Are some people just not designed for human life?

[Clut]

It's weird. I just don't think I was meant to be here, like it was some kind of.mistake of nature. For my whole life I've been in an almost constant state of something which doesn't feel right. Like an agitation and a restlessness and I'm just not good at existing. Of course I've experienced forms of trauma but this feeling of wanting to jump out of my own skin isn't a result of that I don't think. It's just always been there and I can't explain it or seem to do anything about it. I just don't think that I'm meant to be here but if I go it will upset some people but it really upsets me to think of being around indefinitely. Not sure if this makes any sense.

 

[MYStERY_Man]

Well, yes. Mutations happen and it's only natural that even after 4 billion years of evolution, there are some living beings who are not fit for life. Not just humans.

But to actually understand whether we are one of those few or one of the majority who would find comfort with being alive if we received proper care... that's the hard part.

 

[Clut]

Well, yes. Mutations happen and it's only natural that even after 4 billion years of evolution, there are some living beings who are not fit for life. Not just humans.

But to actually understand whether we are one of those few or one of the majority who would find comfort with being alive if we received proper care... that's the hard part.

Thanks for replying! Yes, I wonder if it's.possible to find that out. Or does it even matter if the end result is the same? Sorry I don't really know where I'm going with this, just trying and failing to voice some frustrations I think and I don't think i'll be judged here

 

[DarkNearDeath]

We were never designed for it. Selfishly spawned to suffer, with the only end is death.

 

[MYStERY_Man]

Thanks for replying! Yes, I wonder if it's.possible to find that out. Or does it even matter if the end result is the same? Sorry I don't really know where I'm going with this, just trying and failing to voice some frustrations I think and I don't think i'll be judged here

I've been repeating ad nauseum that if you haven't sought help yet, then your odds are pretty good.

Many times I've been very close to CTB knowing perfectly well that I was giving up a decent chance to recover.

But I've been trying to follow the advice lately. 4 sessions of therapy, 1 appointment with a psychiatrist, starting on drugs tomorrow. Not without hardships, but I keep pushing as I'm curious about where this path is taking me.

Does it matter? It depends. You said you don't want to CTB in order to not upset some people, but you also don't want to stick around indefinitely. That's perfectly reasonable. But what if there was a reality where you would want to stick around? Wouldn't that be better for everyone?

Unfortunately, the only way to find out which group we belong to is to go through the recovery options, which isn't easy, and see what happens.

 

[ClownMe]

yes, me.

 

[ScaredToLive]

I don't feel that my actual soul fits in with the world really. I'm always deeply unhappy and unable to look past things I consider nasty or people actions I find immoral so I'm miserable all the time. Essentially I can't handle all the badness in the world

 

[UseItOrLoseIt]

I do feel that way. Like a puzzle piece that doesn't fit anywhere without stumbling, bending, contorting or breaking.

 

[Life sucks]

Life itself is a bad design.

 

[Deleted_9cKnXB34QG]

Yes. I've always felt like an alien, it's as if I came here by mistake. Human behavior makes no sens to me.

 

[Clut]

I've been repeating ad nauseum that if you haven't sought help yet, then your odds are pretty good.

Many times I've been very close to CTB knowing perfectly well that I was giving up a decent chance to recover.

But I've been trying to follow the advice lately. 4 sessions of therapy, 1 appointment with a psychiatrist, starting on drugs tomorrow. Not without hardships, but I keep pushing as I'm curious about where this path is taking me.

Does it matter? It depends. You said you don't want to CTB in order to not upset some people, but you also don't want to stick around indefinitely. That's perfectly reasonable. But what if there was a reality where you would want to stick around? Wouldn't that be better for everyone?

Unfortunately, the only way to find out which group we belong to is to go through the recovery options, which isn't easy, and see what happens.

Thanks for replying. Sorry, should have clarified, I've been seeking help for years. I just don't seem to hit the sweet spot in terms of help, I'm on a waiting list to see a specialist so I guess I should hold out for that but it's a looooong wait!

Yes. I've always felt like an alien, it's as if I came here by mistake. Human behavior makes no sens to me.

Thanks! Me too! Sorry you feel like this as well but it helps to know it isn't just me

Life itself is a bad design.

I agree, and I don't know how to change that. I guess the obvious answer is that we can't?

I do feel that way. Like a puzzle piece that doesn't fit anywhere without stumbling, bending, contorting or breaking.

So sorry you feel like this also. Knowing it isn't only me feeling like this is helpful though, thank you

We were never designed for it. Selfishly spawned to suffer, with the only end is death.

It's such a weird concept - here have this life full of pain and confusion and don't you dare dispose of it until your time is naturally up! Wtf!

 

[Pluto]

It's weird. I just don't think I was meant to be here, like it was some kind of.mistake of nature. For my whole life I've been in an almost constant state of something which doesn't feel right. Like an agitation and a restlessness and I'm just not good at existing. Of course I've experienced forms of trauma but this feeling of wanting to jump out of my own skin isn't a result of that I don't think. It's just always been there and I can't explain it or seem to do anything about it. I just don't think that I'm meant to be here but if I go it will upset some people but it really upsets me to think of being around indefinitely. Not sure if this makes any sense.

I'm speculating here, but speaking from experience, autism plus trauma is one hell of a combo! (I mean that quite literally, it's a 'hell' of a combo.) On the flip side, if you get support with these sorts issues by someone competent, you may be able to turn the situation around completely. There are success stories, even if I am not one of them. :D

 

[Clut]

I'm speculating here, but speaking from experience, autism plus trauma is one hell of a combo! (I mean that quite literally, it's a 'hell' of a combo.) On the flip side, if you get support with these sorts issues by someone competent, you may be able to turn the situation around completely. There are success stories, even if I am not one of them. :D

Interesting! I'm not autistic but suspected ADHD and on a year+ long waiting list to see someone about it. If I receive that diagnosis eventually though I have no idea what help, if any, I'll get. I'm going to try to stick around I think just to see if that's the key, to save ruining my parents etc lives but God it's hard sometimes isn't it! Your description of hell feels so accurate. So sorry that you haven't got the help you need

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Humans aren't even designed for human life, at least not in a modern-day developed country. We're still the same apes that originated from around 10,000 years ago and the scarcity of the past has made us inherently greedy, tribalistic, petty, and competitively small-minded so until our actual DNA mutates/evolves into a new species that will never change on a societal level.

 

[Clut]

Humans aren't even designed for human life, at least not in a modern-day developed country. We're still the same apes that originated from around 10,000 years ago and the scarcity of the past has made us inherently greedy, tribalistic, petty, and competitively small-minded so until our actual DNA mutates/evolves into a new species that will never change on a societal level.

I've never thought about it like this! This makes so much sense thank you!

 

[FuneralCry]

Yes, I can relate. I feel as if my brain has been wired in a way that makes it hard to deal with this life. I have always been mildly depressed. I have always felt at conflict with myself and life just frustrated me. I think being autistic has caused this for me but I also have overactive thoughts and general anhedonia, I think this life is pointless as we just die anyway. My soul just doesn't belong in a human body. I think it's just the way some people are from the start, life just wasn't for them

 

[saltshaker]

I would say most people are not suited to this modern world.

 

[Clut]

Yes, I can relate. I feel as if my brain has been wired in a way that makes it hard to deal with this life. I have always been mildly depressed. I have always felt at conflict with myself and life just frustrated me. I think being autistic has caused this for me but I also have overactive thoughts and general anhedonia, I think this life is pointless as we just die anyway. My soul just doesn't belong in a human body. I think it's just the way some people are from the start, life just wasn't for them

Thanks for your reply. I'm so sorry you feel this way as well, it's helpful to know it's not just me who feels it but it's a shame there are so many of us! I really appreciate the response thank you

I would say most people are not suited to this modern world.

It seems that way doesn't it, and the more modern we get the worse it becomes for people.

 

[Mierda]

I definitely don't think I am. I'm sorry it is this way and that you have to face this.

 

[Clut]

I definitely don't think I am. I'm sorry it is this way and that you have to face this.

Thank you, I'm sorry for you too. Helps to know there are others like me, thank you

 

[Superdeterminist]

Yes. I don't think any of us were technically designed, which is really the issue. We emerged from a dumb process (evolution/nature) that doesn't think or care about us. This is why some are born with diseases, some horribly disfiguring or disabling and causing great pain, often leading to an early grave. Actually, most (all?) people have a disease of some kind, a feature of their body which makes their life more difficult in one way or another. The body is composed of trillions of interacting parts, and there's no intelligence watching over it to keep it all in perfect order, at least not one who cares enough to correct any issues. Failure/suboptimality is inevitable somewhere in the system.

 

[Luna88]

I think it's harder for some people to live than others. We are more sensitive and always looking for something that doesn't exist. We feel inner pain more intensely and perceive things differently. The head is constantly working and makes our life so exhausting and at some point unbearable. I think if one is emotionally too intelligent, life is almost unbearable. I am infinitely sad when I watch other people live and not be able to live it myself. I can't take it anymore. I've tried so hard. Again and again. Now I can not anymore. And I don't want to anymore either.

 

[Clut]

Yes. I don't think any of us were technically designed, which is really the issue. We emerged from a dumb process (evolution/nature) that doesn't think or care about us. This is why some are born with diseases, some horribly disfiguring or disabling and causing great pain, often leading to an early grave. Actually, most (all?) people have a disease of some kind, a feature of their body which makes their life more difficult in one way or another. The body is composed of trillions of interacting parts, and there's no intelligence watching over it to keep it all in perfect order, at least not one who cares enough to correct any issues. Failure/suboptimality is inevitable somewhere in the system.

This makes a lot of sense. Thank you. It seems like despite this arbitrary process, we are stuck with overly complex brains and thought processes

I think it's harder for some people to live than others. We are more sensitive and always looking for something that doesn't exist. We feel inner pain more intensely and perceive things differently. The head is constantly working and makes our life so exhausting and at some point unbearable. I think if one is emotionally too intelligent, life is almost unbearable. I am infinitely sad when I watch other people live and not be able to live it myself. I can't take it anymore. I've tried so hard. Again and again. Now I can not anymore. And I don't want to anymore either.

I'm so sorry to hear this. I can empathise. I have no idea what the best thing to do is at this stage