Discussion Change a Fundemental Part of Yourself?

[sserafim]

No lol

Me neither

 

[Labyrinth]

I'm addicted to porn and the blood vessels in my head are about to burst.

 

[wondering&wandering]

I kinda wish I was asexual, if thats even a thing in men with normal endocrine systems and reproductive health. From what I've seen so far, it tends to be more of a women thing than for men, and that partly might be due to anatomical differences. Idk that much about the female reproductive system - but as a guy, I think we kinda need(?) to 'flush out' semen from time to time. Thats different from the menstrual cycle in this context, because periods happen on their own, and doesnt require direct sexual stimulation. I say "need(?)" because theres correlational studies about ejaculation and prostate cancer, possibly implying a physical need for flushing. But regardless of that scientific validity (and prostate cancer can kill me if I'm not gonna do it myself), the body's need for it is still evidenced by strong, innate mental desires of it. I'm not entrenched in the nofap community, but I think guys in general go a bit nuts without ejaculations after some time. Also, extreme sexual repression (as shown in religion) could 'bust the dam' and backfire towards degeneracy.

I think you bring up some very interesting points as to why you'd want to be asexual. Some I've already thought about, but others I hadn't.

Life would be more simple if sexual desires didn't drag us around. It would seem there's something wonderful in being able to partake in sexual intimacy with a partner, but perhaps the price to pay to get to that point (if one can even get to that point) is too costly on the self and society as a whole.

I'd actually argue your religion example is slightly off. Yes, repression is a component, but I believe it has to do with power dynamics. Why does rape happen? Someone (who isn't necessarily sexually repressed [I guess you could say for the moment; but I'm assuming you mean a lifetime as I'm also assuming you're speaking of the Catholic church predominately]) finds themselves in a situation where they hold power over the other. In a similar fashion religious leaders may find themselves with that power over the victim. Otherwise, all incels and sexually repressed individuals would be committing more sexual crimes proportionate to the sexual repression. Well, they're not (I'd argue) because they don't hold the power to. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I think people pat themselves on the back too often for their own moral standing, while I think it's because they live in a culture conditioning them to stay within certain lines, while not holding the power to cross those lines without immediate repercussions (but if they have the power to avoid those immediate repercussions, you may see a spike in what we deem immoral behavior). I digress.

So theres a few lifestyle options. One is to be more of a hookup kind of guy that has meaningless, loveless sex. That only seems practical if 1) youre stupidly attractive (for guys at least), 2) you have an outgoing lifestyle and personality, and 3) money (if not stupidly good looking). But not only do I think that it leads to emptiness (or uncontrollable attachment) and possibly interpersonal (and even legal) drama, some part of me just finds a deep, philosophical 'ick' to it (if I did it too much, which isn't much to me). So another option would to be a normal fuckin person, and have meaningful relationships (which usually involves sex cuz oxytocin and pair-bonding and yadda yadda all that stuff).

So of the lifestyle options, which pertains to you? Or is it another option not listed?

But the rest of me doesn't seem that human, thus not compatible with sex in a human sense. I'm not autistic, but i think i'm a bit of a weirdo in the ways I think and try to interact. For example, I don't remember ever truly 'loving' someone, except for maybe birds (I did grow up with one). I guess I had relatively normal childhood circumstances, but idk if the way I mentally approached and perceived them were normal. Whatever the case, the results that manifested to this current day still kinda feels new at this point in my life. As of now, I actively try to avoid emotionally investing into others, like on a grand scale. It's part of my generally perfectionist, apprehensive, and overthinking nature that pervades more than just the subject of my long-ass essay here. I struggle to deal with non-100% situations in general, and probably quite a bit more than the average person. For interpersonal relations, it might partly be a self-perpetuating cycle. I go to school, participate in recreational sports a couple times per week, and might seem 'normal enough' on a surface level IRL...but I've yet to try and deeply learn about someone because of all the complications that I perceive. So whatever views of people I have tend to come from what I THINK people could be like, and the internet (its at a metaphorically safe distance, and you could learn deeper details about people, thus closer to learning what people are truly like deep down). That might further fuel social withdrawal, and repeat. Of course, these methods have lots of flaws, and at the very least I would want to balance it out with more IRL interactions. I'm relatively young so maybe SOME of whatever I said here will change, but only in the sense that I learn to understand, respect, and empathize with people better in general (as well as untangling what is still a really messy mind of mine). On the other hand, who knows if I can ever learn to TRULY love people that come into my social circle (I've had some rare indications/exceptions)...and that fuels the confusion and dilemmas that I have regarding the subject of sex. Maybe this puts me under the "aromantic" umbrella, or whatever other in-between umbrellas of the aroace spectrum and community. But part of it really is confusion (not the gay kind of confusion haha), so I might find out as I go I guess...

I think it's good you have some hope for you future in being able to form emotional attachments. Not saying they're easy, but I personally believe them to be worth it. You just have to know how to look, which I must admit is a skill one needs to acquire (one I am just now starting to acquire [I hope, lol]). And yes, humanity is all very confusing and unpredictable, which is why I find it a bit odd when people say "normies" as if they're all the same. If they're all the same, why haven't we figured out which buttons to press to get them to cooperate in a way that works for us? It's because these "normies" are unique individuals with their own unique perspectives; dreams & crushed dreams; joys & sufferings. Relationships is a tough game with countless rules and players, but it's one I think worth playing.

Anyways, it would be silly to gloss over another option - which is to live a reasonably healthy life, just wank off like most dudes do, and to just be voluntarily celibate to fit with my not-so-personable self. But what do I jack off to? I dont want it to be about girls or sexual material (like it is right now), because I think that itll keep me tethered towards desiring them, and that could spill over and cause issues IRL. And unfortunately we live in an age with it's own unique problems, like porn. Unlike drugs, it seems hard to quit cold turkey and truly detach from sexual hormones, urges, and sensations (because of what I said at the start). So that weakens walls of self-control, and things can spiral out of control in the context of porn usage (addictions like this tend to 'progress' in a bad way). It doesn't help that my life is not well-oiled machine of healthy outlets, so even though I have a hobby or two, they aren't enough to keep me from resorting to jacking off to relieve mental fatigue, stress, and whatever other negative states (especially with the help of explicit material). I guess I should try learning more about self-identified asexual men, and how they handle things. And I sure as hell need to get my own shit together enough to figure it out for myself too. I've never tried consistently jacking off to...nothing. Maybe my failure to do so are also fueled by the uncertainty of whether that's even possible...

These are other good, succinct observations. I think you've got the right idea. And yeah, porn is a killer. My soul has been knifed by it plenty of times. I've just recently cut the chain it held around my neck; though it longs to pull me back in. Again, I think you're thoughts are going the right way. Here's to hoping your actions do, too.

Thanks again for responding! And also, feel free to PM me if you'd like, too.

Physically I wish I could change my weight. I've been overweight my whole life and I'd like to know what it's like to be thinner. I feel like it would make me a little more confident in myself, but who knows maybe my confidence is just always gonna be low no matter what I look like.

Thanks for answering! Maybe you didn't intend to, but you (and all respondees) are making my day by replying and helping me think through things.

Weight is a good one (I think) to want to change. I'm actually really underweight, so it's a bit of the opposite for me. I'm sure finding a healthy weight would boost your confidence, although, you're right in saying you have to have confidence in yourself in the first place.

I don't know how extreme your self-esteem issues are, but for me, I have a lot of self-hate issues (and little confidence in myself), so I've been doing better as of late in showering myself with self-love. Find things you like about yourself and remind yourself of those things. Then you can start to find more confidence in yourself as you grow from those roots so to speak.

Mentally, I'm not sure what I'd like to change. There's so many things that I hate about myself like my obsessiveness, my need for control, my depressiveness, my lack of confidence, and the list just goes on and on. But if I had to choose one thing to change I guess I'd probably change my weak willed state. I feel like with a strong will I would be able to keep a job, friends, and just overall be able to maintain myself. I'd be able to commit to sticking with beauty and fitness regimens too which would be nice.

Hmm, yes. Self-control as I think of it. To be able to control my own will into doing productive and good things as opposed to drifting into doing unproductive and bad things. Try habit stacking perhaps. Come up with a good habit you might already have (I guess a simple start might be waking up at a certain time), and then doing something right after that (e.g. making bed, eating, exercising). That way the one "easy" habit (find one that's easy to you) will help initiate the other.

Thanks again, and take care of yourself out there in this wacky world of ours! And of course, feel free to PM if you'd like.

No thought needed. Sexuality. Life would be worth living.

Hmm, I agree sexuality can be a key part to our lives. Would you like to elaborate? No pressure, and if you'd rather just PM you can do so, too.

Regardless, thanks for the response, and I wish you peace!

Having a brain with the right amount of serotonin, no autism and body that has energy would be nice.

Hmm, that's tough not having enough serotonin. Yeah. I can see why anyone would want that. And of course the other two seem ideal as well.

I don't know if I have much advice/feedback, but hopefully you can find the right foods and sleep cycles for yourself to boost your energy.

I hope you find peace though!

God, everything. Probably my brain chemistry if I could only choose one, but everything

Yeah, I'm finding brain chemistry is a big component. That's a tough one to stabilize for sure, especially once out of whack.

Hopefully you find one thing about yourself you wouldn't want to change. Can you think of a thing or two you wouldn't change about yourself?

Anyway, I wish you well and swift peace in your endeavors!

 

[NewtoEarth]

That's an interesting mentality you have. Your real family as in other human beans or other beings? If you'd rather not talk about it though, no pressure.

Hope you're enjoying yourself here so far; it's a rough ride, but one I at least hope to enjoy.

The latter! No clue who/what, though. I suppose in a roundabout way I'm reinventing religion for myself oops!
I'm not always fond of the human race :/ It's a fun experience but I'd rather not be stuck like this for eternity! :P

It's a delusion, but it doesn't hurt anybody (except maybe myself sometimes,) so I'm content to humor it :) This is a rough ride, for sure! Need all the mental roundabouts I can find to get through it. It's fun here, for most of the time!

 

[wondering&wandering]

I'm addicted to porn and the blood vessels in my head are about to burst.

Are those two correlated? I can't tell if you were using a metaphor or whatever those things are called.

Also, porn is definitely an eater of the soul. I hope you find your way out of that addiction, and at least understand that there is a way out.

Wishing you recovery and peace!

The latter! No clue who/what, though. I suppose in a roundabout way I'm reinventing religion for myself oops!
I'm not always fond of the human race :/ It's a fun experience but I'd rather not be stuck like this for eternity! :P

Hmm, interesting for sure. Again, thanks for sharing your perspective. And yeah, despite being a part of the human race, I'm not a fan of them either, but I love them all the same. Perhaps I'm just a hopeless contrarian, lol.

It's a delusion, but it doesn't hurt anybody (except maybe myself sometimes,) so I'm content to humor it :) This is a rough ride, for sure! Need all the mental roundabouts I can find to get through it. It's fun here, for most of the time!

Also, at least you're having fun! :) If you'd ever like to talk more, I'd love to! And, of course, no pressure. Just wishing you well!

 

[BeeLoyal]

I don't know if it counts, but I'd change my genetic mutation which lets me have bad incurable vision. Would help me see a better future ahead.

 

[Labyrinth]

Are those two correlated? I can't tell if you were using a metaphor or whatever those things are called.

Also, porn is definitely an eater of the soul. I hope you find your way out of that addiction, and at least understand that there is a way out.

Wishing you recovery and peace!

Hmm, interesting for sure. Again, thanks for sharing your perspective. And yeah, despite being a part of the human race, I'm not a fan of them either, but I love them all the same. Perhaps I'm just a hopeless contrarian, lol.

Also, at least you're having fun! :) If you'd ever like to talk more, I'd love to! And, of course, no pressure. Just wishing you well!

They are correlated and I spoke literally. I'm definitely trying not to die from masturbating.

 

[wondering&wandering]

I don't know if it counts, but I'd change my genetic mutation which lets me have bad incurable vision. Would help me see a better future ahead.

Sure, that counts. That's an interesting choice. Would you mind elaborating why that'd help you see a better future?

Thanks for answering, and I wish you peace!

 

[Linda]

I wouldn't like the idea of being a normie and having to go through the motions. I consider normies to be mindless, brainwashed sheep who can't think for themselves. They're basically NPCs to me. I think that most normies are brainwashed and conditioned to go through the motions. I don't think that any of them would choose not to, as that's what society teaches them to strive towards. Most normies want to conform and do what everyone else does. I don't think that any of them would actively choose to rebel or go against the norm

There is one big advantage in being a sheep. In a world in which most people are sheep, it makes life easier.

I'm not a sheep, but I can see that being one is not all bad. The price I have to pay for doing things my own way is that life is, and always has been, much harder. I happen to be able to cope with that, but not everyone can. You too are paying a price for not being a sheep, and it is not clear that you are coping.

 

[wondering&wandering]

There is one big advantage in being a sheep. In a world in which most people are sheep, it makes life easier.

Hey Linda, sorry if I'm butting into your conversation with sserafim, but I just wanted to add/ask something (no worries if you'd rather not reply).

I just wanted to say that I agree with what you say when saying being a sheep is easier. However, I was wondering how you would define a sheep (of course, in the context of this conversation). Also, how would you define normie (if it's even a word you use)?

I'm not a sheep, but I can see that being one is not all bad. The price I have to pay for doing things my own way is that life is, and always has been, much harder. I happen to be able to cope with that, but not everyone can. You too are paying a price for not being a sheep, and it is not clear that you are coping.

I'd also agree with this sentiment. Out of curiosity, for you personally what is harder in life for not being a sheep? (Again, no worries if you're not comfortable answering that). And how are you coping?

Regardless, I thank you for engaging with this discussion, and wish you well!

 

[Linda]

Hey Linda, sorry if I'm butting into your conversation with sserafim, but I just wanted to add/ask something (no worries if you'd rather not reply).

I just wanted to say that I agree with what you say when saying being a sheep is easier. However, I was wondering how you would define a sheep (of course, in the context of this conversation). Also, how would you define normie (if it's even a word you use)?

I'd also agree with this sentiment. Out of curiosity, for you personally what is harder in life for not being a sheep? (Again, no worries if you're not comfortable answering that). And how are you coping?

Regardless, I thank you for engaging with this discussion, and wish you well!

I'm using the word "sheep" to refer to the people who just seem able to "go with the flow" and do what everyone else does in life. That's not necessarily a bad thing. My husband is at least 50% a "sheep" by personality, but he's a great guy. (If he was 100% a sheep I would probably find him too boring to have chosen him as my partner.) I don't use the word "normie" - it's sserafim's word, and you will have to ask her how she defines it. There is probably a lot of overlap with my word "sheep", but sserafim is autistic and may not view the world in quite the same way I do.

People who are not "sheep" make their own way in life, and are not unduly influenced by what other people do. I think one expression is that they are "marching to a different drummer" than the majority. It isn't an explicit choice (at least, not in my case), it's simply the way we are.

I don't want to go into those kinds of details about myself here, to preserve my privacy. My situation is unusual in many ways, and if I say much it would make me too easy to identify.

 

[wondering&wandering]

I'm using the word "sheep" to refer to the people who just seem able to "go with the flow" and do what everyone else does in life. That's not necessarily a bad thing. My husband is at least 50% a "sheep" by personality, but he's a great guy. (If he was 100% a sheep I would probably find him too boring to have chosen him as my partner.) I don't use the word "normie" - it's sserafim's word, and you will have to ask her how she defines it. There is probably a lot of overlap with my word "sheep", but sserafim is autistic and may not view the world in quite the same way I do.

Okay, that makes sense. Thanks!

People who are not "sheep" make their own way in life, and are not unduly influenced by what other poeple do. I think one expression is that they are "marching to a different drummer" than the majority. It isn't an explicit choice (at least, not in my case), it's simply the way we are.

So, one other question if you don't mind. I have three types of people in mind, and believe I can grasp a sharper understanding of "sheep" by allowing me to know to what degree these types of people would be considered "sheep."

Person 1: a people pleaser. They go out of their way to please people while doing and attempting to become whatever it is that will afford the love they crave from those around them as they derive self-worth from those people.

Person 2: a middle-class hard party line individual (doesn't matter which party of which country, but if it does seem to matter, then choose one you're most familiar with).

Person 3: they hate the world and the people they perceive to be sheeple. However, they know what it takes to survive and thrive in this game of life. They adapt; they claw; they climb. They play the game well.

If I happen to not make sense, or it seems too tedious a task, no worries. Just genuinly interested in having a better understanding (feel free to create your own "persons" if you think mine won't actually help explain; although, I feel like they would for me).

I don't want to go into those kinds of details about myself here, to preserve my privacy. My situation is unusual in many ways, and if I say much it would make me too easy to identify.

No worries. Just always interested in everyone's situation as each seems unique to me.

 

[ctbcat]

i'd... change my body, maybe? very shallow. but it's the response that requires the least thought right now, and i really do hate my body...

 

[wondering&wandering]

i'd... change my body, maybe? very shallow. but it's the response that requires the least thought right now, and i really do hate my body...

Hmm, I wouldn't say it's shallow at all. The desire to be comfortable within your own body in the way it's made and looks is very important.

I'm sad and sorry to hear you hate your body. I struggle with a lot of self-hate (not so much of my body, but I definitely don't love my body). A friend I made on here said it's important to start loving yourself somewhere, and then to remind yourself of that self-love. It might not be easy, but it's a start!

I love my eyes; dull and brown they may be, I get to use them to admire the sky and read books. And sometimes, I like trying to dialate my pupils in front of the mirror. That oddly enough cheers me up, lol.

How about you? You love any one part of your body?

Wishing you peace!

 

[Linda]

Okay, that makes sense. Thanks!

So, one other question if you don't mind. I have three types of people in mind, and believe I can grasp a sharper understanding of "sheep" by allowing me to know to what degree these types of people would be considered "sheep."

Person 1: a people pleaser. They go out of their way to please people while doing and attempting to become whatever it is that will afford the love they crave from those around them as they derive self-worth from those people.

Person 2: a middle-class hard party line individual (doesn't matter which party of which country, but if it does seem to matter, then choose one you're most familiar with).

Person 3: they hate the world and the people they perceive to be sheeple. However, they know what it takes to survive and thrive in this game of life. They adapt; they claw; they climb. They play the game well.

If I happen to not make sense, or it seems too tedious a task, no worries. Just genuinly interested in having a better understanding (feel free to create your own "persons" if you think mine won't actually help explain; although, I feel like they would for me).

No worries. Just always interested in everyone's situation as each seems unique to me.

Your persons 1 and 2 are not necessarily sheep, because you can't just take one character trait in isolation and reach that conclusion. You have to look at the whole. But they are quite likely to be. Person 3 is probably not a sheep. I can "play the game", and I have done it very successfully, and even ruthlessly on occasion. But I did it because I had to, not because it was really me, and even then I didn't play entirely by other people's rules. I stopped doing it as soon as I had made enough money.

 

[wondering&wandering]

Your persons 1 and 2 are not necessarily sheep, because you can't just take one character trait in isolation and reach that conclusion. You have to look at the whole. But they are quite likely to be. Person 3 is probably not a sheep. I can "play the game", and I have done it very successfully, and even ruthlessly on occasion. But I did it because I had to, not because it was really me, and even then I didn't play entirely by other people's rules. I stopped doing it as soon as I had made enough money.

Okay, I guess that makes sense. So, a sheep is a person who can go with the flow, but only involuntarily so? And it doesn't really matter what traits they have, just so long as looking at them as a whole you can see them going with the flow, right?

 

[sserafim]

And yes, humanity is all very confusing and unpredictable, which is why I find it a bit odd when people say "normies" as if they're all the same. If they're all the same, why haven't we figured out which buttons to press to get them to cooperate in a way that works for us? It's because these "normies" are unique individuals with their own unique perspectives; dreams & crushed dreams; joys & sufferings.

People are the same at the end of the day though. There's a reason why propaganda works. There's even something called the collective unconscious. I would say that people are cooperating in a way that works for us. Buttons have been pressed to get them to cooperate. Most people have the same motivations. They're selfish, greedy, materialistic, status driven, and motivated by money, and that's the reward they get. Just look at capitalism and American society. Everyone is a cog in the capitalist wheel to keep it running. No one is protesting or trying to change the system. People wageslave away and accept their fate.

 

[Linda]

People are the same at the end of the day though. There's a reason why propaganda works. There's even something called the collective unconscious. I would say that people are cooperating in a way that works for us. Buttons have been pressed to get them to cooperate. Most people have the same motivations. They're greedy, materialistic, status driven, and are motivated by money, and that's the reward they get. Just look at capitalism and American society. Everyone is a cog in the capitalist wheel to keep it running. No one is protesting or trying to change the system. People wageslave away and accept their fate.

"No one is protesting or trying to change the system.". You are mistaken. A lot of people are doing precisely that. You could be one of them.

 

[sserafim]

"No one is protesting or trying to change the system.". You are mistaken. A lot of people are doing precisely that. You could be one of them.

Wdym? I believe that unfortunately, change is unlikely because capitalism is such a fundamental part of and factor in society, and is such a well-established system. I guess the system hasn't been changed yet because it works.

 

[Linda]

Wdym? I believe that unfortunately, change is unlikely because capitalism is such a fundamental part of and factor in society, and is such a well-established system. I guess the system hasn't been changed yet because it works.

You are using the word "capitalism" as though it were a single, well-defined thing. I don't think it is. The system of capitalism in western industrial countries today has little in common with 19th century capitalism, which in turn has little in common with capitalism as practiced before the start of the industrial revolution (roughly 1750). So capitalism is changing all the time. I have seen substantial changes in the way it operates even since 1980. There is no reason why it can't be changed further, and made to serve the needs of the population better.

Capitalism also operates differently in different countries. Capitalism in America has little in common with the way capitalist enterprises operate in Norway, a country I know well because I lived there for several years.

At present, the driving force of capitalism is usually greed and materialism; materialism of a kind that I dislike. But it was not always so. (Even in my time, it was less so before 1980.) One of the big contributors to the mentality of early capitalism was religion - as was pointed out by Weber in his 1905 book Die protestantische Ethik und der Geist des Kapitalismus. (You can read it in English translation as The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism.)

Capitalism and greed are not synonymous. Greed existed long before capitalism. Greed was not (usually) a defining feature of earliest capitalism.

If you think being tied to a job that you have to do 40 hours a week is bad, try working in the fields for 12 hours a day, 6 or 7 days a week, as many people had to do before the industrial revolution. And that was just to get enough food to survive. Most people then had none of the material goods that today we take for granted. Most of those goods are a product of capitalism and the profit motive.

The big failing of American capitalism, and its worst excesses, are a consequence of the legal system. The law requires capitalist corporations to think only of the good of shareholders (except where there are other relevant laws, such as those concerning safety). That could be changed. It would be reasonable, and better, to require any capitalist enterprise to have some regard to the interests of all its stakeholders: shareholders, employees, suppliers, customers, and society at large. The best corporations are aware of that, often recognise that acting in that way is a recipe for long term success, and do try to think about the interests of people other than shareholders, but they are severely constrained by the legal requirement to put shareholders first.

I think you need to define more clearly just what it is about life today that you are objecting to. I might well agree with you. But I can't agree when you haven't formulated a clear position. Also, having worked within a capitalist enterprise for 20 years, I know that it is possible to make some changes to the system from within.

 

[sserafim]

"No one is protesting or trying to change the system.". You are mistaken. A lot of people are doing precisely that. You could be one of them.

How are they doing so, and where are they? I don't see them anywhere…

 

[slightoverlooked]

physically? mhmm i would want to be naturally at bmi 15. maybe change my nose a slightly bit and a lil bit fuller lips.

mentally....the thought of not being mentally ill kind of scares me for some reason idk why...it would mean that all the things that happened to me weren't serious and valid. i wish i wouldn't be chronically depressed bc it just has been making life harder. i think its okay that i turned out this way even if it kills me one day

 

[Linda]

How are they doing so, and where are they? I don't see them anywhere…

You don't see them because you are cooped up in your own tiny world. As I have said before, I think you need to get out into the broader world.

 

[sserafim]

You don't see them because you are cooped up in your own tiny world. As I have said before, I think you need to get out into the broader world.

I guess I'm locked up in my ivory tower

 

[wondering&wandering]

physically? mhmm i would want to be naturally at bmi 15. maybe change my nose a slightly bit and a lil bit fuller lips.

Okay, nice and honest responses. I hope it's not something you beat yourself up over.

mentally....the thought of not being mentally ill kind of scares me for some reason idk why...it would mean that all the things that happened to me weren't serious and valid. i wish i wouldn't be chronically depressed bc it just has been making life harder. i think its okay that i turned out this way even if it kills me one day

This is actually a really interesting response, so thanks for sharing! It's good you find a sort of contentment with the way you are. I hope you can find healthy ways to cope with your depression if you so desire.

Wishing you peace and wellness, and feel free to PM me if you ever would like to!

 

[slightoverlooked]

Okay, nice and honest responses. I hope it's not something you beat yourself up over.

I have an eating disorder so my weight always have been something I'm critical about. I dont think I will ever find my body pretty tbh :(( but it is what it is. but i have been more accepting about how my face looks like.

This is actually a really interesting response, so thanks for sharing! It's good you find a sort of contentment with the way you are. I hope you can find healthy ways to cope with your depression if you so desire.

Thank you! It has been easier than the last couple of years. I am still battling it and tbh I might suffer from it for my whole life but having good loving friends around me and working on myself has been changing my life bit by bit.

Wishing you peace and wellness, and feel free to PM me if you ever would like to!

Thank you I wish you the same

 

[Meteora]

I don't want to change my physical appearance.
But mentally I d change a lot. I d like to have less anxieties, more connection to myself, less of a mess in my thoughts, i d like to be able to do small talk, I d like to accept myself unconditionally......
and much more.

 

[wondering&wandering]

I have an eating disorder so my weight always have been something I'm critical about. I dont think I will ever find my body pretty tbh :(( but it is what it is. but i have been more accepting about how my face looks like.

I'm sad and sorry you feel that way. Although, I'm happy to know you're trying to accept a part of yourself. That's a good start, and I hope no one impedes your progress of self-love by hating on you. You seem a kind and lovely soul to me.

Thank you! It has been easier than the last couple of years. I am still battling it and tbh I might suffer from it for my whole life but having good loving friends around me and working on myself has been changing my life bit by bit.

Glad to hear you're making progress, especially with loving friends! I'm hoping to make progress too (hence the recovery side of the forum).

I don't want to change my physical appearance.
But mentally I d change a lot. I d like to have less anxieties, more connection to myself, less of a mess in my thoughts, i d like to be able to do small talk, I d like to accept myself unconditionally......
and much more.

Interesting. Glad you seem content with your physical appearance. I have so many anxieties, too. But, this forum has been helping me socialize me (if you count texting as socializing, lol).

Very admirable goals. I've found writing (both a diary and stories for fun) have helped me connect more with myself, understand social nuances, and fill my mind with clear ideas that I want to associate with. So, that's my little suggestion.

Whatever it is you do, keep on practicing to become the person you strive to be. I wish you well and peace! And if you happen to want to chat for whatever reason, feel free to PM me!

 

[wondering&wandering]

I guess I'm locked up in my ivory tower

Do you think you can leave that tower? Would you want to?

 

[sserafim]

Do you think you can leave that tower? Would you want to?

I think I could, but I don't want to because it keeps me safe. Isolation is my way of protecting myself from the world