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ikadasui

ikadasui

Arcanist
May 29, 2018
464
I live my comfortable fleeting moments as if I were somebody else. Able to form bonds and be proud of my existence as a different entity and then it happens, I'm brought back to reality and any joy is replaced with disgust and anger. 24years of these thoughts and feelings that have only grown more debilitating as time goes on. I'm terrible at expressing myself and not very bright but it feels like I'm shackled in a cell that has no way out save for death
 
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Reactions: wiltingorchid, Skathon and niki wonoto
N

niki wonoto

Student
Oct 10, 2019
187
Imagination is always better & much more interesting than this shitty reality.
 
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Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Rogue Proxy, Darkover and 1 other person
leftdreaming

leftdreaming

I should’ve been a house cat
Apr 28, 2023
170
This one hit close to home. My dreams aren't even myself anymore, I'm not sure they ever were. Different name, different life. The only joy that comes from living is being able to dream. I feel you.
 
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ikadasui

ikadasui

Arcanist
May 29, 2018
464
This one hit close to home. My dreams aren't even myself anymore, I'm not sure they ever were. Different name, different life. The only joy that comes from living is being able to dream. I feel you
yeah it feels like I'm just a mural of other people's persona's mashed into one. Like yarn but each strand is someone else, and if I'm in there too I wouldn't even know which one I'd be anyway so I can't find myself. It's very exhausting and ever growing it's a true misery
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,730
Being trapped in a situation of endless suffering really is so horrible, I see existing as being an undeserved punishment.
 
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Reactions: ikadasui, myusername890 and Rogue Proxy