Can anyone tell me your psych ward experience after a failed cbt?

[butterfly🦋]

I'm wandering what it's like in the psych ward after a failed cbt attempt. How long did you have to stay? Was it a horrible experience?

 

[its-about-time]

Been in other times for suicidal ideation but all voluntary. The time I was in for a suicide attempt it was an involuntary admission - I was PISSED. I was so angry, I refused to talk. That gave them grounds to admit me involuntarily (I certainly did not want to go but wouldn't talk so they said they couldn't confirm that I wouldn't be a danger to myself if not admitted). Once in the ward I continued to stew and not talk for days. Didn't even say a word to the lawyer they sent me. The first step in involuntary here is "72 hour hold" but they don't count holidays or weekends in that so it somehow turned into a week. It might've been 5 days I'm not sure but I'm pretty sure it was 7. It was awful mostly just because of how angry I was - at myself and at everyone else. I'm still angry about it. I had previously sworn to myself I'd never go back to that place so that added to the anger. I don't think it was "unjust" or anything - they followed the laws and requirements of my state and let me go once the hold was up - I kind of fucked myself, might've been let go after the attempt if I had been willing to talk and lie about being safe. But yeah I hated every second of that hospitalization. I hate being in the psych ward period.

 

[butterfly🦋]

Been in other times for suicidal ideation but all voluntary. The time I was in for a suicide attempt it was an involuntary admission - I was PISSED. I was so angry, I refused to talk. That gave them grounds to admit me involuntarily (I certainly did not want to go but wouldn't talk so they said they couldn't confirm that I wouldn't be a danger to myself if not admitted). Once in the ward I continued to stew and not talk for days. Didn't even say a word to the lawyer they sent me. The first step in involuntary here is "72 hour hold" but they don't count holidays or weekends in that so it somehow turned into a week. It might've been 5 days I'm not sure but I'm pretty sure it was 7. It was awful mostly just because of how angry I was - at myself and at everyone else. I'm still angry about it. I had previously sworn to myself I'd never go back to that place so that added to the anger. I don't think it was "unjust" or anything - they followed the laws and requirements of my state and let me go once the hold was up - I kind of fucked myself, might've been let go after the attempt if I had been willing to talk and lie about being safe. But yeah I hated every second of that hospitalization. I hate being in the psych ward period.

Even though I don't plan to go to psych ward there is no way to be sure it won't happen. I just want to know what it would be like. You don't get to have a phone or any access to the internet right? Thank you

 

[Al Cappella]

It's happened to me twice, and frankly, I don't recommend. The first happened in the 90s in the U.S. (New York State). They didn't have room in a regular hospital psych ward, so they stuck me in a psych hospital that also housed those charged with rather serious criminal offences. It was literally like One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Most people had the shit drugged out of them. I woke up in a single-person cell, with literally a mattress on the floor and nothing else. I was there for I think 3 weeks.

The second time was in 2009, in Canada, west coast. Much different experience. It was a proper hospital, psych ward. Hospital bed. With that one I was really angry to have survived. Told the psych that, regardless of what he did I knew he couldn't keep me indefinitely, and that would simply do it again. In that place, once they had you stabilized, you could get permission to go out and to a store—the other place we were locked in. I was there for I think five weeks. Basically long enough for the antidepressants to kick in.

 

[MellowAvenue]

you could get permission to go out and to a store—the other place we were locked in.

Was the store also in the hospital? Kinda would like elaboration on this since I've never heard of a psych ward letting people out like that before. Sounds mildly interesting.

 

[Al Cappella]

Was the store also in the hospital? Kinda would like elaboration on this since I've never heard of a psych ward letting people out like that before. Sounds mildly interesting.

Nope, it was in the neighborhood. It took awhile before they would let certain patients do that. And then you had to tell someone where you were going and for how long. There were programs and meals, and you couldn't just take off. So you could go for a half hour for a walk, get junk food, etc. At first, however, you couldn't go anywhere. The psych had to be convinced that you wouldn't dive into traffic or something…

 

[MelancholyMagic]

I think a large part of it depends on your country, although each place has its own unique flavor of misery.

If you fail a ctb attempt and are caught, there is a good chance they will want to send you to the psych ward. From what I understand, you can elect to go voluntarily*, or they will involuntarily commit you. I would advise just going voluntarily - if you are involuntarily committed (which they will do), you can face a lot more interference in your life after you are released.

*Because the alternative is being forced to go, "voluntarily" committing yourself is sort of nonsense: you are forced either way. Still, voluntary has benefits over involuntary (e.g., they are more likely to force drug you if involuntary).

 

[butterfly🦋]

It's happened to me twice, and frankly, I don't recommend. The first happened in the 90s in the U.S. (New York State). They didn't have room in a regular hospital psych ward, so they stuck me in a psych hospital that also housed those charged with rather serious criminal offences. It was literally like One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Most people had the shit drugged out of them. I woke up in a single-person cell, with literally a mattress on the floor and nothing else. I was there for I think 3 weeks.

The second time was in 2009, in Canada, west coast. Much different experience. It was a proper hospital, psych ward. Hospital bed. With that one I was really angry to have survived. Told the psych that, regardless of what he did I knew he couldn't keep me indefinitely, and that would simply do it again. In that place, once they had you stabilized, you could get permission to go out and to a store—the other place we were locked in. I was there for I think five weeks. Basically long enough for the antidepressants to kick in.

Wow I hate that you had to stay there under those conditions for so long. Doesn't seem like a cool experience at all. Thank you

 

[Hate you]

I was sent 3 times as a teen, all were involuntary as a result of stupid OTC OD attempt and then 2 hanging attempts.

Was made to strip naked in a room to check for scars/bruises to prevent lawsuit? Not sure. Or was a recheck for contraband. Electronics weren't allowed and neither were drugs.

Wake up at around 6 a.m. to get vitals checked, (TV time), then go to breakfast. Psychiatrist time. Med time. Group therapy was just talking over eachother, arguing, the stupid "Self Improvement" worksheets. Lunch. Boring Gym time/Activity Therapy with limited resources, didn't even have energy to to anything anyway. (TV time). Dinner, food was nice but almost never ate. (TV time) Then came Phone time, to call or be called by relatives, parents wouldn't stop saying useless religious crap over the phone.... (More TV time) Night. Sleep meds if needed.

Go to bed and have a light flashed on you every 10 minutes to make sure you're still breathing. If you started to bother the staff they'd threaten to give you a shot.

Stayed 10 days on first attempt, 14 on second, and nearly a month on the third.
Same routine every day, every time.

Quality of care depends on your state/city i'm not sure

sorry for the disorganization

 

[butterfly🦋]

I think a large part of it depends on your country, although each place has its own unique flavor of misery.

If you fail a ctb attempt and are caught, there is a good chance they will want to send you to the psych ward. From what I understand, you can elect to go voluntarily*, or they will involuntarily commit you. I would advise just going voluntarily - if you are involuntarily committed (which they will do), you can face a lot more interference in your life after you are released.

*Because the alternative is being forced to go, "voluntarily" committing yourself is sort of nonsense: you are forced either way. Still, voluntary has benefits over involuntary (e.g., they are more likely to force drug you if involuntary).

I'm in the US and pretty sure your right.

 

[rationaltake]

Anyone in the UK?

 

[Lullaby]

The experience you have really depends on the hospital. Some are comfortable to be in, while others are pretty terrible.

My first hospitalization made me feel like some sort of inmate. They blot locked us in our rooms at night. It was really distressing and I couldn't sleep during my time there since I would hear some of the other patients screaming or talking to themselves at night. I also remember walking to the bathroom once and seeing this girl strapped to a bed, they just had the door completely open.

The whole experience was really jarring, especially since I was literally 12.

My last hospitalization was a few years ago and this place was much nicer. It was a campus filled with cabins/houses in a woodsy area. Staff was really amazing, so were the patients I met and the food was really great. It felt more welcoming like a retreat, rather than a place to scare you like the previous one I was in.

 

[butterfly🦋]

I was sent 3 times as a teen, all were involuntary as a result of stupid OTC OD attempt and then 2 hanging attempts.

Was made to strip naked in a room to check for scars/bruises to prevent lawsuit? Not sure. Or was a recheck for contraband. Electronics weren't allowed and neither were drugs.

Wake up at around 6 a.m. to get vitals checked, (TV time), then go to breakfast. Psychiatrist time. Med time. Group therapy was just talking over eachother, arguing, the stupid "Self Improvement" worksheets. Lunch. Boring Gym time/Activity Therapy with limited resources, didn't even have energy to to anything anyway. (TV time). Dinner, food was nice but almost never ate. (TV time) Then came Phone time, to call or be called by relatives, parents wouldn't stop saying useless religious crap over the phone.... (More TV time) Night. Sleep meds if needed.

Go to bed and have a light flashed on you every 10 minutes to make sure you're still breathing. If you started to bother the staff they'd threaten to give you a shot.

Stayed 10 days on first attempt, 14 on second, and nearly a month on the third.
Same routine every day, every time.

Quality of care depends on your state/city i'm not sure

sorry for the disorganization

Thank you

I was sent 3 times as a teen, all were involuntary as a result of stupid OTC OD attempt and then 2 hanging attempts.

Was made to strip naked in a room to check for scars/bruises to prevent lawsuit? Not sure. Or was a recheck for contraband. Electronics weren't allowed and neither were drugs.

Wake up at around 6 a.m. to get vitals checked, (TV time), then go to breakfast. Psychiatrist time. Med time. Group therapy was just talking over eachother, arguing, the stupid "Self Improvement" worksheets. Lunch. Boring Gym time/Activity Therapy with limited resources, didn't even have energy to to anything anyway. (TV time). Dinner, food was nice but almost never ate. (TV time) Then came Phone time, to call or be called by relatives, parents wouldn't stop saying useless religious crap over the phone.... (More TV time) Night. Sleep meds if needed.

Go to bed and have a light flashed on you every 10 minutes to make sure you're still breathing. If you started to bother the staff they'd threaten to give you a shot.

Stayed 10 days on first attempt, 14 on second, and nearly a month on the third.
Same routine every day, every time.

Quality of care depends on your state/city i'm not sure

sorry for the disorganization

Thank you this is very helpful. I think your locked up whether your a teen or adult. I've personally been on a 72 hour hold at a hospital that didn't have a psych ward. I just had to stay in the same room the entire time with security at the door. It was bad but could have been a lot worse.

 

[Shu]

It depends on what hospital you go to some of the hospitals are pretty dope. Of course not having Freedom sucks but some of the hospitals I've been to have really good food and really good snacks. Some of them have Netflix also. I can honestly say there was some stays that I enjoyed out of the 16+ times I've been. Some of them are absolutely terrible. Don't get the booty juice! Sigh pretty much gave a good explanation on how it works.

 

[butterfly🦋]

It depends on what hospital you go to some of the hospitals are pretty dope. Of course not having Freedom sucks but some of the hospitals I've been to have really good food and really good snacks. Some of them have Netflix also. I can honestly say there was some stays that I enjoyed out of the 16+ times I've been. Some of them are absolutely terrible. Don't get the boots juice!

Your right and some hospitals don't have psych wards so I guess if I needed to go to one they would have sent me somewhere else.

You have been 16+ times? Did you stay for long or short periods of time?

 

[Shu]

Your right and some hospitals don't have psych wards so I guess if I needed to go to one they would have sent me somewhere else.

You have been 16+ times? Did you stay for long or short periods of time?

Sorry when I said hospitals I was referring to psych wards. The maximum I would stay is for 2 weeks. I have stayed for three before a few times. Had I told them how I really felt I probably would have stayed longer but I would lie to them just to get out quicker.

 

[MementoMori81]

Anyone in the UK?

I'm in the UK and, as far as I'm aware, they don't stick you on psychiatric wards for suicide attempts, or telling people you're going to etc etc. I think a lot depends on your demeanour really.

In fact, after discussions with family and my closest friends regarding my desire for self deliverance, they made me agree that before I settled on that, I would have to try every means of recovery first. One of those entailed calling my GP, who, because of the certainty with which I expressed my suicidality and the fact that I assured I would be using a reliable method, he put me in touch with what is known as a "crisis team" at the local mental health hospital. I went, told them the full facts of my intentions, how I've been feeling over the last many years, the culmination of thoughts, the philosophical reasons I have as well. They noted it all down, a psychiatrist came up with a course of medication to start with, I was given appointments to commence with one of their psychologists/counsellors and that was it. They didn't lock me up, drug me, or do anything else. I just went home, and we went from there.

I think here in the U.K. that only tends to happen if you're a danger to others as well. For example, one guy I spoke to in there whilst I was waiting (I was there most of the day), who had been there on a residential for a while, not for the first time either, was there because he was a pyromaniac and attempted to burn his house down. So, he was in there receiving treatment, but even he sounded fine. In fact, they all did. By that I mean that none of them sounded like they were being drugged heavily or tied down etc etc. Though I'm sure it happens if they kick off and get aggressive.

He was actually quite funny. I had a four can pack of zero coke on me and he boldly asked if he could have one please? I gave him one and he disappeared, only to come back 10 minutes later, placed the can next to me and went "can I have one of the others, there's nothing in this one?" - I looked at it, it was unopened. I said "you didn't drink it" and he again insisted "yeah there's nothing in it" then picked it up and turned it around and went to me "see, no sugar, no caffeine, no artificial flavourings...there's nothing in it" at which point he just grinned at me. What a nice bloke. I wonder if he's still in there

 

[butterfly🦋]

Sorry when I said hospitals I was referring to psych wards. The maximum I would stay is for 2 weeks. I have stayed for three before a few times. Had I told them how I really felt I probably would have stayed longer but I would lie to them just to get out quicker.

I hate you had to go through all those psych ward stays. At least some of them were at nicer hospitals and you didn't stay for longer than a few weeks. I wish you the best.

 

[rationaltake]

I'm in the UK and, as far as I'm aware, they don't stick you on psychiatric wards for suicide attempts, or telling people you're going to etc etc. I think a lot depends on your demeanour really.

In fact, after discussions with family and my closest friends regarding my desire for self deliverance, they made me agree that before I settled on that, I would have to try every means of recovery first. One of those entailed calling my GP, who, because of the certainty with which I expressed my suicidality and the fact that I assured I would be using a reliable method, he put me in touch with what is known as a "crisis team" at the local mental health hospital. I went, told them the full facts of my intentions, how I've been feeling over the last many years, the culmination of thoughts, the philosophical reasons I have as well. They noted it all down, a psychiatrist came up with a course of medication to start with, I was given appointments to commence with one of their psychologists/counsellors and that was it. They didn't lock me up, drug me, or do anything else. I just went home, and we went from there.

I think here in the U.K. that only tends to happen if you're a danger to others as well. For example, one guy I spoke to in there whilst I was waiting (I was there most of the day), who had been there on a residential for a while, not for the first time either, was there because he was a pyromaniac and attempted to burn his house down. So, he was in there receiving treatment, but even he sounded fine. In fact, they all did.

He was actually quite funny. I had a four can pack of zero coke on me and he boldly asked if he could have one please? I gave him one and he disappeared, only to come back 10 minutes later, placed the can next to me and went "can I have one of the others, there's nothing in this one?" - I looked at it, it was unopened. I said "you didn't drink it" and he again insisted "yeah there's nothing in it" then picked it up and turned it around and went to me "see, no sugar, no caffeine, no artificial flavourings...there's nothing in it" at which point he just grinned at me. What a nice bloke. I wonder if he's still in there

Thanks. That's interesting. I'm guessing they're short of resources so don't want to section people. That bloke does sound nice.

I always worried I'd get sectioned if I was unfortunate enough to have a failed attempt.

 

[wait.what]

They blot locked us in our rooms at night.

I expect they did that to keep the more-fucked-up kids from hunting for sexxaytime partners after lights out. Adolescent units are bizarrely controlling with all kinds of strange bans. Some make sense when you explain them, others, not really.

As an example of a stupid ban, I gave my sister a tie-dyed shirt with a yin-yang symbol on it the Christmas she spent in what was essentially reform school. I found out later it was confiscated immediately as "drug related" or some ridiculous thing. Lao Tzu would beg to differ. She never got it back either, meaning someone on the staff stole it.

But yeah—adult units are almost always more comfortable than adolescent ones.

My experience in adult units run the gamut—from a nice place where people are genuinely trying to help, to something that was pretty much like the drunk tank in county jail. Only it was probably worse than the drunk tank, because county jail guards don't give a rat's ass if you complain. The staff at this hospital would verbally abuse you for it, and some threatened to retaliate. It was effing bizarre.

 

[butterfly🦋]

I'm in the UK and, as far as I'm aware, they don't stick you on psychiatric wards for suicide attempts, or telling people you're going to etc etc. I think a lot depends on your demeanour really.

In fact, after discussions with family and my closest friends regarding my desire for self deliverance, they made me agree that before I settled on that, I would have to try every means of recovery first. One of those entailed calling my GP, who, because of the certainty with which I expressed my suicidality and the fact that I assured I would be using a reliable method, he put me in touch with what is known as a "crisis team" at the local mental health hospital. I went, told them the full facts of my intentions, how I've been feeling over the last many years, the culmination of thoughts, the philosophical reasons I have as well. They noted it all down, a psychiatrist came up with a course of medication to start with, I was given appointments to commence with one of their psychologists/counsellors and that was it. They didn't lock me up, drug me, or do anything else. I just went home, and we went from there.

I think here in the U.K. that only tends to happen if you're a danger to others as well. For example, one guy I spoke to in there whilst I was waiting (I was there most of the day), who had been there on a residential for a while, not for the first time either, was there because he was a pyromaniac and attempted to burn his house down. So, he was in there receiving treatment, but even he sounded fine. In fact, they all did. By that I mean that none of them sounded like they were being drugged heavily or tied down etc etc. Though I'm sure it happens if they kick off and get aggressive.

He was actually quite funny. I had a four can pack of zero coke on me and he boldly asked if he could have one please? I gave him one and he disappeared, only to come back 10 minutes later, placed the can next to me and went "can I have one of the others, there's nothing in this one?" - I looked at it, it was unopened. I said "you didn't drink it" and he again insisted "yeah there's nothing in it" then picked it up and turned it around and went to me "see, no sugar, no caffeine, no artificial flavourings...there's nothing in it" at which point he just grinned at me. What a nice bloke. I wonder if he's still in there

Your right the UK is a lot different than the US. It depends on what state your in but most states put you in a psych ward from what I've heard. Good you didn't have to go to one.

 

[Lullaby]

I expect they did that to keep the more-fucked-up kids from hunting for sexxaytime partners after lights out. Adolescent units are bizarrely controlling with all kinds of strange bans. Some make sense when you explain them, others, not really.

As an example of a stupid ban, I gave my sister a tie-dyed shirt with a yin-yang symbol on it the Christmas she spent in what was essentially reform school. I found out later it was confiscated immediately as "drug related" or some ridiculous thing. Lao Tzu would beg to differ. She never got it back either, meaning someone on the staff stole it.

But yeah—adult units are almost always more comfortable than adolescent ones.

My experience in adult units run the gamut—from a nice place where people are genuinely trying to help, to something that was pretty much like the drunk tank in county jail. Only it was probably worse than the drunk tank, because county jail guards don't give a rat's ass if you complain. The staff at this hospital would verbally abuse you for it, and some threatened to retaliate. It was effing bizarre.

Yeah, you're most likely right.

It is sad to see some of these places with horrible staff. Too many working in the healthcare field, especially mental health, who don't care about the people they're supposed to be helping.

 

[MementoMori81]

Thanks. That's interesting. I'm guessing they're short of resources so don't want to section people. That bloke does sound nice.

I always worried I'd get sectioned if I was unfortunate enough to have a failed attempt.

He was a nice lad to be fair.

I think you're right, too. From what I've gathered over the last few years is that mental health services are seriously cash-strapped. You can go the private therapy route, as I did for a few years, but that was costing £65 an hour, I was going twice a week, so it's not really sustainable in the long run, if you want to be able to have any kind of life outside of therapy and the responsibilities of everything else.

I wouldn't worry yourself too much, to be honest. You shouldn't end up in one against your will, especially if your demeanour is calm, and non-confrontational and so on.

 

[butterfly🦋]

I think a large part of it depends on your country, although each place has its own unique flavor of misery.

If you fail a ctb attempt and are caught, there is a good chance they will want to send you to the psych ward. From what I understand, you can elect to go voluntarily*, or they will involuntarily commit you. I would advise just going voluntarily - if you are involuntarily committed (which they will do), you can face a lot more interference in your life after you are released.

*Because the alternative is being forced to go, "voluntarily" committing yourself is sort of nonsense: you are forced either way. Still, voluntary has benefits over involuntary (e.g., they are more likely to force drug you if involuntary).

Voluntarily seems the way to go if one fails an attempt for sure if that's an option. Thank you

 

[MementoMori81]

Your right the UK is a lot different than the US. It depends on what state your in but most states put you in a psych ward from what I've heard. Good you didn't have to go to one.

I had heard that about the US. I've heard some right stories from people on here - as an observer.

 

[butterfly🦋]

He was a nice lad to be fair.

I think you're right, too. From what I've gathered over the last few years is that mental health services are seriously cash-strapped. You can go the private therapy route, as I did for a few years, but that was costing £65 an hour, I was going twice a week, so it's not really sustainable in the long run, if you want to be able to have any kind of life outside of therapy and the responsibilities of everything else.

I wouldn't worry yourself too much, to be honest. You shouldn't end up in one against your will, especially if your demeanour is calm, and non-confrontational and so on.

Good to know. Thank you

 

[MellowAvenue]

Nope, it was in the neighborhood. It took awhile before they would let certain patients do that. And then you had to tell someone where you were going and for how long. There were programs and meals, and you couldn't just take off. So you could go for a half hour for a walk, get junk food, etc. At first, however, you couldn't go anywhere. The psych had to be convinced that you wouldn't dive into traffic or something…

Mind is kinda blown. Feel like more places should allow people who are making progress outside even with some form of supervision.

I thankfully had a more positive experience than most here have in my one, and hopefully only, time. Staff were nice and seemed to actually listen, offered advice that went a bit beyond generic pleasantries. I think timing helped. I was in the Psych Hall of a hospital when it wasn't even half full, there was a point where it was just me and one other girl they were attending to and I think the most that were in there were 5 or 6. This allowed the staff to actually focus on us more as individuals instead of giving conveyer belt style treatment. I guess some advice:

- Just try and stay cooperative. Even if you aren't clicking with them and it isn't helping you it'll go a lot faster and smoother if you keep your cool. Acting out, especially in an excessive manner, can land you somewhere worse.

- Try and find a time waster, preferably picking up an old hobby if you can. I played cards and read mostly during down time.

- If you see someone who seems personable, maybe try and talk to them. My last 2 days there I actually made a friend which made things go by quicker. You 2 don't have to besties or anything but fact is you're both stuck there temporarily so maybe if you find some company you'll both be helping each other out.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I've never been to a psych ward. I'm only interjecting in this thread because of some things that I just read in some of the above responses that may concern me. One has to do with a failed ctb attempt. If I do attempt ctb and fail, and either voluntarily or involuntarily, get placed into a psych ward, are they actually allowed to force medicate you simply for being suicidal? I don't have any other mental conditions. I'm in the US by the way.

And another thing, I thought I read that suicide has been decriminalized in the US. How can some action not be criminal and pose no harm to others, but simply by failing at it, it gets you committed to a psych ward for treatment? Makes no sense to me.

 

[butterfly🦋]

Mind is kinda blown. Feel like more places should allow people who are making progress outside even with some form of supervision.

I thankfully had a more positive experience than most here have in my one, and hopefully only, time. Staff were nice and seemed to actually listen, offered advice that went a bit beyond generic pleasantries. I think timing helped. I was in the Psych Hall of a hospital when it wasn't even half full, there was a point where it was just me and one other girl they were attending to and I think the most that were in there were 5 or 6. This allowed the staff to actually focus on us more as individuals instead of giving conveyer belt style treatment. I guess some advice:

- Just try and stay cooperative. Even if you aren't clicking with them and it isn't helping you it'll go a lot faster and smoother if you keep your cool. Acting out, especially in an excessive manner, can land you somewhere worse.

- Try and find a time waster, preferably picking up an old hobby if you can. I played cards and read mostly during down time.

- If you see someone who seems personable, maybe try and talk to them. My last 2 days there I actually made a friend which made things go by quicker. You 2 don't have to besties or anything but fact is you're both stuck there temporarily so maybe if you find some company you'll both be helping each other out.

Good advice. Thanks

 

[MellowAvenue]

If I do attempt ctb and fail, and either voluntarily or involuntarily, get placed into a psych ward, are they actually allowed to force medicate you simply for being suicidal?

So, it's kind of a tricky answer. If you go in voluntarily than that means they've technically deemed you in the right state of mind to make that decision which means that you should be in the right state of mind to agree to treatment, however by doing so you are also saying you want treatment, so if you refuse treatment after previously agreeing but were deemed a potential danger to yourself earlier I THINK a doctor can actually choose to forcibly medicate because you aren't getting better therefore still a danger to yourself. That said, if you were voluntary and it was your first time with no prior mental health issues dosage will likely be low unless you have a shitty doctor. Maybe try and tell the doctor that you think the counseling will help you more than medication, I don't know if they'll bite though.

And another thing, I thought I read that suicide has been decriminalized in the US. How can some action not be criminal and pose no harm to others, but simply by failing at it, it gets you committed to a psych ward for treatment? Makes no sense to me.

To my knowledge, being charged for attempting has always been incredibly rare, to the point where calling it illegal is a stretch even in states that still have their archaic laws on the book. It really is just because they don't want you dead, so they want to try and save you (whether right or wrong) out of some moral obligation or something. There are a few states that have legalized physician assisted suicide but that's mostly for the mentally ill or terminally ill I believe.