Venting confused with myself

[kvalez]

i don't understand myself i like learning about death and about why people hate this world and society and why people want to ctb but sometimes i want to ctb too but idk why i enjoy my life most of the time but honestly i hate it, my mom is always annoying me and my dad i can't even tell him anything or asking him questions because he stresses out i just went through a break up and everything is going down hill i been reading peoples vents on here and i relate to a lot of them and understand them maybe im just ranting right know but honestly i like talking to my friends and family but i feel so lonely like no one with me just my grandma but she lives far far away and she barely has signal but if i do talk to her it will help not a lot probably with comfort and reassurance but all i want is someone to be by my side physically like to hug me or something idk i just need someone by my side