Carlon55

Carlon55

New Member
Nov 19, 2018
4
i wish if i can do it too! but i am afraid in next life and what i am going to tell to God? and sometimes i feel God will forgive me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 4 others
BurningLights

BurningLights

He killed himself with his own mind
Jul 2, 2018
709
Good luck my friend, I hope you find the peace we all long for, I will be following in the next couple days, I'll try and catch up to you on the afterlife
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, worldexploder, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and 5 others
sadsoul

sadsoul

Alive and unwell
Sep 9, 2018
440
Fuck fuck fuck I failed again. I'm such a piece of shit, I can't do anything right. I feel so stupid for failing. It could be so fucking simple, but there's always something keeping me from ctb, and most of the time it's the survival instinct. It's so stupid, I'm fucking depressed all the time, I wanna die all the time, but when I'm about to do it the survival instinct kicks in and I get all these stupid irrational thoughts that keep me from ctb. And I get so scared, it's so painful.
It all makes no sense, the survival instinct makes no sense. How can pro-lifers say that wanting to end your life is irrational when the survival instinct is one of the most irrational things?

I had two chances to ctb this month, I fucked it up twice. I probably won't get another chance this year, which means that I have to deal with my shitty life for now. I wish I had my own apartment, ctb would be much easier because I could do it anytime. I feel so trapped, I don't want to live another month or even longer. Everything is so pointless. I don't want all this pain.

What I need right now is a big hug. I wish I could be with you. I want someone to comfort me. But sadly we're all spread across the world. I guess I'll have to continue to suffer alone :(
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, worldexploder, loz and 15 others
T

TiredHorse

Enlightened
Nov 1, 2018
1,819
I've flinched three times in the past month, and you have my complete sympathy: it's unbelievably awful. For me it's a wretched cocktail of ever deeper exhaustion, feeling like a coward, and knowing I'm still trapped here in this life. Survival instinct is a bitch.

I wish I could be there to comfort you, and perhaps seek some comfort in return.

Hang in there, man. Try and catch your breath; try and be kind to yourself. There's always another bus coming, and in the meantime those of us here at the bus stop are glad for your company.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, pushka, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and 9 others
DarkTear

DarkTear

Member
Aug 1, 2018
63
I'm such a piece of shit
No, you're not... I felt so terrible, sad and desperate because of you - and there's a reason for that. Because in our conversations you showed me that you're a very kind person. I'll send you a detailed PM in a little while. We'll talk about everything, OK? Until then: *BIG HUGS*
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 6 others
Retched

Retched

I see the chaos in your eyes.
Oct 8, 2018
837
I know the feeling of failure and keep looking for alternate ways but the tried and true hurt and survival instinct messes with us. I'm with you...I wish we all could get together. If I could, I would be there for you right now.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 6 others
Fucking loving it

Fucking loving it

Specialist
Sep 3, 2018
378
Hugs love cuddles
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 6 others
Carlon55

Carlon55

New Member
Nov 19, 2018
4
there was a man committed suicide yesterday here in my city, he left family and son, it's really sad
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 2 others
Eowyn

Eowyn

Member
Nov 4, 2018
41
:(
when it's time it will be your time
the waiting is the hardest part
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 7 others
rabid_squirrel

rabid_squirrel

Member
Nov 10, 2018
52
Fuck fuck fuck I failed again. I'm such a piece of shit, I can't do anything right. I feel so stupid for failing. It could be so fucking simple, but there's always something keeping me from ctb, and most of the time it's the survival instinct. It's so stupid, I'm fucking depressed all the time, I wanna die all the time, but when I'm about to do it the survival instinct kicks in and I get all these stupid irrational thoughts that keep me from ctb. And I get so scared, it's so painful.
It all makes no sense, the survival instinct makes no sense. How can pro-lifers say that wanting to end your life is irrational when the survival instinct is one of the most irrational things?

I had two chances to ctb this month, I fucked it up twice. I probably won't get another chance this year, which means that I have to deal with my shitty life for now. I wish I had my own apartment, ctb would be much easier because I could do it anytime. I feel so trapped, I don't want to live another month or even longer. Everything is so pointless. I don't want all this pain.

What I need right now is a big hug. I wish I could be with you. I want someone to comfort me. But sadly we're all spread across the world. I guess I'll have to continue to suffer alone :(
Don't beat yourself up,we all know how hard it can be.Many of us have failed,I failed three times if it could make you feel better.We are here for you,we will get there eventually.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Deafsn0w and 7 others
Lizzie S.

Lizzie S.

Experienced
Sep 2, 2018
258
:( this makes me sad but I wish you the best
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Lifeisatrap and 5 others
L

lv-gras

fledermausßßßßßßßß
Jul 27, 2018
617
Fuck fuck fuck I failed again. I'm such a piece of shit, I can't do anything right. I feel so stupid for failing. It could be so fucking simple, but there's always something keeping me from ctb, and most of the time it's the survival instinct. It's so stupid, I'm fucking depressed all the time, I wanna die all the time, but when I'm about to do it the survival instinct kicks in and I get all these stupid irrational thoughts that keep me from ctb. And I get so scared, it's so painful.
It all makes no sense, the survival instinct makes no sense. How can pro-lifers say that wanting to end your life is irrational when the survival instinct is one of the most irrational things?

I had two chances to ctb this month, I fucked it up twice. I probably won't get another chance this year, which means that I have to deal with my shitty life for now. I wish I had my own apartment, ctb would be much easier because I could do it anytime. I feel so trapped, I don't want to live another month or even longer. Everything is so pointless. I don't want all this pain.

What I need right now is a big hug. I wish I could be with you. I want someone to comfort me. But sadly we're all spread across the world. I guess I'll have to continue to suffer alone :(

big hugs
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, Going Home, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and 3 others
Toxic Person

Toxic Person

Member
Nov 11, 2018
50
I hope u find peace and i give u a really big hug.
Its makes me a lil bit sad but i wish u the best! U are a real nice person <3
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, sadsoul and 3 others
ouvreyes

ouvreyes

シシ
Oct 7, 2018
131
ahhh yeah, the survival instincts a bitch, especially with partial. Like my mind just empties and gets filled with "BAD BAD MAKE IT STOP", but the second I do I'm back to being filled the overwhelmingly heavy want to die that won't go away until I put the pressure back. It's an issue for so many of us here... I don't think you're stupid or whatever... partial is really hard. I'm sorry that no one can be there for you in person man. My thoughts are with you though.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Lifeisatrap and 2 others
T

tevati

Student
Sep 25, 2018
156
Why not fentanyl or SN should be easier, oncee taken no point of return
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Lifeisatrap and 2 others
sadsoul

sadsoul

Alive and unwell
Sep 9, 2018
440
Why not fentanyl or SN should be easier, oncee taken no point of return
I don't have access to fentanyl/SN and antiemetics. In fact the only reliable method I have access to is partial.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, lv-gras, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and 1 other person
BlackDragonof1989

BlackDragonof1989

Mage
Jul 12, 2018
526
Whatever the outcome, you have my best wishes.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, lv-gras, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and 2 others
jaemus12

jaemus12

Earth’s Parasite
May 11, 2018
562
I'm still here, the survival instinct took over
Don't be ashamed about it. Survival instinct is a bitch and is strong af.

For now, welcome back to the temporary safety of Sanctioned Suicide. We'll be here to support you.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Weeping Garbage Can, lv-gras, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and 2 others
J

Jaded

Student
Sep 8, 2018
111
I'm still here, the survival instinct took over
It's okay. It is brave to enough try this method ♡
I can't even contemplate it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap, Weeping Garbage Can, sadsoul and 1 other person
worldexploder

worldexploder

Visionary
Sep 19, 2018
2,821
Fuck fuck fuck I failed again. I'm such a piece of shit, I can't do anything right. I feel so stupid for failing. It could be so fucking simple, but there's always something keeping me from ctb, and most of the time it's the survival instinct. It's so stupid, I'm fucking depressed all the time, I wanna die all the time, but when I'm about to do it the survival instinct kicks in and I get all these stupid irrational thoughts that keep me from ctb. And I get so scared, it's so painful.
It all makes no sense, the survival instinct makes no sense. How can pro-lifers say that wanting to end your life is irrational when the survival instinct is one of the most irrational things?

I had two chances to ctb this month, I fucked it up twice. I probably won't get another chance this year, which means that I have to deal with my shitty life for now. I wish I had my own apartment, ctb would be much easier because I could do it anytime. I feel so trapped, I don't want to live another month or even longer. Everything is so pointless. I don't want all this pain.

What I need right now is a big hug. I wish I could be with you. I want someone to comfort me. But sadly we're all spread across the world. I guess I'll have to continue to suffer alone :(
Hey buddy. I'm really sorry things didn't work out. Please don't beat yourself up over this. So many people on SS including myself tried this method and failed. You are not alone my friend. Hanging is a very difficult method. Everyone has their limits when it comes to what they can take. You are not a piece of shit, not weak or cowardly. You're a human being who's in a lot of pain and deserve nothing but love and support.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Lifeisatrap, Weeping Garbage Can and 1 other person
sadsoul

sadsoul

Alive and unwell
Sep 9, 2018
440
Thank you to everyone who wrote such kind words ♡ I'm definitely feeling the love and support from you.
Big hugs from me to all of you.

*group hug* <3
 
  • Like
Reactions: DarkTear, lv-gras, Miss clefable and 1 other person

Similar threads

Death is love
Replies
6
Views
250
Suicide Discussion
xxCuteSprinklesxx
xxCuteSprinklesxx
iloveyouihateyou
Replies
0
Views
89
Suicide Discussion
iloveyouihateyou
iloveyouihateyou
dazed.daydreamer
Replies
6
Views
478
Suicide Discussion
dazed.daydreamer
dazed.daydreamer
PlannedforPeru
Replies
20
Views
947
Suicide Discussion
sweetcreep
sweetcreep
lostmilo
Replies
8
Views
298
Suicide Discussion
lifeisactualtorture
L