B
BlessedBeTheFlame
All things are nothing to me
- Feb 2, 2024
- 149
I fucking hate anyone like me. I know everyone hates people like me. Everyone everywhere always hates everyone like me. I've asked around LGT-spaces and they always want me gone. And in any regular "straight" space, people say the exact same things. I fucking belong nowhere and am just a worthless blemish on LGT-peoples existence. They vent their rightful and honest frustrations with me and people all buy into having to defend us subhuman scum and therefore make their lives even worse. People all buy into thinking we're somehow worthy of existing, yet deep down I know they want me gone. I hear them talk about how greedy, how two-faced, how manipulative, how selfish, how sex-obsessed, how undecisive we are, yet turn around and tell me to keep going at the next second. It's all because they don't feel allowed to criticize our existence, yet desperately want to. I know the truth and how it makes me a disgusting person. I wish I could take a knife and cut out enough of my brain, until I can be normal. I wish I could erase all of these thoughts forever. From anyone. A world without us would be such a better world for everyone. I just want my vile, disgusting disorder to ruin the existence of everyone else ever again. Because all of the things they say about me is always true. It's always true. Even if it wasn't, does it matter? If every single last person tells me to take a knife and cut my eyeballs out, then refusing to do it is selfish. If everyone wants me to do something and I refuse, I am selfish for putting myself before all of humanity. So if all of humanity hates me, I should kill myself and I stop complaining. Being alive is selfish. I don't face any problems or any adversities like LGT-people do in their lives whatsoever. Because I am this way, I am far more privileged than anyone in society and face no repercussions for my behavior. I don't deserve to think I'm allowed to have depression. I should feel like the scum of earth, but should never be allowed to acknowledge it in my life. I am a disgusting subhuman, a complete parasite, a disgrace upon society. All I deserve is torment and death. My disease should be wiped off the earth. I only want to die anymore. I have nothing. I have resolved to never get into a relationship. If I get into any relationship without telling people of my disgusting shit, I am no better than a rapist. And if I do tell them, they would surely want me gone and dead. I am simply a disgusting subhuman and deserve nothing in life. I should be punished for my transgression on society. I must die. I must die. I must die.