Gray_Wolf

Fate plays chess with 2 queens
Aug 21, 2020
263
I remember that phase, only I did not endured 10 years for contemplation to appear, it only took 1 and a half year. The hope for greatness, the worries of what is left behind, fear of "losing the battle" to eventually recover or give up to it. Is not an easy process but to me, sounds like if you are afraid of it, means you still can be saved; perhaps it would require a very intricate way but still possible... Either way, and whatever option you choose

I wish you good luck.
 
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Hopelessness2022

Member
Oct 20, 2021
37
I remember that phase, only I did not endured 10 years for contemplation to appear, it only took 1 and a half year. The hope for greatness, the worries of what is left behind, fear of "losing the battle" to eventually recover or give up to it. Is not an easy process but to me, sounds like if you are afraid of it, means you still can be saved; perhaps it would require a very intricate way but still possible... Either way, and whatever option you choose

I wish you good luck.
It's hard to live day to day with this and I feel like my only escape is through death.
 
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Reactions: Journeytoletgo and patheticpartner
B

Beeper

Experienced
Sep 28, 2021
227
For the past 3 weeks I've been contemplating suicide. I've been having severe depression, anxiety, and paranoia. I was diagnosed 10 years ago with bipolar and was on medication for a few months, but stopped taking it a few months after I was diagnosed. I fear that my mental illness will eventually win no matter how much help I get. It's got to the point where I've purchased SN. I feel like I would be at peace if I didn't feel like this but nervous to leave my loved ones behind. I know we all eventually die, but idk how much longer I can go on feeling like this everyday.

You mentioned stopping medication after your initial diagnosis.

Have you considered speaking with a doctor about your current situation?

I am not advocating for any specific action. I simply share the same diagnosis and despair.
 
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Reactions: patheticpartner
H

Hopelessness2022

Member
Oct 20, 2021
37
You mentioned stopping medication after your initial diagnosis.

Have you considered speaking with a doctor about your current situation?

I am not advocating for any specific action. I simply share the same diagnosis and despair.
I have but I feel like medication or therapy won't help
 
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Reactions: checkedout and patheticpartner

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