Can't cope anymore, please say something

[IWantToSleep]

I'm horribly anxious everyday to the point of dizziness, I binge drink every few days which is burdening my family and makes my anxiety much worse, feels like I never learn. I don't want to but I might end up in the ER today because of my anxiety, it's not like they do much but I don't know what else to do. I was going to wait until January of 2022 to ctb, I don't know why then, but I can't hold on until then. I'm worried I'll be so anxious I will be incapable of doing it. Doing embarrassing things or things I perceive to be pathetic are the worst for my anxiety.

My head is spinning.

Please say something.

 

[virtually_anybody]

Hello @IWantToSleep

I can only imagine how you must feel. A spinning head sounds like torture

would you like to talk?

 

[IWantToSleep]

Hello @IWantToSleep

I can only imagine how you must feel. A spinning head sounds like torture

would you like to talk?

I can't really hold a conversation at the moment, too anxious, but thanks very much, I appreciate it.

 

[motel rooms]

I don't want to but I might end up in the ER today because of my anxiety, it's not like they do much

What do they do?

 

[IWantToSleep]

What do they do?

Just get a psych to talk to me, maybe do something about my meds, but they're super strict with benzos here so they usually won't even give me something to calm me down, I don't know why I bother going, it's not a great help but sometimes I'm desperate for anything.

I think I might need to buy my ctb materials again, I had everything already but my anxiety made me worry that having them was making me more anxious which I know sounds funny. I threw them away and I guess my SI made me tell myself to try a few other things before ctb but the pain is so intense now I can't see myself doing that.

 

[Callie Arcale]

Living with anxiety is hell. I know that all too well because I've had it for 40 years.
My biggest fear is also that I'll do something really bad or embarassing during an episode of prolongued anxiety or during a panic attack.

I am so, so sorry you are in pain. I send you my warmest hugs and I hear you

 

[toforigivelife]

Just get a psych to talk to me, maybe do something about my meds, but they're super strict with benzos here so they usually won't even give me something to calm me down, I don't know why I bother going, it's not a great help but sometimes I'm desperate for anything.

I think I might need to buy my ctb materials again, I had everything already but my anxiety made me worry that having them was making me more anxious which I know sounds funny. I threw them away and I guess my SI made me tell myself to try a few other things before ctb but the pain is so intense now I can't see myself doing that.

Is the reluctance to prescribe benzos on the part of one doctor or have you seen more than one doctor and none of them will prescribe them?

If you had mild anxiety I would understand their point of view but given the severity of your anxiety it's unethical for them to not allow you to make your own decision as far as using benzos.

I mean, they do have the option of limiting how many benzos and the strength of the benzos as far as milligrams that they could offer.

If you can another doctor who will listen to how bad your anxiety is please do so.

In the meantime:

As far as over the counter remedies I know that allergy medicines like Benadryl (or Diphenhydramine), and other allergy medications, help with anxiety and that Dramamine can also be an excellent sedative.

You can combine both Benadryl and Dramamine in order to get a good sedative effect.

I know how you're feeling and that your completely overwhelmed right now but I hope that you can find it within yourself to go out and get those two products.

You may also want to add Ginger Tea to your list of over the counter remedies.

In addition you can try stuff like binaural beat music for anxiety and relaxation, you can find this music and the beats for free on YouTube.

I know it's summertime but maybe also take a warm shower or bath.

Put all of this together - Benadryl, Dramamine, tea, relaxing beats and music, a warm shower or bath - and you may find significant relief.

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I really am. I hope you find the relief and the right medical professional to help you with this.

It's sounds like they're waiting for you to self-harm and wind up in a psychiatric ward before they'll take your severe anxiety seriously. And that is shameful.

If your anxiety gets worse please go to the emergency room and tell them that you are having a severe panic or anxiety attack.

Hope you can find help.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry to hear you are suffering so much, anxiety really can be awful and debilitating. I wish you well.

 

[motel rooms]

Is the reluctance to prescribe benzos on the part of one doctor or have you seen more than one doctor and none of them will prescribe them?
If you had mild anxiety I would understand their point of view but given the severity of your anxiety it's unethical for them to not allow you to make your own decision as far as using benzos.
I mean, they do have the option of limiting how many benzos and the strength of the benzos as far as milligrams that they could offer.

I really don't get this. If people who suffer from severe anxiety aren't allowed to occasionally take a limited amount of benzos, who is? As if loads of other psychiatric meds aren't addictive...

 

[toforigivelife]

Just get a psych to talk to me, maybe do something about my meds, but they're super strict with benzos here so they usually won't even give me something to calm me down, I don't know why I bother going, it's not a great help but sometimes I'm desperate for anything.

I think I might need to buy my ctb materials again, I had everything already but my anxiety made me worry that having them was making me more anxious which I know sounds funny. I threw them away and I guess my SI made me tell myself to try a few other things before ctb but the pain is so intense now I can't see myself doing that.

Is the reluctance to prescribe benzos on the part of one doctor or have you seen more than one doctor and none of them will prescribe them?

If you had mild anxiety I would understand their point of view but given the severity of your anxiety it's unethical for them to not allow you to make your own decision as far as using benzos.

I mean, they do have the option of limiting how many benzos and the strength of the benzos as far as milligrams that they could offer.

If you can another doctor who will listen to how bad your anxiety is please do so.

In the meantime:

As far as over the counter remedies I know that allergy medicines like Benadryl (or Diphenhydramine), and other allergy medications, help with anxiety and that Dramamine can also be an excellent sedative.

You can combine both Benadryl and Dramamine in order to get a good sedative effect.

I know how you're feeling and that your completely overwhelmed right now but I hope that you can find it within yourself to go out and get those two products.

You may also want to add Ginger Tea to your list of over the counter remedies.

In addition you can try stuff like binaural beat music for anxiety and relaxation, you can find this music and the beats for free on YouTube.

I know it's summertime but maybe also take a warm shower or bath.

Put all of this together - Benadryl, Dramamine, tea, relaxing beats and music, a warm shower or bath - and you may find significant relief.

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I really am. I hope you find the relief and the right medical professional to help you with this.

It's sounds like they're waiting for you to self-harm and wind up in a psychiatric ward before they'll take your severe anxiety seriously. And that is shameful.

If your anxiety gets worse please go to the emergency room and tell them that you are having a severe panic or anxiety attack

Hope you can find help.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to double-post. I'm using an Android tablet right now.

I really don't get this. If people who suffer from severe anxiety aren't allowed to occasionally take a limited amount of benzos, who is? As if loads of other psychiatric meds aren't addictive...

Exactly.

I mean, what the fuck? They want to take away anything that the majority of people know how to use because some people can't handle it.

These decisions should be made on a case-by-case basis, not one having one rule apply to all.

 

[toforigivelife]

How are you doing?

 

[NoDream]

Have you tried Beta Blockers?

I can recommend Propanolol 40 mg morning and night. They are not addictive and lower your bloodpressure and heartbeats.

Better for anxiety than benzo.

 

[Alwaysbadtime]

Is the reluctance to prescribe benzos on the part of one doctor or have you seen more than one doctor and none of them will prescribe them?

If you had mild anxiety I would understand their point of view but given the severity of your anxiety it's unethical for them to not allow you to make your own decision as far as using benzos.

I mean, they do have the option of limiting how many benzos and the strength of the benzos as far as milligrams that they could offer.

If you can another doctor who will listen to how bad your anxiety is please do so.

In the meantime:

As far as over the counter remedies I know that allergy medicines like Benadryl (or Diphenhydramine), and other allergy medications, help with anxiety and that Dramamine can also be an excellent sedative.

You can combine both Benadryl and Dramamine in order to get a good sedative effect.

I know how you're feeling and that your completely overwhelmed right now but I hope that you can find it within yourself to go out and get those two products.

You may also want to add Ginger Tea to your list of over the counter remedies.

In addition you can try stuff like binaural beat music for anxiety and relaxation, you can find this music and the beats for free on YouTube.

I know it's summertime but maybe also take a warm shower or bath.

Put all of this together - Benadryl, Dramamine, tea, relaxing beats and music, a warm shower or bath - and you may find significant relief.

I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I really am. I hope you find the relief and the right medical professional to help you with this.

It's sounds like they're waiting for you to self-harm and wind up in a psychiatric ward before they'll take your severe anxiety seriously. And that is shameful.

If your anxiety gets worse please go to the emergency room and tell them that you are having a severe panic or anxiety attack.

Hope you can find help.

I too was refused benzos due to them being 'dangerous'. As if my anxiety and insomnia are not dangerous. Multiple health people refused me. Same clinic, but I called around and I think it's a popular disregard in the state I reside in. It's a pile of shit. I hate them.

 

[IWantToSleep]

How are you doing?

Thanks for asking, I live in Ireland by the way, the UK and here are apparently the worst for getting anything that works prescribed, I would've like to write a more coherent response to what you posted but I had to leave my elderly father who developed some form of late stage psychosis or dementia who just recently came out of the hospital to my other parents' house because while I don't think he should be alone, I don't know that I'd be helping him sticking around in my current state. So I drank to board the train, then had to take a bus, all in all a four hour journey, while I was at my father's I was desperately calling the out of hours doctors' service as it's the weekend, but ultimately I had to catch the train so it was alcohol instead of a talk from a GP and if I'm lucky 10mg of diazepam. I'm very appreciative of your suggestions by the way, I'll take them into consideration. Right now it's midnight here and I drank a bit to take the edge off, fully aware of the rollercoaster that tommorow will bring, but maybe I can try to minimise the anxiety I suffer from in the future even if it's still terrible. I could keep going, but it's already a wall of text, but thanks very much again.

I might keep this thread active, I don't know if making a crisis thread every week or two weeks is the best idea, I don't know. But it's great knowing I can come here and share how agitated I can become and not just be given the same old speech and a script for SSRI's endowed with magical powers and told to come back in six weeks.

I feel like my response doesn't reflect how bad today really was because I'm drunk right now.

 

[toforigivelife]

Thanks for asking, I live in Ireland by the way, the UK and here are apparently the worst for getting anything that works prescribed, I would've like to write a more coherent response to what you posted but I had to leave my elderly father who developed some form of late stage psychosis or dementia who just recently came out of the hospital to my other parents' house because while I don't think he should be alone, I don't know that I'd be helping him sticking around in my current state. So I drank to board the train, then had to take a bus, all in all a four hour journey, while I was at my father's I was desperately calling the out of hours doctors' service as it's the weekend, but ultimately I had to catch the train so it was alcohol instead of a talk from a GP and if I'm lucky 10mg of diazepam. I'm very appreciative of your suggestions by the way, I'll take them into consideration. Right now it's midnight here and I drank a bit to take the edge off, fully aware of the rollercoaster that tommorow will bring, but maybe I can try to minimise the anxiety I suffer from in the future even if it's still terrible. I could keep going, but it's already a wall of text, but thanks very much again.

I hope my suggestions help you. And I truly hope that you will find a doctor who can help you.

I don't know how much time you spend caring for your elderly, sick father but you may be suffering from caregiver burnout.

That is serious.

I hope you have let your doctor know that you are a depressed caregiver and now have severe anxiety. If you haven't, you should, caregiver burnout is isolating, it is hell and it can a toll on your mind and body.

If you're handling your father and you anxiety and depression by yourself that's going to be a tough road and it can cause a person very serious damage. Take it from one who has been there.

Like I said, I hope you find some relief and do your best to not go through caring for your father all by yourself.

I'm glad you found somewhere that he can stay while you're in crisis. At least you got a tiny bit of relief.

I'll be here wishing you all the best.

I hope you can keep reaching out for at least some support where your father is concerned.

 

[Risperdead]

Just get a psych to talk to me, maybe do something about my meds, but they're super strict with benzos here so they usually won't even give me something to calm me down, I don't know why I bother going, it's not a great help but sometimes I'm desperate for anything.

I think I might need to buy my ctb materials again, I had everything already but my anxiety made me worry that having them was making me more anxious which I know sounds funny. I threw them away and I guess my SI made me tell myself to try a few other things before ctb but the pain is so intense now I can't see myself doing that.

Try Cannabis for calm down ?! http://cbdcrew.org/cannabis-research-3/

 

[toforigivelife]

I too was refused benzos due to them being 'dangerous'. As if my anxiety and insomnia are not dangerous. Multiple health people refused me. Same clinic, but I called around and I think it's a popular disregard in the state I reside in. It's a pile of shit. I hate them.

I'm so sorry. Doctors are becoming less willing to prescribe them. It's not right. As I said in a previous post, these decisions should be made on a case-by-case basis, not as a blanket solution for everyone.

I don't know if you have health insurance and can have a serious talk with a primary care provider that your anxiety and insomnia have not improved with what this clinic is giving you.

Dark market benzos are just too damned expensive.

Benadryl and Dramamine can be helpful.

Have you tried listening to deep relaxation binaural beats or anything like that?

I'm so sorry for what you are going through.

 

[toforigivelife]

I'm horribly anxious everyday to the point of dizziness, I binge drink every few days which is burdening my family and makes my anxiety much worse, feels like I never learn. I don't want to but I might end up in the ER today because of my anxiety, it's not like they do much but I don't know what else to do. I was going to wait until January of 2022 to ctb, I don't know why then, but I can't hold on until then. I'm worried I'll be so anxious I will be incapable of doing it. Doing embarrassing things or things I perceive to be pathetic are the worst for my anxiety.

My head is spinning.

Please say something.

I'm sorry if I sounded like I was handing trite, simplistic advice.

Take a warm shower. I have to calm down after my shower because even that gives me sensory overload.

I wish there was more that I can do to help because I know what you're going through.

It's a shame that your doctor won't even give you a month's supply just so you can think clearly for a while. They might be willing to give you Buspirone. It's a non-benzo that treats anxiety. It's not valium but it might help.

(Benadryl and Dramamine can also be helpful, though. Maybe mix them with the Buspirone, might help.)

I hope things get better.