Venting College wouldn't have mattered. Truth is I would've ended up dropping out, still it would've been better to go

[ultrasharpy123456]

Me not going to college and me refusing to get a job when my family needed the money and we were poor is what caused all sorts of anger between us and what made me an emotional abuser. If I went to college perhaps they would've been happier. Granted I would keep failing and dropping out but at least they would be happy.

And if I just got those jobs they wanted me to get I would've had enough money to buy a shotgun. I would just have to hid but the problem is we were living in motel and I didn't have a car so that would've been harder to do. It's not like I'd need to live forever, just I needed to get enough money to get a shotgun.

 

[real person]

how were you even going to use a shotgun to CTB anyway? isn't the barrel to long?

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

how were you even going to use a shotgun to CTB anyway? isn't the barrel to long?

There's a certain way you aim it when you put on the ground.

 

[real person]

There's a certain way you aim it when you put on the ground.

wouldn't a hand gun be easier? that's what i was going to do but there were so complications. the hardest part is hoping you properly hit the brain stem otherwise the outcome can be really really bad