Are you looking to die because of health problems?

[Ambivalent1]

What health problems?

 

[CouldaHvBeenARock]

Depression mostly
I've managed to get my other illnesses to a good place but depression won't let go
Currently I'm disabled by my symptoms so I can't live an independent life and I'm forced to live with my toxic family

Also I hate taking the meds and visiting doctors, staying in hospitals etc
I'm really tired of the whole rollercoaster

 

[GroundControl]

What health problems?

Borderline Personality Disorder. It is a debilitating illness and coupled with the fact that I am stuck in an abusive situation, things just keep getting worse. I also have nerve damage in my arms from cutting so much, and it causes me lots of pain. Medication barely helps. I want things to be over.

 

[Joker2003]

I have had severe anxiety for nearly my entire life and was diagnosed with Autism two years ago.

I recently had an MRI and CT scan of my brain due to headaches, fatigue, poor memory, and visual static. They found multiple lesions on my brain and suspect that I may have a demyelinating disease. I meet with a neurologist next month.

I am only 20 years old, and I am already very tired of life.

 

[sleepingintherain]

What health problems?

gender dysphoria. i started hormones too late and look like a man permanently now so i would rather just be dead

 

[SadLad]

Body dysmorphia. Depression and social anxiety. Pretty much can't leave the house unless it's to go to work.

 

[Unknown21]

I don't have physical problems just mental and financial problems.

 

[Patches]

Pretty much yes. I have a list of issues. While none are terminal, it's becoming more difficult to function with age.

Biggest problem is not having anyone who wants to look into anything. Pills have been the only solution. I wasted a decade on them, they solved nothing and created new unwanted issues.

I'm legally deaf (can hear)
Severe tinnitus
Undiagnosed mental health issues (anxiety and depression are obvious)
Asthma
Sleep apnia
Insomnia
Lower back and knees are shot.
Hernia (two tears that I know of)
GERD
And more..

I don't sleep well, eat enough, focus is limited and I'm physically and mentally getting worse. The loudest thing I hear sounds like microphone feedback which has been going for 20 years now. Tinnitus on its own can be pure insanity. I see people cringe in pain at the sound of 5 seconds of microphone feedback. It just doesn't stop for me, and I wouldn't wish this upon anyone.

Eventually I will snap, I'd like to prepare myself for when that happens. My mother died at 60 from dementia, there's a chance I may be following that path. So I believe that Its not a question of if, but when.

 

[wait.what]

Yes and no…if it were only my physical problems, I think I could cope. The issue is that at times I can't really care for myself, and my family isn't going to do it for me. That means institutionalization of some kind, and THAT is frequently like being in one of the lower levels of hell.

By that I mean staff who are openly hostile when you ask them to do anything, and who don't wear their name tags or keep them flipped around backward so you can't complain about them. I mean being given the wrong meds, or not getting the right ones. Sometimes you get the right meds, but hours late, or at times that make no sense. Like sleep meds in the morning, or meds that keep you awake at night. I mean terrible hygiene among the patients because no one helps them bathe, or get to the toilet. I mean old people crying "Help, help!" over and over from their rooms, and staff ignoring them. Just terrible mistreatment and neglect. There's something about being helpless that brings out the absolute worst in some people.

I've been stuck in such places twice, and both times I had a very difficult time getting out. There's also this weird circular logic that gets applied to you: "Oh, you're in an institution, nothing you say is reliable. We know you're not reliable because you're in an institution."

One of my nastier conditions is degenerative, and I live in fear of the day that I get parked in some nursing home where they put fresh flowers in the visiting areas but all of the bedrooms smell like pee.

I'll eat my gun before I get locked in a place like that.

 

[Chronicoverwhelm]

ADHD diagnosed, and I suspect Autism. Anxiety and depression as a result. Brain fog is crippling. Possibly BPD.

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Hypothyroidism, Asthma, allergies, POTS, mast cell activation syndrome, chronic reactivating Epstein Barre, possibly Lyme (undiagnosed but highly suspected), chronic severe chest pain, mold toxicity, MTHFR genetic mutations in liver.

I've lost a great deal of independence and rely heavily on a friend. I've been on disability for 4 years. My employer is looking to get rid of me soon, once I'm deemed permanently disabled. My illnesses make me feel like I can relate to someone with dementia.

 

[logi3535]

I have asthma among other things, it isn't as bad as it was when i was younger but it can still be a hinderance

i kept up the facade that my asthma was getting better to my father because I didn't want him to have to keep paying for inhalers when they're so expensive, and the fact that I don't plan on being here past june anyways so it would be a waste

i'd be lying if i said my asthma has gotten better, but it's managable for now, I can make do until june

 

[Ambivalent1]

I have asthma among other things, it isn't as bad as it was when i was younger but it can still be a hinderance

i kept up the facade that my asthma was getting better to my father because I didn't want him to have to keep paying for inhalers when they're so expensive, and the fact that I don't plan on being here past june anyways so it would be a waste

i'd be lying if i said my asthma has gotten better, but it's managable for now, I can make do until june

What symptoms are the most bothersome?

 

[logi3535]

What symptoms are the most bothersome?

wheezing and this tight feeling in my chest mostly, it feels like im drowning or suffocating, just not as extreme as someone who really is suffocating, the worst is when my allergies act up and im in an enviroment thats really dusty because dust is what triggers it a lot, seriously feels like im gonna pass out,

my father has taken so much care throughout my life to ensure the house is always clean and i don't have to deal with it and i'm so grateful for that, whenver I try and clean it just makes my lungs feel even tighter and it feels even harder to breathe, thankfully i've never had a serious asthma attack like how I see others deal with so mine must be fairly mild

 

[Ambivalent1]

wheezing and this tight feeling in my chest mostly, it feels like im drowning or suffocating, just not as extreme as someone who really is suffocating, the worst is when my allergies act up and im in an enviroment thats really dusty because dust is what triggers it a lot, seriously feels like im gonna pass out,

my father has taken so much care throughout my life to ensure the house is always clean and i don't have to deal with it and i'm so grateful for that, whenver I try and clean it just makes my lungs feel even tighter and it feels even harder to breathe, thankfully i've never had a serious asthma attack like how I see others deal with so mine must be fairly mild

Do you cough up mucus and have trouble breathing? I had asthma as a child but the lung specialist said I don't have it anymore but I have something like it.

 

[logi3535]

Do you cough up mucus and have trouble breathing? I had asthma as a child but the lung specialist said I don't have it anymore but I have something like it.

not really sure, i have trouble breathing a lot but i can't really remember a time when mucus was a big issue, though now that i think about it, the times i had mucus probably was because of my asthma, but again i haven't had to deal with that in a long time so im not sure

and yea i think you actually can 'grow out' of it or something like that, i remember my asthma was really bad in elementary but then i started running a lot in middle and high school and after that my asthma was toned down by a lot so i dunno

 

[Valky]

Depression, sleeping disorder and generalised anxiety disorder with focus on social and performance anxiety

 

[Linda]

gender dysphoria. i started hormones too late and look like a man permanently now so i would rather just be dead

How tall are you? What size are your feet? If both are within the normal female range you will probably be able to pass if you make enough effort and go about it the right way. If both are well outside that range, you won't, but in that case no amount of hormones would ever have been enough to pass convincingly. You can grow breasts at any age, by just taking anti-androgens, such as spironolactone, and you should do that in any case to avoid male-pattern baldness. You can get rid of unwanted hair, and you can do it easily if your skin is pale and your hair dark. (Just buy and use an IPL unit.) To pass, pay attention to ALL the details: clothing, jewellry, hairstyle, nails, voice and mannerisms - the effect is cumulative. Learn the things that women tend to do but men don't; for example, we often give small compliments on some aspect of another woman's appearance, but men hardly ever do that. I have known some trans women (one of whom transitioned successfully when she was over 60), I have read up on the subject as a result, and so I now have a reasonably good understanding of what works (and what doesn't.)

 

[Ambivalent1]

not really sure, i have trouble breathing a lot but i can't really remember a time when mucus was a big issue, though now that i think about it, the times i had mucus probably was because of my asthma, but again i haven't had to deal with that in a long time so im not sure

and yea i think you actually can 'grow out' of it or something like that, i remember my asthma was really bad in elementary but then i started running a lot in middle and high school and after that my asthma was toned down by a lot so i dunno

But it came back?

 

[DreamEnd]

Yes. Mental illness

 

[logi3535]

But it came back?

sortof, like i said it isn't as bad now as it was before when i was way younger, i was just bringing up the fact that i've heard other folks talk about their asthmatic conditions dissapearing over time

 

[Patches]

wheezing and this tight feeling in my chest mostly, it feels like im drowning or suffocating, just not as extreme as someone who really is suffocating, the worst is when my allergies act up and im in an enviroment thats really dusty because dust is what triggers it a lot, seriously feels like im gonna pass out,

my father has taken so much care throughout my life to ensure the house is always clean and i don't have to deal with it and i'm so grateful for that, whenver I try and clean it just makes my lungs feel even tighter and it feels even harder to breathe, thankfully i've never had a serious asthma attack like how I see others deal with so mine must be fairly mild

Asthma is horrible. I had it bad as a child and always needed 3 types of inhalers (blue, brown, orange). I don't need them as much anymore, though sometimes I do if it gets triggered. I keep one in case I need it. I don't like the feeling of every breath giving the sensation of being stabbed by daggers.

You might do this already, but what helps me get to sleep is a small table fan, i point it in the general direction of my face, not directly. Just clean it of dust often so you don't have that blown at you.This helps me breath better. (I should be using a CPAP machine but I can't afford one)

Also humidity control, my area gets cold and dry to warm and humid. So I try to keep the humidity between 40-60 percent. (Without dehumidifier/humidifiers it goes as low as 10 percent and as high as 85 season depending)

Allergy pills are my savior during the summer when my seasonal allergies kick in. Aerius has done me well.

These few things have made a difference for me in not needing the inhalers constantly. I can't promise results, but it may help you be a little more comfortable.

 

[logi3535]

Asthma is horrible. I had it bad as a child and always needed 3 types of inhalers (blue, brown, orange). I don't need them as much anymore, though sometimes I do if it gets triggered. I keep one in case I need it. I don't like the feeling of every breath giving the sensation of being stabbed by daggers.

You might do this already, but what helps me get to sleep is a small table fan, i point it in the general direction of my face, not directly. Just clean it of dust often so you don't have that blown at you.This helps me breath better. (I should be using a CPAP machine but I can't afford one)

Also humidity control, my area gets cold and dry to warm and humid. So I try to keep the humidity between 40-60 percent. (Without dehumidifier/humidifiers it goes as low as 10 percent and as high as 85 season depending)

Allergy pills are my savior during the summer when my seasonal allergies kick in. Aerius has done me well.

These few things have made a difference for me in not needing the inhalers constantly. I can't promise results, but it may help you be a little more comfortable.

YES, the stabbing with daggers part hits me so well, it literally feels like i'm being pierced by millions of them inside my body, i don't know if they're related but i know i'm also extremely sensitive to heat, not sure if thats asthma related or not but it usually triggers under the same conditions, and it only pops up when i have trouble breathing, though i was not aware there were so many types of inhalers, i only had red ones and a blue one earlier in my childhood

thank you so much for the sage advice, i do keep a fan aimed at me and i have noticed that when humidity increases, so too does my trouble breathing, i also tend to get nosebleeds as well but again i'm not sure if thats related, i hope you don't struggle with it too much anymore because yes, asthma is horrible, nobody deserves to deal with it, its made me feel so grateful when i can actually breathe

 

[sserafim]

Yeah, I'm mainly looking to die because of my neurodivergences (Asperger's, ADHD, etc). I guess you could call them health problems. I'm not a good fit for the world and the world isn't a good fit for me either, so why even try? The world just wasn't built or meant for people like me, it's so annoying that I have to live in a world built and meant for neurotypicals.

 

[Patches]

YES, the stabbing with daggers part hits me so well, it literally feels like i'm being pierced by millions of them inside my body, i don't know if they're related but i know i'm also extremely sensitive to heat, not sure if thats asthma related or not but it usually triggers under the same conditions, and it only pops up when i have trouble breathing, though i was not aware there were so many types of inhalers, i only had red ones and a blue one earlier in my childhood

thank you so much for the sage advice, i do keep a fan aimed at me and i have noticed that when humidity increases, so too does my trouble breathing, i also tend to get nosebleeds as well but again i'm not sure if thats related, i hope you don't struggle with it too much anymore because yes, asthma is horrible, nobody deserves to deal with it, its made me feel so grateful when i can actually breathe

Both heat and cold affect me badly at times. In summer, I have to avoid the hottest days. Ditto for very cold winter weather. Anything that will dry out or inflame your sinuses will affect your breathing. You could also try lozenges like Halls, or vicks vapor rub (rub it on your chest or put a tiny dab under your nose) if you have those available. Just don't use it too heavily because too much mentol could bother you as it is a strong smell.

There's even a product that I can't think of the name, but its a strip that sticks over your nose and it helps spread your nostrils open. You stick it on at bedtime. I haven't tried it, but heard from a few people that it helped them breathe through their nose easier for sleeping.

Nosebleeds can be dryness related. If you're in a winter wonderland like I am, that can be a dry time of year (water is frozen, no humidity), so i keep a few small humidifiers running to bring the humidity up (or boil a big pot of water). I have a few thermometers around that also measure humidity. Mine are just cheap dollar store digital ones and they work great. Humidity control can help. Too dry is bad, too humid is bad. 40-60 percent is good.

I don't suffer like I used to. There's no way I could run very far without collapsing , but I can take a brisk walk up a hill without being too out of breath. I've had a lot of time to figure out what to avoid and what can help. It still sucks to be asthmatic and have sleep apnia, but I don't need the inhaler unless I'm exposed to a trigger or catch a bad cold.

 

[Onomatopoeia]

Mental health problem, yes. My husband was murdered right in front of me, sitting a few inches from me. That image, the aftermath, and many people celebrating his death have destroyed me. We were pregnant with our first child when it happened, and I miscarried a week later because of the stress and sadness. I want to be with my husband and our baby.

 

[strangelife]

I did not want to die until I fell ill with a neurological disease, now my life does not give me any pleasure and in this state I do not want to continue, I understand it will not be easy for my loved ones, but my torment is also worth understanding.

 

[Defenestration]

Yes lots of psychiatric illness

 

[WeirdGirlAnon]

severe chronic pain from ehlers danlos syndrome and a bunch of related conditions plus depression and anxiety. If the world was different I feel like I could cope but it sucks to suck I guess<3

 

[sleepingintherain]

How tall are you? What size are your feet? If both are within the normal female range you will probably be able to pass if you make enough effort and go about it the right way. If both are well outside that range, you won't, but in that case no amount of hormones would ever have been enough to pass convincingly. You can grow breasts at any age, by just taking anti-androgens, such as spironolactone, and you should do that in any case to avoid male-pattern baldness. You can get rid of unwanted hair, and you can do it easily if your skin is pale and your hair dark. (Just buy and use an IPL unit.) To pass, pay attention to ALL the details: clothing, jewellry, hairstyle, nails, voice and mannerisms - the effect is cumulative. Learn the things that women tend to do but men don't; for example, we often give small compliments on some aspect of another woman's appearance, but men hardly ever do that. I have known some trans women (one of whom transitioned successfully when she was over 60), I have read up on the subject as a result, and so I now have a reasonably good understanding of what works (and what doesn't.)

I'm 5'4.5" and my hands and feet aren't that big. But my face is masculine and my shoulders are wide. I started HRT when I was 16 and I'm 20 now, which is enough for most people to pass, but it was too late for me.

 

[caninecomposer]

Aside from unbearable depression and anxiety, I just suddenly had a weird health problem occur and it might need surgery, but I have no health insurance and I'd much rather perish than try to figure out the process of getting it dealt with and not going into debt.