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AloneOrAbused

New Member
Jun 20, 2018
4
Who is going to take care of your kids after you go?

Wow... that almost sounds like a guilt trip. It's not, I promise. I'm having a hard time making arrangements for my kid - so I'm just curious what others will do.
 
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Nauseated

Nauseated

Insomnio
Jun 26, 2018
224
Is there any possible way to hold off on it until your child is of age to take care of themselves I know living like this is unbearable but you kind of owe it to them in a a way.
 
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PhilistineEars

PhilistineEars

Member
Jul 1, 2018
62
I am and I know what you're trying to do. This is where people really get separated, but I get it.
 
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Volatile

Volatile

God
Jun 18, 2018
1,286
The government can take care of them. Ever hear of Foster Care?
 
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W

war-is-lost

Student
Apr 15, 2018
124
I am a parent. I know what I am about to do is selfish as shit. But I have tried so hard for so long to get well but to no avail. I couldn't hold on any more. I am actually amazed I am still here. So whatever you are thinking, I understand. People are going to judge but so be it. If you can't handle the pain and suffering any more like me, you have to do what you got to do. That said, I have made arrangements the best I could for my kid but of course it's nothing like having a father around. I hope you can come to peace with whatever decision you make.
 
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K

Karlala

Member
Jun 27, 2018
74
I am a parent as well I use to have three children in my home my wife left with our child and she was step mom to my other two children who are on vacation with their mom for the summer. This has devastated us all . And the fact I'm going to end my life seems so selfish but I cant bear what's to come. Their mom will finally have to step up and be a better parent. Now all that is left for me here is pain and sickness cancer. Now I'm alone and cant seem to move forward. It will hurt them that I'm gone . That's why I sent them away I haven't spoken to them in weeks when they call I just dont answer I cry but I know what I'm about to do they wont understand. What does make me?
 
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Definitelyworried

Definitelyworried

Member
Jun 19, 2018
551
I am a parent as well I use to have three children in my home my wife left with our child and she was step mom to my other two children who are on vacation with their mom for the summer. This has devastated us all . And the fact I'm going to end my life seems so selfish but I cant bear what's to come. Their mom will finally have to step up and be a better parent. Now all that is left for me here is pain and sickness cancer. Now I'm alone and cant seem to move forward. It will hurt them that I'm gone . That's why I sent them away I haven't spoken to them in weeks when they call I just dont answer I cry but I know what I'm about to do they wont understand. What does make me?
I'm really sorry to hear this.
Why does life have to be so hard
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
I am a parent too with a 9 year old.we lost his father and my hubby very suddenly just under two years ago.
I have had severe depression since with one serious sucicide attempt to date.I constantly think about sucicide which is why I have found this site.i do love my boy so very much but living has become a sacrifice as I am just living for him and not for me.he has so much to give and experience.The idea of leaving him behind and the pain i would cause him if i were to go is very cruel .
I know no one would care for him in the same way.he lost his wonderful and amazing father which brings me to the conclusion that we should go together and all be together once more.i know I will be hated for this comment and I am so sorry but desperation takes you to very dark and dangerous places.
 
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Definitelyworried

Definitelyworried

Member
Jun 19, 2018
551
I'm sorry to hear this.
How long have you felt this way?
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
Since my husband died.which is why I am so tired of fighting it now.it's very sad and I would give anything to take the feelings away.I know it's so wrong as his life is not mine to take but I don't want him to be alone and feel guilty thinking he was not good enough for me.I am hurting so badly.
 
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M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,035
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
I have been in care and it's shit that's why it not going to be an option for him.it's me or nothing.simple as that !
 
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T

Tiburcio

Guest
Sorry if I make you feel bad. I usually am comprehensive with suicidal but if I don't give my opinion I explode.

Having a child and leave him alone after it is the most miserable thing I can imagine.
 
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Definitelyworried

Definitelyworried

Member
Jun 19, 2018
551
I'm having a really bad anxiety attack right now too. I'm hurting really badly too. Feeling like this is not fair. This is not life.
I don't know what to do.
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
I have been in care all my life and know how hard and painful this can be which is why it is not an option for him.The 2 choices are me or nothing.
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
I am sorry to upset people and maybe I should not have posted but I need someone to knock some kind of sense into me before it is too late
 
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LIFEFUCKINGSUCKS

LIFEFUCKINGSUCKS

2muchofapussytokillmyself
Jun 26, 2018
11
From the perspective of a teenager who lost a parent at a young age (not to suicide, though). If my parents were suffering, I would want their suffering to end as soon as possible. If suicide were their only way out, I'd be sad but respect their choice. At first your children might feel abandoned or not cared for, but with time they might come to sympathize with your decision and maybe even accept it. Don't blame yourselves since at the end of the day most of us are suffering here and we deserve to be free from the pain, even if it takes suicide to achieve that.
 
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M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,035
I am sorry to upset people and maybe I should not have posted but I need someone to knock some kind of sense into me before it is too late
My apologies. I don't mean to guilty trip you. I know suffering well, and believe me, I know how it feels to live solely for someone else, because I am in the same situation. It sucks to grow up without a mother and a father, but I wouldn't be able to ask you to not kill yourself or to attempt to guilty trip you. I don't think you would be here posting this if you weren't suffering a lot.
 
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K

Karlala

Member
Jun 27, 2018
74
Do not take your son with you do you have any other family that he can go to while you think about what you want to do. Taking his life would be murder. Sorry to say that but the way you have spoken about your son I can tell you would never want to harm him. Mankind a decision to leave is one thing but taking him with you w po uld be wrong. Think about it clearly before you make any choices.
 
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T

Tiburcio

Guest
From the perspective of a teenager who lost a parent at a young age (not to suicide, though). If my parents were suffering, I would want their suffering to end as soon as possible. If suicide were their only way out, I'd be sad but respect their choice. At first your children might feel abandoned or not cared for, but with time they might come to sympathize with your decision and maybe even accept it. Don't blame yourselves since at the end of the day most of us are suffering here and we deserve to be free from the pain, even if it takes suicide to achieve that.
Sorry but I disagree. If parents are suffering, why they don't think the consequences of having a kid? I'm talking from the perspective of somebody which parents were depressed since they had me. And they RUINED my life. I mean, why to have a child if you can't give him something better? Where's the point? And also, now you prenend to leave him, completely alone? No. You parents, must be consequent with your actions. And don't ruin their life in such way.
 
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M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,035
The suffering could have started after they had a kid.
 
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LIFEFUCKINGSUCKS

LIFEFUCKINGSUCKS

2muchofapussytokillmyself
Jun 26, 2018
11
Sorry but I disagree. If parents are suffering, why they don't think the consequences of having a kid? I'm talking from the perspective of somebody which parents were depressed since they had me. And they RUINED my life. I mean, why to have a child if you can't give him something better? Where's the point? And also, now you prenend to leave him, completely alone? No. You parents, must be consequent with your actions. And don't ruin their life in such way.

I agree that people who are depressed or suicidal should refrain from having children. The thing is if you've already had the children then there's no going back. In that case you should do absolutely everything in your power to stay alive like therapy and all that jazz. If you've exhausted all options and feel like you cannot go on living anymore, then I think it's okay to end your life as long as you leave your child with a good support system and assure him/her it's absolutely not their fault. Maybe it will be worse for the child to have a parent around who detests their own existence and is suffering day in and day out.. the child can sense that and it might affect him/her negatively. This is just my opinion by the way, I can see where you're coming from.
 
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M

millefeui

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2018
1,035
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
Me and my husband were together for 27 years.we were soul mates and best friends.we had such a great life and his death has taken everything away.we choose to have our son and as a parent,I have always loved and cared for him.i had never suffered from depression or had sucicidal thoughts before hubby's death.
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
My son is 9 now.his dad died when he was 7.yes I agree that having children when you have depresson or are suicidal is very selfish.
 
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T

transgenderfailure

Subhuman Creature
Apr 30, 2018
118
My son is 9 now.his dad died when he was 7.yes I agree that having children when you have depresson or are suicidal is very selfish.

Whatever you do.. Don't take an innocent soul with you. He did not ask for any of this.

Best case scenario would be if you could find a good therapist, because it sounds to me like you haven't successfully gone through the 5 stages of grief... Yes, you too can find acceptance in this horrible situation, you may just need some help.

Please read this for the sake of your 9-year-old angel who never asked to be on this world in the first place. You owe it to him.

https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
Thankyou.I will do.
I thought people would be horrible to me given what I said and I would have deserved it.I appreciate the feedback and understanding from everyone.
Many thanks.
 
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YaYaDr

YaYaDr

Student
Jun 26, 2018
128
Apparently it's ok here to harass someone on their post seeking help - trying to talk them out of things which they really know nothing about. It's not ok however to get mad at people for it.

I've been warned that I'll be banned. I self harmed all morning because of these comments, but I can't respond the way I want to.

Try to stop assuming you know everything about a person. It's hurtful and makes me feel so alone I could just rip myself to shreds. You all want understanding, but then you act like this...

(Obviously not everyone, but a lot of you... some more than once...)

We all whine about people being vigilantes with the suicidal, then we do it to each other. Thanks for making this harder for me.
I don't know you. I don't know what you're going through. I don't even have a kid. But I am sorry that you had to go through this. Nobody should have to feel attacked for a decision as personal as suicide. A close friend once told me that in many situations, there is no right or wrong, there is only perspective. I hope this one experience doesn't sour you towards the entire forum. Whatever you choose I am sure you will try your very best to do what's right for you and your child.
 
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