Hi! Considering treatment, I always try to wing it off meds cuz I don't really feel like they are reality either, and I want the ability to analyze things in a certain way.
Anyways, carved my skin today it felt nice. Compulsions to carve out "impure chunks"
here's the kicker: I've been to the doctors so many times for different things, cancer, herpes, other serious conditions.
Completely "clean"
The best they can come up with is eczema or celiacs.
Still, feeling dirty and contaminated as I've been sexually traumatized so many times. Not to mention all the other trauma, but it's probably relevant.
I've pretty much lost all function either I'm thinking about my health or I'm depressed hurting myself rationing about the human condition.
It's no fun, throw in mood disorders/scza and potentially personality disorders with anxiety (at least that's the doctor's opinions) and you aren't in a good space in the wrong environment. Is anyone?
Anyways when I'm stable I work on hardware technology.
It should be mentioned that I tied my first noose
Anyways, carved my skin today it felt nice. Compulsions to carve out "impure chunks"
here's the kicker: I've been to the doctors so many times for different things, cancer, herpes, other serious conditions.
Completely "clean"
The best they can come up with is eczema or celiacs.
Still, feeling dirty and contaminated as I've been sexually traumatized so many times. Not to mention all the other trauma, but it's probably relevant.
I've pretty much lost all function either I'm thinking about my health or I'm depressed hurting myself rationing about the human condition.
It's no fun, throw in mood disorders/scza and potentially personality disorders with anxiety (at least that's the doctor's opinions) and you aren't in a good space in the wrong environment. Is anyone?
Anyways when I'm stable I work on hardware technology.
It should be mentioned that I tied my first noose
