Anyone suffering from extreme anxiety and depression?

[nosoul]

Making me want to ctb soon, I'm so emotionally dead, struggling to maintain function.

I'm really hurting but also totally numb.

What to do?

I'm tempted to jump and leave everything behind, I can't stand this existence.

I fear going to hell because I've not done any good except destroy myself.

I can't even watch after dogs:(

 

[outrider567]

'Emotionally dead' yeah that's me too

 

[Covalite]

I can defintly relate. I have extreme anxiety so much so i cant go out into public without panic attacks. Like i cant function without some one with me i know which is a very short list and all of them are more of professial relationships due to the fact they are etheir county workers or a houseing program staff that help me pay rent and stuff. So I can get grocires and such but only in a buddy system and also i cant be out for very long. As for deppression I have been dealing with that for at least 12 years and it has only gotten worse. The only reason i even get out of bed in the mornings on bad days is just to feed my fish.. So ya i totally feel you. Also sorry for the info dump I just wana let you know your not alone with crippling anxiety.

 

[NeedCourage]

I can relate so much to this. I'm sorry you're going through this, anxiety and depression are both awful to deal with.

 

[nosoul]

But it's not easy to ctb, both living and ctb tough to comprehend right now

 

[wanttodie]

yes me that way i want to end my life

 

[Unending]

Extreme is a fitting word for it. It's a very dark psychology that I'm stuck with.

 

[Buddha.chris]

It's hard struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts it makes me want to jump out my skin everyday it's a never ending battle that always when find a way to drain you especially if the depression is severe

 

[00nobody00]

Yes. I just entered my late 30's and cannot cope with the fact that I have not really accomplished anything really meaningful in my life and I dwell too much on my failures every day. I have not really had a bad life, but I just failed at every opportunity that has presented itself to me and not that I am getting older, opportunities are not as plentiful as they were when you are younger. I am becoming very resentful and bitter that I am not one of those people who found their passion at a young age and stuck with it for years and made a career out of it, whatever it may be. Last night I watched a Soft White Underbelly interview on youtube of this fella who is a legendary hacker with a very awesome and inspirational life story. It was a very cool story and a cool life he has lived, but it really messed me up and made me envious. All I thought of all day today while at my meaningless job driving my stupid forklift around is how I have wasted and continue to waste with ONE life that has been given to me and how I am a waste of talent. Now I am depressed and want to die so I can spare myself of living the rest of my life full of regrets, despair, resentment, and dying old and alone