anything to make me better. anything.

[voidfluidoverdose]

Therapy hasn't worked. Meds haven't worked. No matter what I try it doesn't get me out of this cycle. I've considered creating some kind of experimental concoction of weed (which my parents have) and some sort of opiate (unknown where to find) to shut my brain up long enough for me to get things done. Possibly shrooms to do... something. On the weekends. Heard that can fix people. You can buy spores on the internet and grow your own I've heard. If none of this works I might hospitalize myself. I'm in last resort territory here. I'm not asking for comfort, that's short-term and won't fix anything. I need methods of fixing myself by any means neccessary.