Blessing in Disguise (not getting what you want)

[Snake of Eden]

Lately I been doing alot of pondering about what it means to get what you want. I been involved in a romantic relationship that didnt has the chance to blossom after life drifted us apart by chance two years ago and I was bitter about it ever since until few days ago when I happened to realise that I could never be successful at having fulfiling love life because of my many issues. After so many ruminations about what ifs and cursing the universe for depriving me from the chance at love, I came to be happy that we werent meant to be. The reason is as much as I feel we liked each other and could have been so compatible, the truth is I dont have what it takes to be in a good relationship. In other words I would have suffered immensely out of my inability to be successful in being romantic and a good partner because I wouldnt be able to give something that I dont have.

My desire for intimacy is still there but my new understanding of what it takes for relationships to work versus what I am realistically able to offer is a good mind opening epiphany that I just suck at relationships in general and intimacy and it is ok because it is not nearly my fault and something out of my control. I am genuinely happy it ended that way because ag least I still have the good memories from it as it didnt end in any jarring way that makes my mind try to suppress it.

Thank you R.S. for making me feel that I could be loved and that I deserve happiness even though I could never achieve that but you could see beneath my awkwardness and shortcomings enough to connect to my core as I connected with yours. I really wish you happiness for the rest of your life :)

 

[Iamchickenhat]

I recognize what you're saying but you were more profound and it hurts to make that realization, that something about you is just wrong at some basic level. But I feel this

 

[Snake of Eden]

I recognize what you're saying but you were more profound and it hurts to make that realization, that something about you is just wrong at some basic level. But I feel this

You are right it is painful but it is really ok because it is the truth and truth shall always set you free as painful as it is yet still the only way towards true liberation. It is essential to growth, peace and contentment to settle for ourselves no matter how we dislike what we are

 

[Iamchickenhat]

Aww. now I cried bc it's so true. I'm not there yet, but I hope to be