Discussion Celebrate your small win!

[Forever Sleep]

Does anyone find themselves doing this? I guess, because I've become so reluctant to do anything. I can easily go near full days of procrastinating (when work allows.)

So, to combat this, I've taken to hugely congratulating myself on small wins in the hopes it will spur me on. Can't say it's working but:

You put yesterday's socks in the laundry basket! Yayyeeeeee!



What were your 'small wins' today? Give yourself a pat on the back here!

 

[GeminiButter]

Does anyone find themselves doing this? I guess, because I've become so reluctant to do anything. I can easily go near full days of procrastinating (when work allows.)

So, to combat this, I've taken to hugely congratulating myself on small wins in the hopes it will spur me on. Can't say it's working but:

You put yesterday's socks in the laundry basket! Yayyeeeeee!



What were your 'small wins' today? Give yourself a pat on the back here!

Well done!!!

I was literally in the middle of starting a new post on this because things are bleak and hype is good.

I just washed my hair for the first time in two weeks!!!

 

[SchizoGymnast]

I hired an organizer to help me get my boarding under control

 

[Forever Sleep]

I hired an organizer to help me get my boarding under control

That's a really good idea. I hope they are helpful.

 

[SchizoGymnast]

That's a really good idea. I hope they are helpful.

They are. The key is to establish a rapport. My organizer loved deep cleaning and I was fine sorting through things and throwing them out. Teamwork!

 

[Tumblewillow]

This has inspired me, I'm gonna get the dishes done

 

[derekWest]

Be alive 2month after my ctb attempt and be quite satisfy by my life (more important).

Have some hookcups.

 

[GeminiButter]

This has inspired me, I'm gonna get the dishes done

I managed to do several days worth of dishes this morning unexpectedly! I hope your dishes got done

 

[Tumblewillow]

I managed to do several days worth of dishes this morning unexpectedly! I hope your dishes got done

They did! Go us!

 

[CatLvr]

I managed to do several days worth of dishes this morning unexpectedly! I hope your dishes got done

Dishes seem to be a thing ... Lol ... I am off to the kitchen sink!!

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

Does anyone find themselves doing this? I guess, because I've become so reluctant to do anything. I can easily go near full days of procrastinating (when work allows.)

So, to combat this, I've taken to hugely congratulating myself on small wins in the hopes it will spur me on. Can't say it's working but:

You put yesterday's socks in the laundry basket! Yayyeeeeee!



What were your 'small wins' today? Give yourself a pat on the back here!

I hate to admit it but I had to call the cops on my ex because he won't leave my complex and is stalking me. I am proud for calling them but feel shame at the same time because of a warrant he has still I'm proud I was brave enough.

 

[BlueLock]

good job! Today I finally finished drying my sheets and made my bed, so no more sleeping on a bare mattress.

 

[GeminiButter]

I hate to admit it but I had to call the cops on my ex because he won't leave my complex and is stalking me. I am proud for calling them but feel shame at the same time because of a warrant he has still I'm proud I was brave enough.

Well done! This is not an easy thing to do ever and no one likes cops but you did what you had to do to keep yourself safe

Todays win: I ended up going out this afternoon with my dog and some other dogs we know from the park to a ridiculous charity dog show and then we had ice cream and walked home and it is the most socialising I have done and most hours spent out of the house in literally… months and I even managed to enjoy myself?! It was very unexpected but I'm glad I had a nice day for the first time in a long, long time

 

[CatLvr]

I hate to admit it but I had to call the cops on my ex because he won't leave my complex and is stalking me. I am proud for calling them but feel shame at the same time because of a warrant he has still I'm proud I was brave enough.

Good for you!! Life is hard enough without someone deliberately trying to make it worse for you. I know how hard that was for you -- btdt -- and felt an enormous amount of guilt and grief at the time. Over the years I have learned that not only was it the right thing to do for ME, it also helped him out, too. Granted, he didn't like what he had to go through, but it DID help him realize that I wasn't coming back and that he needed to find a way to go on, also.

Do not be ashamed. Or feel guilty. Or bad in any other way. You are stronger than you know, and you deserve better. Be blessed.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

Good for you!! Life is hard enough without someone deliberately trying to make it worse for you. I know how hard that was for you -- btdt -- and felt an enormous amount of guilt and grief at the time. Over the years I have learned that not only was it the right thing to do for ME, it also helped him out, too. Granted, he didn't like what he had to go through, but it DID help him realize that I wasn't coming back and that he needed to find a way to go on, also.

Do not be ashamed. Or feel guilty. Or bad in any other way. You are stronger than you know, and you deserve better. Be blessed.

Thank you so much your message has given me hope I have to call them again tho. He walked off awhile ago ima try keep an eye out for him and then call them I won't let this happen to me again he shouldn't be here it's private property. I know it's for the best and I wish him well but I can't help him now. It's hard to know if his here I wish I was brave enough to check as there is no point the police coming if he is gone his in and out all day and when I saw him this morning in a sleeping bag down there. Well what more can I say

I'm glad you over came it I know it's possible as this isn't the first time ive had to do this unfortunately.

Well done! This is not an easy thing to do ever and no one likes cops but you did what you had to do to keep yourself safe

Todays win: I ended up going out this afternoon with my dog and some other dogs we know from the park to a ridiculous charity dog show and then we had ice cream and walked home and it is the most socialising I have done and most hours spent out of the house in literally… months and I even managed to enjoy myself?! It was very unexpected but I'm glad I had a nice day for the first time in a long, long time

Your day sounds so nice I enjoyed reading that! And thank you for your message it means a lot. As you probably read I've to ring them again I wish this was over

Thank you so much your message has given me hope I have to call them again tho. He walked off awhile ago ima try keep an eye out for him and then call them I won't let this happen to me again he shouldn't be here it's private property. I know it's for the best and I wish him well but I can't help him now. It's hard to know if his here I wish I was brave enough to check as there is no point the police coming if he is gone his in and out all day and when I saw him this morning in a sleeping bag down there. Well what more can I say

I'm glad you over came it I know it's possible as this isn't the first time ive had to do this unfortunately.


Your day sounds so nice I enjoyed reading that! And thank you for your message it means a lot. As you probably read I've to ring them again I wish this was over

 

[Forever Sleep]

I hate to admit it but I had to call the cops on my ex because he won't leave my complex and is stalking me. I am proud for calling them but feel shame at the same time because of a warrant he has still I'm proud I was brave enough.

I can understand you felt bad but it sounds like it was necessary and, you did the right thing. I hope they make it clear to him to leave you alone. You should be proud. It must have been so difficult to choose, but then- he put you that awkward and likely frightened/ threatened position.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

I can understand you felt bad but it sounds like it was necessary and, you did the right thing. I hope they make it clear to him to leave you alone. You should be proud. It must have been so difficult to choose, but then- he put you that awkward and likely frightened/ threatened position.

I had to ring them again because when they first came he was gone to the store sigh I seen him on my way there I thought I'd be brave and safe. Now I'm waiting on them to come I'm worried still he will know it is me and the guards are going to be annoyed because I can't let this happen again..

Ps thanks for the message all the support I can get at the minute I need

 

[Forever Sleep]

I had to ring them again because when they first came he was gone to the store sigh I seen him on my way there I thought I'd be brave and safe. Now I'm waiting on them to come I'm worried still he will know it is me and the guards are going to be annoyed because I can't let this happen again..

Ps thanks for the message all the support I can get at the minute I need

Do you have a restraining order against him? Seems like he's heading in that direction. I'm sorry you are going through this. It must be frightening.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

Do you have a restraining order against him? Seems like he's heading in that direction. I'm sorry you are going through this. It must be frightening.

It's very frightening, I don't have one but the police said I've to go and get one tomorrow it's scary to think of as I know how this goes. I wish he would just leave me alone I wonder because of his warrant will he even get out. I mean how let a man who stabs another man and who is loitering in a apartment complex and stalking me. I mean what way is the law if he gets out. I feel bad and good all in one and the bad is fear of tomorrow. Thanks for taking the time to write what you did. Y'all here are the best!

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's very frightening, I don't have one but the police said I've to go and get one tomorrow it's scary to think of as I know how this goes. I wish he would just leave me alone I wonder because of his warrant will he even get out. I mean how let a man who stabs another man and who is loitering in a apartment complex and stalking me. I mean what way is the law if he gets out. I feel bad and good all in one and the bad is fear of tomorrow. Thanks for taking the time to write what you did. Y'all here are the best!

I think I'd be feeling the same in your position. You would hope the law would be there to protect us. Have they given you a number to call if you see him again?

Have you ever tried any domestic abuse or, specifically, stalking helplines or charities? I'm sure they must exist in multitudes. (Sadly.) But, I think talking to someone who deals with this more often and, likely knows the law might help. I feel like you need a plan that addresses all scenarios, so that you feel more in control.

 

[cececinderella]

I managed to stay at school for a full week without being absent once. I'm very truant haha

 

[CatLvr]

@TheDevilsAngel -- I don't recall exactly how many times it me calling and reporting him before he decided I wasn't worth the trouble. (I know it was more than 10, and less than 20. And I CAN tell you there were times I didn't call that I should have and didn't because I felt like such a burden to EVERYONE at the time.)

These are the things I CAN tell you, though:

1. Start a notebook. Every single time you see him, or he contacts you in one way or another, document it. Date, time, where, any conversation that was had, whether cops were called or not, report made or not. Everything.

2. Get a restraining order. If you don't have the money to hire an attorney, call the state Bar Association and ask about reduced fee/free legal services in your state/county.

3. Do not ever think you are a burden to the police officers who respond to your calls. I had an officer tell me one time (he had been on-duty more than once and been one of the responding officers to my call) this: Don't ever hesitate to call 911. This is my job and you are NOT a bother because I know you are trying to get away from this fella, not use us as a weapon just to do battle with him over and over and over. I would rather respond to a thousand calls to you calling for help than one call from your neighbors saying he has killed you.

4. Be strong, even when you think you can't do this one more second. The day will come when it will all be worth it.

You can do this. May the spirits keep you.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

I think I'd be feeling the same in your position. You would hope the law would be there to protect us. Have they given you a number to call if you see him again?

Have you ever tried any domestic abuse or, specifically, stalking helplines or charities? I'm sure they must exist in multitudes. (Sadly.) But, I think talking to someone who deals with this more often and, likely knows the law might help. I feel like you need a plan that addresses all scenarios, so that you feel more in control.

They said to call 999 but he is definitely in the police station for the night. It's tomorrow his paid and when he drinks his so dangerous. I actually just rang a place here for domestic abuse and they said tomorrow if I go I will get a protection order that's the beginning then go for a safety order. I wish just wish he wouldn't get out tomorrow I mean who really knows until tomorrow

I also think I need to feel more in control I've always had a problem with being in control of my own life. 33 years and finally I'm ready to try and be in control for once in my life

Sending hugs your way

@TheDevilsAngel -- I don't recall exactly how many times it me calling and reporting him before he decided I wasn't worth the trouble. (I know it was more than 10, and less than 20. And I CAN tell you there were times I didn't call that I should have and didn't because I felt like such a burden to EVERYONE at the time.)

These are the things I CAN tell you, though:

1. Start a notebook. Every single time you see him, or he contacts you in one way or another, document it. Date, time, where, any conversation that was had, whether cops were called or not, report made or not. Everything.

2. Get a restraining order. If you don't have the money to hire an attorney, call the state Bar Association and ask about reduced fee/free legal services in your state/county.

3. Do not ever think you are a burden to the police officers who respond to your calls. I had an officer tell me one time (he had been on-duty more than once and been one of the responding officers to my call) this: Don't ever hesitate to call 911. This is my job and you are NOT a bother because I know you are trying to get away from this fella, not use us as a weapon just to do battle with him over and over and over. I would rather respond to a thousand calls to you calling for help than one call from your neighbors saying he has killed you.

4. Be strong, even when you think you can't do this one more second. The day will come when it will all be worth it.

You can do this. May the spirits keep you.

Thank you for the advice I need to listen to you and everyone here. The protection order comes first here then the safely order it's basically a restraining order I need to do this tomorrow I'm hoping my best friend has the pics of when he beat me I remember asking him to save them just in case and looks like I need them now. I will be strong and go there tomorrow and get it. He will prolly get out but I don't know for sure. Like in a dream world he doesn't get out. I agree than I didn't ring them at times I thought he would leave but no and I wanna get a snap of his sleeping bag to prove his been sleeping down stairs in the complex I also need to contact the management of here and say there Is a homeless man sleeping down stairs. That's what the police told me to say. This is so stressful and I remember the hole process oh too well

Sending hugs and thanks again for that advice it really helps me