NSFW broke my hoover masturbating with it

[Zeus35]

Im a girl, and I heard of people masturbating with their hoovers. Anyway I was having a great time but it suddenly stopped working. I checked the air bag and emptied it, still not working. Its a Henry Hoover.

 

[jodes2]

Bloody hell, that must have been quite a session! Henry Hoover's are robust and powerful! Congratulations that sucks. Maybe it was on its way out anyway, it shouldn't have died

 

[Soulless Angel]

what the fuck have I just read?
Please tell me this isn't for real.... I don't know any more am I more drunk then I thought?

 

[Zeus35]

Bloody hell, that must have been quite a session! Henry Hoover's are robust and powerful! Congratulations that sucks. Maybe it was on its way out anyway, it shouldn't have died

yeah, I will have to buy a new one

 

[Zeus35]

what the fuck have I just read?
Please tell me this isn't for real.... I don't know any more am I more drunk then I thought?

yes, totally real. I just wanted to try it.

 

[Darkover]

i feel sorry for the vacuum poor thing

 

[Fwompje]

Very brave of you to post this, they couldn't torture this info out of me. Anyways, have you googled it? Here's a handy checklist.
...

 

[suprswag]

Holy hell, surprised you're brave enough to post this lmao
wouldn't ever share this if this were me, even on my deathbed

 

[Next-to-Nil]

I'm glad you had a great time! Sorry to hear about the vacuum

 

[Zeus35]

Very brave of you to post this, they couldn't torture this info out of me. Anyways, have you googled it? Here's a handy checklist.
...

I have had a look, thank you for the link x

i feel sorry for the vacuum poor thing

I'll invite you o Henry's funeral so that you can express ypur condolences to his widow Hetty

 

[jodes2]

i feel sorry for the vacuum poor thing

I'd love a death from excessively being used to masturbate a woman. Go Henry, you dirty thing he had a happy life. Even if a bit short.

 

[gum]

Whats a "hoover"? I'm gathering its a vacuum? And if that is true, out of morbid curiosity can I ask how exactly it works when it comes to that? Cause I can't think of how it would?

 

[Next-to-Nil]

Basically you use it for clitoral stimulation. Suction can feel good for women too.

 

[gum]

Basically you use it for clitoral stimulation. Suction can feel good for women too.

Ah, I see, ty

 

[DocNo]

if there would be a thread of the day award i would nominate this one ^^

 

[Afflicted]

When I first clicked on the title I was totally expecting this to be a dude posting this. Color me surprised to find out it's a chick. I knew girls got down with the shower head but the vacuum is a new one to me.

 

[Zeus35]

Whats a "hoover"? I'm gathering its a vacuum? And if that is true, out of morbid curiosity can I ask how exactly it works when it comes to that? Cause I can't think of how it would?

You use the suction part.

if there would be a thread of the day award i would nominate this one ^^

Thank you, I am glad I have made people laugh or alreast smile x

When I first clicked on the title I was totally expecting this to be a dude posting this. Color me surprised to find out it's a chick. I knew girls got down with the shower head but the vacuum is a new one to me.

Hamm I've never heard of the shower head one, but I better not try it encase I break the too. I have heard of men doing it but some how I expect a swolen penis.

 

[Abadoned_Me]

a... vacuum cleaner?
ive heard of shower heads.. but a vacuum cleaner?

 

[Zeus35]

a... vacuum cleaner?
ive heard of shower heads.. but a vacuum cleaner?

Yes, that's the strange thing, I've never heard of shows heads being used
The circled red part goes on your clitoris and vibrates when lifted slightly.

 

[DocNo]

You use the suction part.

Thank you, I am glad I have made people laugh or alreast smile x

Hamm I've never heard of the shower head one, but I better not try it encase I break the too. I have heard of men doing it but some how I expect a swolen penis.

i mean i totally understand why people like the henry hoover. for all people who didn't know it (including myself) and didnt google it, here's an image.



i mean - look at this cute naughty eyes - who can resist not to get sucked in by this thing. who needs sex robots when we can have henry hoover. :D

 

[Abadoned_Me]

Yes, that's the strange thing, I've never heard of shows heads being used
The circled red part goes on your clitoris and vibrates when lifted slightly.

i think people use those like
shower heads where u can change the pressure or something? idk

 

[Rogue Proxy]

Very brave of you to post this, they couldn't torture this info out of me.

Not even with sodium pentothal?

Oh, man! I just got an image of some hostage getting a big dose of truth serum, and divulging every graphic detail of their sexual escapades with a vacuum cleaner to their captor.

But seriously, no disrespect towards sex toy enthusiasts, object fetishists, or objectum sexuals.

 

[Zeus35]

Not even with sodium pentothal?

Oh, man! I just got an image of some hostage getting a big dose of truth serum, and divulging every graphic detail of their sexual escapades with a vacuum cleaner to their captor.

But seriously, no disrespect towards sex toy enthusiasts, object fetishists, or objectum sexuals.

I've never used an object before, it was my first time with the vacuum. Usually its a penis or a cucumber

 

[Rogue Proxy]

I've never used an object before, it was my first time with the vacuum. Usually its a penis or a cucumber

That reminds me of an independent sex toy business called SelfDelve. They make realistic fruit and vegetable dildos, including cucumbers. Good news is that they last a whole lot longer than real produce. Bad news is that they cost a fortune, and most aren't safe for anal.

 

[Zeus35]

That reminds me of an independent sex toy business called SelfDelve. They make realistic fruit and vegetable dildos, including cucumbers. Good news is that they last a whole lot longer than real produce. Bad news is that they cost a fortune, and most aren't safe for anal.

i use the real kind then bin it after use

 

[GasMonkey]

A girl called Zeus?

 

[DumbOnlineGirl]

TIL Henry hoover is a total fuckboy lmao

 

[anguila_anguila]

This was a great post - so unexpected! Like others, I figured this would be a guy doing this because I have never heard of a woman using a hoover before - head and shoulders bottles and vegetables, yes, but never vacuum cleaners!


What makes it slightly better is that in my similar threads recommendation, there is:


And this post puts them in a whole different light!

 

[Rogue Proxy]

This affair gives new meaning to the old jingle: "Hoover: Noooooooobodyyyyyyyyyyyyyy does it like yooooooooooooooou!"

Not to mention the first section of this song:

 

[DocNo]

This affair gives new meaning to the old jingle: "Hoover: Noooooooobodyyyyyyyyyyyyyy does it like yooooooooooooooou!"

Not to mention the first section of this song:

stop it! :D