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joolfive

joolfive

New Member
Mar 21, 2023
4
Young, stupid and angry. That's all I am. If i ctb right now, I would hurt so many people. I would hurt my sister, I would hurt my girlfriend, I would hurt everyone around me. Yet, the only thought on my mind is doing it. I have all the things I need. I will check this post again in maybe 30-60 minutes. I do not know what I am going to do. I may ctb in the next 15 minutes. Maybe 2 hours. Maybe tomorrow, the next day. Maybe the next week. The next month. Year. Maybe I get better. But this is a cry for help. I am trapped. I am in stalemate. Help.
 
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Reactions: thewalkingdread, R_N and Hevn
H

Hevn

Experienced
Oct 5, 2023
269
You don't have to do this.
If young and angry - it might be worth focusing your energy on recovery.
 
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Reactions: thewalkingdread
R_N

R_N

-Memento Mori-
Dec 3, 2019
1,442
It is your call in the end. Hurting others is inevitable unfortunately as long as you have people in your life who want you there.

For me personally, I wouldn't want to be emotional when my time comes. I would like be as blank as possible. Just like I think reality is beneath all of our strong impulses that add flavor to existence.

Behind all the thoughts and needless suffering. Behind all attachments. Behind our torturing bodies we have to endure. Behind everything is just an empty world devoid of meaning.
 
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Reactions: thewalkingdread

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