Anyone who's planning on jumping or using a gun, how do you plan to beat the survival instinct?

[Tyuiop]

Jumping seems easier to me than hanging... There is that thing called the call of the void, and for me it's especially strong. I plan to rent an apartment somewhere high and jump instantly when I feel like it. You can also die from a heart attack before you hit ground.

 

[Sanguinius]

Probably with benzodiazepines? They should calm down...
I think alcohol isn't a good idea for jumping, it calms the muscles, and makes you therefore probably surviving, as far as I know.

I plan to jump off a 200m (~650 feet) tall bridge with hard surface below... There's a high fence, the net is called called "webnet". It's a 1,5 mm diameter stainless steel cable. I think it is able to cut through with a cutting plier like this:
https://www.obi.de/zangen/lux-drahtschere-190-mm

 

[ChemicallyCalm]

I'm planning to jump off beachy head with someone. I think having someone there may help. I'll also drink if I really need to

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Survival instinct is a bitch. I've had a few brushes with death and only if I had succumbed back then I wouldn't be alive and suffering now. My first close to death experience was when I nearly drowned at 5 years old. How I wish I hadn't fought to stay alive that day.

Nowadays, I watch a lot of suicide videos. Mainly people hanging themselves and many of them make it look so easy. If a 12-year-old can hang herself, then why can't I? I'm pretty much desensitized to death videos and photos now. Even the video of the child hanging herself didn't make me bat an eyelid.

Also, last year my second cousin killed himself and I didn't feel anything upon hearing the news. In fact, today it's the 1-year anniversary. I'd never choose his method (train) but I just feel envy when people off themselves properly. I hope I manage to overcome the survival instinct when the time comes soon.

 

[furax53]

the cliffs of etretats are ah one to the places of the amide in France for those who can not go to uk to go ah beachy head


il y a ah miminun 2 suicide par mois ah etretat

 

[Stealth]

I am ready to go, and not afraid of death. However for the gun method, the thought of instantly going from full consciousness to death really screws with me. Maybe it's my crippling anxiety. Jumping is my current planned method, and it's equally scary to think that my survival instinct will probably make me regret the moment i jump, and that i will be horrified on my way down. What should i even do? fk.

I used a different method PS twice I was found the first time, and the belt broke the second time and I woke up in the floor. I didnt have an issue with SI I just did it and didnt think twice about it. I planned for a while and then just did it. I used Valium the first time to help if that helps at all?

 

[Sisterfister]

I am ready to go, and not afraid of death. However for the gun method, the thought of instantly going from full consciousness to death really screws with me. Maybe it's my crippling anxiety. Jumping is my current planned method, and it's equally scary to think that my survival instinct will probably make me regret the moment i jump, and that i will be horrified on my way down. What should i even do? fk.

Don't jump into water it's dumb. And with the gun you shoot for the back of the head

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

Where did u see that??

Not this week, it was from a few months ago, and the total they found went up to around 10 if sorrounding cliffs are included. Yet the estimate of people dying at the cliff stays at 20 a year. I highly doubt that low estimate. I think officials purposely under report the number to not encourage people. 10 bodies found in a span of a week is too much to cover up.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

Survival instinct is a bitch. I've had a few brushes with death and only if I had succumbed back then I wouldn't be alive and suffering now. My first close to death experience was when I nearly drowned at 5 years old. How I wish I hadn't fought to stay alive that day.

Nowadays, I watch a lot of suicide videos. Mainly people hanging themselves and many of them make it look so easy. If a 12-year-old can hang herself, then why can't I? I'm pretty much desensitized to death videos and photos now. Even the video of the child hanging herself didn't make me bat an eyelid.

Also, last year my second cousin killed himself and I didn't feel anything upon hearing the news. In fact, today it's the 1-year anniversary. I'd never choose his method (train) but I just feel envy when people off themselves properly. I hope I manage to overcome the survival instinct when the time comes soon.

Hey I almost drowned when I was a kid too, around age 3 or 4 I think. This happened because the babysitters of the daycare didnt give a shit about me... People kept telling me that there was a reason I didn't die that day, and yes now I know why. I needed to suffer more.

I saw that little girl hanging video. Some kids are braver than me...

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

Don't jump into water it's dumb. And with the gun you shoot for the back of the head

Here in NYC, a gun is hard to come by. Idk where to get one...

 

[Burned out]

I attempted earlier this year. Method was 15 grams of tylenol. I suppose having a lethal amount of pills in your body might be similar to having jumped in some circumstances (not all suicide jumps are equal). It's not scary until several minutes after you've done the act. As I was swallowing the pills, I was only focused on finishing the act. It took at least 15 seconds to down them all. I had counted them out before hand, too. On that day, I had taken a hot shower, and without hesitation, I began swallowing them. I had planned on waiting until I felt my anxiety was low enough to swallow the pills, but I ended up doing so impulsively. It was shockingly easy.

Once you've attempted suicide (where death was a real possibility), the fear of trying again is much lower or not there.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

I attempted earlier this year. Method was 15 grams of tylenol. I suppose having a lethal amount of pills in your body might be similar to having jumped in some circumstances (not all suicide jumps are equal). It's not scary until several minutes after you've done the act. As I was swallowing the pills, I was only focused on finishing the act. It took at least 15 seconds to down them all. I had counted them out before hand, too. On that day, I had taken a hot shower, and without hesitation, I began swallowing them. I had planned on waiting until I felt my anxiety was low enough to swallow the pills, but I ended up doing so impulsively. It was shockingly easy.

Once you've attempted suicide (where death was a real possibility), the fear of trying again is much lower or not there.

I have attempted before by overdosing as well. 4 years ago by two bottles of sleeping pills, and it was impulsive as well. I was young and really thought it was enough to kill me, but was found and rushed to hospital. I wasn't scared at all because i was so enraged, and my adrenaline was pumping. I just want to somehow recreate that impulsive rage again.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

sorry, i don't know.... all i know is that there was no suicide fence on the north side of the GWB. I guess if you're determined you can jump from the Northside, not sure if it's more accessible on the upper or lower lanes.

GWB is not worth it. I did some research, by watching recent videos of GWB crossing on youtube, and there are fencing between car lanes and the closed (but unfenced) pedestrian walkway on the North side. The South side fencing is super tall and encloses the whole pedestrian walkway. To jump from this bridge, you would need some good physical skills.

 

[TAW122]

GWB is not worth it. I did some research, by watching recent videos of GWB crossing on youtube, and there are fencing between car lanes and the closed (but unfenced) pedestrian walkway on the North side. The South side fencing is super tall and encloses the whole pedestrian walkway. To jump from this bridge, you would need some good physical skills.

I agree. The GWB has been suicide-proofed by a bunch of anti-suicide cunts who think they are holier than thou and have such massive hero-complexes. Also, there are regular patrols (similar to the GGB in California) that stop people from scaling, let alone jumping.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

I agree. The GWB has been suicide-proofed by a bunch of anti-suicide cunts who think they are holier than thou and have such massive hero-complexes. Also, there are regular patrols (similar to the GGB in California) that stop people from scaling, let alone jumping.

That really pisses me off man... GWB is in such a beautiful spot, and that's one of the reasons it attracts people to it. These anti suicide people are so afraid of having their happy little realities to be ruined by jumpers... Like people have been trying to kill themselves forever on this bridge, but for whatever reason this generation of people suddenly can't accept it anymore? WTF?

 

[Smilla]

I met someone on the old SS Reddit sub and he was planning on using a gun—for years he would carry it off into the desert at his planned spot and hold it while contemplating his death. Must have been torture for him.

Finally he was able to secure N and within weeks after acquiring it he CTB.

He said he "didn't want to blow his consciousness away in an instant", and in the short time I got to know him I was a bit surprised that he was planning on using a gun because he seemed such a gentle soul and couldn't imagine him using such a violent method. Nothing against ctb using a gun or jumping but I think everyone deserves a peaceful death and shooting yourself in the head is far removed from any definition of peaceful as I see it.

Any way you can attempt to get N or SN?

Certainly I'd use a gun before I'd attempt jumping—the terror on the way down isn't something I'd want to experience but I can also see why it would appeal to some—jumping into the abyss, flying down into it as the forces of gravity take hold.

 

[Phade]

I'm working on getting around survival instincts for the shotgun I've purchased. I've had a number of dry runs but only one close attempt and it was recent. I would have pushed forward further but my fiancé came home. I feel I wasn't close enough to the edge but depending on her actions I would have been there I'm pretty sure.

I'd prefer N or whatever people talk about here and would do it immediately. I have the money and zero isssues purchasing it this minute but don't have the knowledge to do it. That would make me instantly happy honestly to go that way but with no real knowledge I might have to wait until things are pretty bleak and go with a shotgun.

 

[OkTotti]

I'm working on getting around survival instincts for the shotgun I've purchased. I've had a number of dry runs but only one close attempt and it was recent. I would have pushed forward further but my fiancé came home. I feel I wasn't close enough to the edge but depending on her actions I would have been there I'm pretty sure.

I'd prefer N or whatever people talk about here and would do it immediately. I have the money and zero isssues purchasing it this minute but don't have the knowledge to do it. That would make me instantly happy honestly to go that way but with no real knowledge I might have to wait until things are pretty bleak and go with a shotgun.

You still want to CTB even though you have a fiance? Your choices are your own, but i find that really curious. You need to goto the resources section on this forum and download the Peaceful Pill Handbook. The email address is in the 'Availability' chapter... and make sure to read up on the Megathread Obtaining N from A. (or something like that)

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

I met someone on the old SS Reddit sub and he was planning on using a gun—for years he would carry it off into the desert at his planned spot and hold it while contemplating his death. Must have been torture for him.

Finally he was able to secure N and within weeks after acquiring it he CTB.

He said he "didn't want to blow his consciousness away in an instant", and in the short time I got to know him I was a bit surprised that he was planning on using a gun because he seemed such a gentle soul and couldn't imagine him using such a violent method. Nothing against ctb using a gun or jumping but I think everyone deserves a peaceful death and shooting yourself in the head is far removed from any definition of peaceful as I see it.

Any way you can attempt to get N or SN?

Certainly I'd use a gun before I'd attempt jumping—the terror on the way down isn't something I'd want to experience but I can also see why it would appeal to some—jumping into the abyss, flying down into it as the forces of gravity take hold.

I don't know anything about N and SN, or how to get them. I am trying to learn tho, but it's so hard to concrete this week... All i can think of is jump, and all the bullshit in my life.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

I'm working on getting around survival instincts for the shotgun I've purchased. I've had a number of dry runs but only one close attempt and it was recent. I would have pushed forward further but my fiancé came home. I feel I wasn't close enough to the edge but depending on her actions I would have been there I'm pretty sure.

I'd prefer N or whatever people talk about here and would do it immediately. I have the money and zero isssues purchasing it this minute but don't have the knowledge to do it. That would make me instantly happy honestly to go that way but with no real knowledge I might have to wait until things are pretty bleak and go with a shotgun.

Same situation with the N and SN. I only learned what these terms mean today, and still have no clue on to acquire them or the proper procedure. I'm learning tho. I might just rage and drive over to the bridge, but i might get scared and not jump. That's my nightmare. I don't wanna get "rescued" on the ledge, and get committed to a psych ward...

 

[OkTotti]

Same situation with the N and SN. I only learned what these terms mean today, and still have no clue on to acquire them or the proper procedure. I'm learning tho. I might just rage and drive over to the bridge, but i might get scared and not jump. That's my nightmare. I don't wanna get "rescued" on the ledge, and get committed to a psych ward...

You won't be an expert from 1 day. It's a process of learning on this forum and reading the Peaceful Pill Handbook. SN is lot cheaper and easier to get than N. If you have doubts with the Bridge jumping, don't do it. You'll be all over the TV news and it will be on the internet videos forever.....

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

You won't be an expert from 1 day. It's a process of learning on this forum and reading the Peaceful Pill Handbook. SN is lot cheaper and easier to get than N. If you have doubts with the Bridge jumping, don't do it. You'll be all over the TV news and it will be on the internet videos forever.....

I don't mind any of that because i'll be dead. I am just scared of me getting arrested because i was too scared to jump... I am just hoping of finding a partner to do this with. That would make it much more bearable.

 

[OkTotti]

I don't mind any of that because i'll be dead. I am just scared of me getting arrested because i was too scared to jump... I am just hoping of finding a partner to do this with. That would make it much more bearable.

have you posted in the partners thread? highly unlikely you'd find a partner but worth a shot... there a few people in the nyc area.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

have you posted in the partners thread? highly unlikely you'd find a partner but worth a shot... there a few people in the nyc area.

Yes i have, 3 times already. I met up with a guy the first time, but he backed out of it. Chatting with another two people right now, but they don't seem very committed atm...

 

[OkTotti]

finding a real life partner is going to be really hard....probably not going to happen even though we all think we want to CTB, partners back out, get cold feet, get worried that the partner might not be someone who they say they are.....

 

[Phade]

You still want to CTB even though you have a fiance? Your choices are your own, but i find that really curious. You need to goto the resources section on this forum and download the Peaceful Pill Handbook. The email address is in the 'Availability' chapter... and make sure to read up on the Megathread Obtaining N from A. (or something like that)

She ("probably") has borderline personality disorder like myself and was just released from cutting an artery in her ankle and has an 8 year old. She's pretty verbally abusive amongst other things and will not seek treatment. That coupled with my diagnosed borderline personality disorder leave me crippled and at 32 I'm not starting over again. I just got out of a 17 year marriage that started when I was 15 and she was 25 with two kids. My parents meant well but didn't parent well it seems.

With all of the research needed I just will probably man up with the shotgun eventually. I don't find it violent, just need to be in that frame of mind which doesn't take long. Usually a week or two.

 

[ExitTheDay]

Shoot myself while standing on the edge of a cliff, that way if the gun blast doesn't kill me I will fall backwards off of the cliff and descend down then my body comes in contact with the ground, but if that didn't kill me, Oh well ... geuss I'm going to bleed to death while suffering from hundereds of shattered bones...

 

[Weems]

I am ready to go, and not afraid of death. However for the gun method, the thought of instantly going from full consciousness to death really screws with me.

Yeah. I know I'm just fooling myself when I fantasize about any kind of sudden/violent death or even hanging. I need to go to sleep, just like any other night, but tomorrow's cancelled.

 

[LastFlowers]

I feel like these methods are rather quick, and for me the quicker the better for the very same reason, SI.
If I drink something or take something, or fumble with a rope, I'm going to panic.
I think with a gun or jumping, its "before" the actual act that takes forever.
Once you pull the trigger or step off, there's little to no time to think anymore about it.

You still want to CTB even though you have a fiance? Your choices are your own, but i find that really curious. You need to goto the resources section on this forum and download the Peaceful Pill Handbook. The email address is in the 'Availability' chapter... and make sure to read up on the Megathread Obtaining N from A. (or something like that)

I don't think having a fiancé would be a deterrent for anyone suffering enough to commit suicide.

Unless the reason you are is because you don't have one and want one.

 

[GeorgeJL]

I am not convinced that shooting yourself or jumping is painless because there will be cells left with oxygen, blood, and neurotransmitters. Pain is not only processed by a module in the brain but also pain is localized in each cell.

What It's Like to Get Shot in the Head
"Did you feel pain? Oh yeah. A lot of pain."
[URL="http://www.vice.com/en_us/article/gqm4yq/what-its-like-to-get-shot-in-the-head[/URL]"]www.vice.com/en_us/article/gqm4yq/what-its-like-to-get-shot-in-the-head[/URL]