Hello,
First post here.
So two months ago I got a full time job. It's more a manual labor type of job and I don't make much at all (13 an hour after tax), I don't really like the work at all, and I work directly with a manager (which I also hate). I am really fucking struggling doing this type of work and it really is the reason I am on this website wondering if I should end my life now. I come home every single day completely out of energy and just feeling completely numb and tired. I've also been struggling with bipolar disorder for the past 6 years which is why I have never been able to hold a job in the first place.
I want to go back to college, but I feel like that's something I don't have the energy for anymore especially with a full time job. So I just feel like i'll be stuck here forever doing some shit that will make me sad all the time. I've really been having the feeling that I am at the end of my life and I am only 22 years old. I wanna work at a desk doing something STEM related, but I feel like I don't have the energy to bring myself there. My parents put a lot of pressure on me to pay bills and rent and keep this full time job and all I can think about is ending my life.
What should I do? Was anyone else in a similar situation and brought themselves out of it? I feel like finding another job right now would be impossible because I just go home exhausted every day. I am so sad.
First post here.
So two months ago I got a full time job. It's more a manual labor type of job and I don't make much at all (13 an hour after tax), I don't really like the work at all, and I work directly with a manager (which I also hate). I am really fucking struggling doing this type of work and it really is the reason I am on this website wondering if I should end my life now. I come home every single day completely out of energy and just feeling completely numb and tired. I've also been struggling with bipolar disorder for the past 6 years which is why I have never been able to hold a job in the first place.
I want to go back to college, but I feel like that's something I don't have the energy for anymore especially with a full time job. So I just feel like i'll be stuck here forever doing some shit that will make me sad all the time. I've really been having the feeling that I am at the end of my life and I am only 22 years old. I wanna work at a desk doing something STEM related, but I feel like I don't have the energy to bring myself there. My parents put a lot of pressure on me to pay bills and rent and keep this full time job and all I can think about is ending my life.
What should I do? Was anyone else in a similar situation and brought themselves out of it? I feel like finding another job right now would be impossible because I just go home exhausted every day. I am so sad.
