Are you beyond saving?

[leavingthesoultrap]

I don't know.
So many things would have to go in my favor in order to fix this situation.
Some of them are in my control but some of them aren't

 

[cryone]

its very hard to imagine how it would be like, but im pretty sure a loving relationship would save me.

 

[Ontwon]

I voted "don't know." Because, truly, I 'dunno. I'm at least willing to try.

I already have a lot of things that people would want, wish for, or need to live. I would probably say that I have all of the things, except for money. More money would be nice. I would love to not worry about bills, to be able to take care of myself, to repay favors, spoil loved ones, afford therapy and medication again. Maybe I would be happier then. But when I had the money to afford these things, minus the bills, I still wasn't happy. Even with therapy, and medication (that worked for its intended purpose), love from friends and romantic prospects, attention and care, familial support, a privileged lifestyle in general, I still wasn't happy. I still wanted to die. I'm still not happy, and I still want to die.

So, I guess sometimes I just feel broken beyond repair. Like I have too many fragmented parts and too many deep cracks to fill and fix. But I can still be something new, so there's always a chance.

I'm always going to be who I am, though. I'll always have my diagnosis and I'll need to rely on medication forever to stabilize my moods. I'll probably always want to die simply because that's a part of my life's ups and downs. I'll always feel crazy and like I want to rip myself out of my skin, like I'm not really a person among the people that I'm always around. Sometimes I think the real question is whether a life like that is really worth it for me, because no matter how "good" things get and no matter how much things "progress," I don't get better, I'm not convinced that living is worth it…

Are you me?? Haha no seriously what you wrote is really relatable, thank you for sharing

 

[targz]

Depends on how you defined 'saving'... because I will save myself and nobody can stop me!

 

[Gardenia]

Money would.
Because I hate my job and I can't have a job that would be different enough from my current one to make me feel alive and not depressed. I mean, I can't quit my job to go work at a pet store for instance, because I wouldn't have enough money to pay my bills. My current job gives me a financial stability but it's hell.

If I could win the lottery and stop working at my shitty job I think I would feel better.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

More like I don't see any reason to continue improving / recovering.

 

[SnakesButNoLadder]

I never replied to my own thread. But I'm within saving.

All I need is to move away, far away. Away from people who want to ruin me.

Or closure, for the police to actually do their job. For people to be punished for stalking, fraud, and being complicit.

 

[desperatetoctb]

I feel like almost everbody could be saved.
However most times it requires things to happen, that just wont happen.