Torabol

Torabol

Student
Apr 15, 2023
105
Not existing is not like a dreamless night, if I had to guess. I like to try and think how things were before I was born and that sort of gives me an idea of what non existence is. Are you scared about not existing? I find it fascinating to think about, sometimes terrifying, sometimes liberating. The fact I can, with some amount of pain (due to the fact we're not given humane ways to exit life), wipe out everything and stop existing gives me solace.
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Right now, I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,913
sometimes
 
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JustABug

JustABug

Sinking in my skin
Aug 18, 2023
115
Not existing is not like a dreamless night, if I had to guess. I like to try and think how things were before I was born and that sort of gives me an idea of what non existence is. Are you scared about not existing? I find it fascinating to think about, sometimes terrifying, sometimes liberating. The fact I can, with some amount of pain (due to the fact we're not given humane ways to exit life), wipe out everything and stop existing gives me solace.
I like the idea. I mean if you were to stop existing you wouldn't even realise that it's happened. I like knowing that at any moment everything I have done with my life or experienced wouldn't matter to me anymore as i'd not be conscious of it.
 
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Darkover

Darkover

Angelic
Jul 29, 2021
4,720
when i was around 18 i had an extreme fear of death but has time went on i got use to the idea and i'm not afraid of cease to exist anymore
 
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N

nopointinlivingg

Member
Jul 13, 2022
69
Not at all. It is extremely comforting to think about.
 
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BlazingBob

BlazingBob

I'm still here b/c of my dogs
Oct 28, 2021
602
Not at all. Quite the contrary. I'm looking forward to it because my current existence fucking blows. My concern is how to achieve non existence. Not as easy as I thought but nothing a trip to the sporting goods store can't fix.
 
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haibane

haibane

Reki
Sep 27, 2023
258
As i personally value not existing as preferable, i think that the whole idea of no longer existing is really soothing and conforting
 
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blehh1923

blehh1923

Member
Oct 15, 2023
7
i think of death as like sleeping, you don't remember when you fell asleep and it just happened . like boom darkness except death you don't wake up so its like it never happened. i hope ppl understand what I'm tryna say
 
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R_N

R_N

-Memento Mori-
Dec 3, 2019
1,442
I am more scared of things existing even after I die and people still not knowing a lot.
 
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兎の耳

兎の耳

The ghost of a girl who never lived.
Aug 3, 2023
134
I remember when I first really grasped the concept of forever. I was a teenager, lying in bed thinking about how nobody would miss me if I was gone, and how it would be nice to just stop existing forever. I started to think about how long forever really was and suddenly I truly understood it for the first time. I realized that when I'd been dead for a billion, billion years it wouldn't even be a single nanosecond in the tapestry of eternity. I felt it stretching out in front of me like a huge, dark ocean and I was terrified. I felt like I had uncovered some sort of horrible, eldritch secret nobody was supposed to know.

I remember getting up and turning on every light in the house; I couldn't stand to be in the dark. I stayed up all night on the couch reading bible passages, despite being an atheist, hoping they'd give me some sort of shelter from the existential terror. They didn't. I spent that whole summer in a kind of fugue. state, and my parents took me to the first of many doctors, who started on antidepressants. That started a long downward spiral that led me to where I am right now, posting on a support site for the suicidal.

To answer your question, the idea of an eternity of nonexistence terrifies me. I understand that it's a completely irrational fear, since once I'm dead I won't experience anything, and forever won't be any different to me than an instant. I'm just not a very rational person, I suppose.
 
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Torabol

Torabol

Student
Apr 15, 2023
105
I remember when I first really grasped the concept of forever. I was a teenager, lying in bed thinking about how nobody would miss me if I was gone, and how it would be nice to just stop existing forever. I started to think about how long forever really was and suddenly I truly understood it for the first time. I realized that when I'd been dead for a billion, billion years it wouldn't even be a single nanosecond in the tapestry of eternity. I felt it stretching out in front of me like a huge, dark ocean and I was terrified. I felt like I had uncovered some sort of horrible, eldritch secret nobody was supposed to know.

I remember getting up and turning on every light in the house; I couldn't stand to be in the dark. I stayed up all night on the couch reading bible passages, despite being an atheist, hoping they'd give me some sort of shelter from the existential terror. They didn't. I spent that whole summer in a kind of fugue. state, and my parents took me to the first of many doctors, who started on antidepressants. That started a long downward spiral that led me to where I am right now, posting on a support site for the suicidal.

To answer your question, the idea of an eternity of nonexistence terrifies me. I understand that it's a completely irrational fear, since once I'm dead I won't experience anything, and forever won't be any different to me than an instant. I'm just not a very rational person, I suppose.
Beautifully written, thank you for sharing your experience - fathoming the consequences of non existence really does sound like a secret no one should know about. It is truly a curse for some of us.
 
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ABSOLUTION

ABSOLUTION

Member
Jul 25, 2023
61
Yeah, it did in the past.
But, I thought about it for a long time, breaking my fear down with rational thought to the point where I'm fine with it now.
The biggest thing for me is the fact that I will die and become confined to this unknown state of non existence anyway, all I have to consider is if the rest of my life is worth living or if I can skip past it all without regretting it.
And as time goes on and I ponder it more, the answer to that consideration is becoming clearer and clearer.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,878
No, in fact the thought of such a thing is all that comforts me, all that I wish for is a peaceful, dreamless and eternal sleep. Only nothingness is perfect to me, I only see the eternity of death as desirable.

Instead what I fear is existence as after all it's the source of all suffering, it's such a terrible burden to exist as a conscious being in this hellish and harmful reality where there is no limit as to how much one can suffer. For me death means peace, the only relief lies in this existence being eternally forgotten about.
 
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ApathyToLife

ApathyToLife

Send in the clowns.
Aug 18, 2023
56
Excited about it. No pain, no misery, no trauma, no responsibilities, a well-deserved gift after years of struggling.
 
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