avoidant personality disorder =/

[ilvgore]

hey im feeling very very bad right now does somebody struggle with avpd and wants to talk about that?

 

[CravingPeace]

I don't have avpd but I can definitely talk about it with you if you'd like. How are you?

 

[ilvgore]

im not good i want to kill myself but cant do you know this feeling? i feel very very ashamed because i did a terrible mistake and it makes me very suicidal right now

 

[CravingPeace]

im not good i want to kill myself but cant do you know this feeling? i feel very very ashamed because i did a terrible mistake and it makes me very suicidal right now

I definitely know the feeling. I have it now. I have logically concluded that my life is unsalvageable, but I'm in a state of limbo of knowing I with CTB, but not having the courage to set a date.

 

[ilvgore]

i dont deserve none of your time
time will fix my feelings but lifes so stupid it puts me in very dumb situations like this
im scared of social situations i never feel good for anybody not everybody understands that i feel gery lonely all the time

 

[CatLvr]

i dont deserve none of your time
time will fix my feelings but lifes so stupid it puts me in very dumb situations like this
im scared of social situations i never feel good for anybody not everybody understands that i feel gery lonely all the time

I don't get lonely -- in fact the older I get the less I want to go out and deal with people. I much prefer the company of my dogs and cats. Now if I can just get my husband to stop coming home from work. Oh well ... Necessary evil I supposed. Otherwise I'd have to go out and deal with people daily. No thank you.

All that said -- you most assuredly deserve any time anybody wants to give you. I hear humans are social creatures and though I don't understand that sentiment at all I do sympathize with you because you want the interaction because you posted asking for it. Please take the comfort anyone is willing to give you. So few people bother anymore, so it is a huge privilege when someone offers their time. I hope you feel better soon.

 

[ilvgore]

311 that made me smile thank you:) afraid of not deserving things cause my parents never made me feel important so its harder for me to believe strangers will care about mei

 

[FishRain3469]

I'm not quite sure, but I believe that maybe I'm avpd. It's a terrible experience to say the Least. Here to talk about anything if you care to.

Wish you the best, please take care of yourself.

 

[ilvgore]

feel weird talkin about that in the opencause i feel like being judged and thats a really really unsettling feeling but i think u know about thta
my parents and everybody around me doesn't believe i have it because i was open and social but in reality i just hid it from them i was putting on a perfomance not to show my anxiety
maybe avpd is a genetic thing because my brother is the same as me but the parenting also played a role in that
oh and the psychatry also said the same thing lmao bit i felt weird talking to them so weird like people and all this social stuff is so alien to me u dont have to reply to this tbh i think it will become my venting avpd post
my dumb stupid parents are actually the reason for this.mess yeah i head killing thoughts but my heart is too big dont worry but i dont take rejection very lightly
i feel weird for people looking at me
so so low self esteem
prostitute from an early age dumb old men abused me
but it their attention was so good
i hate my stupid native genes i think but i think it makes me also.really special in regards to my looks
im very very very i hate my looks
sometimes i.wish i could live somewhere else like in the forest without this scary interaction stuff but we people with this disorder want connection but we make it so hard for ourselves and then try to destroy it what kind of stupid shit is that right?
i hate being the outcast girl my thinking i want to be normal
sorey english is not my native language
im to tired to write a whole book about how i am.feelimg and tsiff because thats another way to get me my attention i do never things to just be i want to be someone else like you get it?
my anything is a lot im sorry tell me about urself and the avpd thing like whats up?