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S

Sailfisher

F’ing A
Apr 19, 2019
282
Has anyone's family said to go ahead and go?
 
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chrijo

chrijo

done
Feb 8, 2019
329
If that's the case with anyone - run far far away from this human waste and don't believe a single word from them.
 
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F

Fadingfast

Come in peace, go in peace
May 9, 2019
106
No, however I do believe that they see my side of euthanasia for mental/ terminal illness... Especially the terminal.
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
What's left of my family understands my intentions and philosophy and says they'll respect my decision when the time comes.
 
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bacardirum

bacardirum

Experienced
May 21, 2019
233
Just remember, if family says this, it is ultimately up to you, and we will go when we decide, not them...
 
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J

Jolene40

Specialist
Oct 6, 2018
370
Not quite like that but many say I don't blame you feeling that way and accept how awful this is and why I would want it all over with
 
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maka

maka

this is for you, mi cuervito 𓇢𓆸
Apr 23, 2019
176
Whenever I tell my nmom that I hate my life, she will literally sit there and be like "there's chemicals outside, knives in the kitchen, etc. If you hate your life so much just kill yourself." It be like that sometimes.
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
Why is that harsh? Most people would give anything to have support for their desire to die.

Support for sure, but not if it sounds like indifference or impatience. "Ok, don't let the door hit you in the butt on your way out" is a little chilly.

@maka , that sounds awful. Is it supposed to be some version of "tough love" or something? I had a grandmother who thought it was clever to say things like that. It isn't. It's just mean.
 
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Alchemist

Alchemist

Warlock
Apr 3, 2019
709
Yeah, one time my mother told me that if I do it, I'd better do it somewhere else so I don't be an inconvenience at home.
 
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D

Deleted member 1768

Enlightened
Aug 15, 2018
1,107
Support for sure, but not if it sounds like indifference or impatience. "Ok, don't let the door hit you in the butt on your way out" is a little chilly.

@maka , that sounds awful. Is it supposed to be some version of "tough love" or something? I had a grandmother who thought it was clever to say things like that. It isn't. It's just mean.
Have to agree with you when comes to disdain, but I would give almost anything to have a family member hear me out...
 
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Milly Fenn

Milly Fenn

Member
May 5, 2019
7
They think suicide is stupid, but my mom angrily told me to just go ahead and do it when I was being an inconsiderate prick
 
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D

Deleted member 1768

Enlightened
Aug 15, 2018
1,107
They think suicide is stupid, but my mom angrily told me to just go ahead and do it when I was being an inconsiderate prick
I am sorry Milly. That is hard. The thing about anger? We usually say things we do not mean and often regret.
 
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Marz

Marz

À PEU PRÈS
Aug 3, 2018
170
My father once snapped during one of his drunken rage rampages and he threatened me with a knife he'd found under my mattress that I used to self harm after he flipped up the mattress with me on it and pushed me against the wall -I still wonder how the fuck he managed to do that- and he asked me if I wanted to die and that I could simply go and take the rat poison underneath the sink or he could just stab me if I wanted to die so much. I was just 13 so you can imagine the psychological damage that gave me. Nowadays he'd say he'd never want me to do such a thing but then, does he really? I feel like he was revealing his darkest thoughts when his alcoholism was at his worst and he would have these violent outburts- he'd say the meanest shit and it's hard not to think he didn't mean any of it.
 
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Alchemist

Alchemist

Warlock
Apr 3, 2019
709
My father once snapped during one of his drunken rage rampages and he threatened me with a knife he'd found under my mattress that I used to self harm after he flipped up the mattress with me on it and pushed me against the wall -I still wonder how the fuck he managed to do that- and he asked me if I wanted to die and that I could simply go and take the rat poison underneath the sink or he could just stab me if I wanted to die so much. I was just 13 so you can imagine the psychological damage that gave me. Nowadays he'd say he'd never want me to do such a thing but then, does he really? I feel like he was revealing his darkest thoughts when his alcoholism was at his worst and he would have these violent outburts- he'd say the meanest shit and it's hard not to think he didn't mean any of it.
Glad to see you alive! How are your plans coming up?

And your dad is a big knucklehead with poo poo on his heart.
 
Marz

Marz

À PEU PRÈS
Aug 3, 2018
170
Glad to see you alive! How are your plans coming up?

And your dad is a big knucklehead with poo poo on his heart.

My plans got screwed over anyway. I'll have to start from scratch in another country and so far if it goes south I'll jump off a bulding.
 
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LastFlowers

LastFlowers

the haru that can read
Apr 27, 2019
2,170
In one form or another, yes.
Apparently me being open about the degree to which I am suffering means I can be asked things like "Well why haven't you then, why haven't you. You keep saying that so why aren't you doing it?"
Well needless to say, I no longer speak to that person about how certain things in my life make me want to die.
I didn't really say it much to that person specifically in the first place, more about my suffering and less about suicide. Because I'm still begrudgingly dependent on them. And yet still-

The thing is, if you actually say it to people, you risk that type of response eventually. Even the people who have it so good in life, like to pity themselves. It's the human condition, and when they're in that mood, suddenly you are just a frustration. A boy crying wolf.

So I try not to outright say it to anyone but my mother. And even then, it's only out of desperation and to warn her. Everyone always says how "they wish they knew", well I'm telling you and you don't want to hear it.
When the day actually comes, no one will be told or warned of a damn thing.
 
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Alchemist

Alchemist

Warlock
Apr 3, 2019
709
My plans got screwed over anyway. I'll have to start from scratch in another country and so far if it goes south I'll jump off a bulding.
Have you considered Mexico? Supposedly (not being able to confirm so far) getting N is easy.
 
azucaramargo

azucaramargo

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2018
1,010
Has anyone's family said to go ahead and go?
My family hasn't SAID that outright, but I know they'd be relieved (minus the inconvenience of having to dispose of my body).
 
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GeorgeJL

GeorgeJL

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2019
1,621
None of them have said that, but they do seem to understand that I want to go out in a dignified manner in my own timing. Meaning they respect my decision as long as I don't do it unless my time is up or I must exit life early.
 
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Meretlein

Meretlein

Moderator
Feb 15, 2019
1,199
Only when they're mad at me.
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
My father once snapped during one of his drunken rage rampages and he threatened me with a knife he'd found under my mattress that I used to self harm after he flipped up the mattress with me on it and pushed me against the wall -I still wonder how the fuck he managed to do that- and he asked me if I wanted to die and that I could simply go and take the rat poison underneath the sink or he could just stab me if I wanted to die so much. I was just 13 so you can imagine the psychological damage that gave me. Nowadays he'd say he'd never want me to do such a thing but then, does he really? I feel like he was revealing his darkest thoughts when his alcoholism was at his worst and he would have these violent outburts- he'd say the meanest shit and it's hard not to think he didn't mean any of it.

That's a terrible degree of violence, @Marz - I'm sorry. Your father's anger and frustration could be genuine without being directed at the real source, you know? You were a child, so much "safer" to confront than his own failings that contributed to a situation he hated and didn't know how to fix. Any referee would call foul. I call foul!
 
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ExitTheDay

ExitTheDay

We fight to live or live to die
May 26, 2019
336
This would be my family right here but they are very different and are like most people - they only give a shit when the damage has been done, and that's why when I finally get my life together I'm never fucking speaking to anyone of them again... except my mother
 
Milly Fenn

Milly Fenn

Member
May 5, 2019
7
I am sorry Milly. That is hard. The thing about anger? We usually say things we do not mean and often regret.

I'm sure they mean well but it came out of the blue and it definitely hurt. Fortunately it has been quite a while since then. Still have thoughts about ctb but I'm being more lowkey about it now
 
beatenghost

beatenghost

Member
May 26, 2019
40
Yes. My mother flat out told me that it would be preferable if I committed suicide than doing what I did (dropping out of uni after failed suicide attempt.) I don't consider this "support" for my desire to die. It's just another manifestation of the pain that's making me want to die in the first place. No, she didn't say this out of anger. She said this multiple times in very calm and sincere ways. I'm currently disowned by my entire family, my name is not even allowed to be said in the house. I know for a fact if I committed suicide my mother would change that. Cry about how much she loved me and soak up all the attention and sympathy she'd get. How special she'd be to have a dead daughter who killed herself.
 
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Worndown

Worndown

Illuminated
Mar 21, 2019
3,663
This world us filled with selfish people. Too bad you were born into a family of them.
 
Tabbyql

Tabbyql

Chronic people pleaser
Mar 13, 2019
282
They don't say it out right, but their actions/lack of say it all.
 
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