Discussion Anyone struggled with homosexuality?

[Baskol1]

I have accepted my homosexuality Now, but in the past i hated myself for being gay and liking guys, it even made me suicidal. Did anyone too struggled with their homosexuality? Did you ever accept it?

 

[Black_Knight]

Sort of. When I was younger I didn't want to accept it not because I thought it was immoral or that it made me defective (if anything it was the opposite, as an antinatalist since before I knew there was a word for it the fact that I can't accidentally reproduce is a relief and a happy coincidence) but because I knew it would be very inconvenient. How it really affected me was by making me feel unlovable and making me realize how mechanical love really is. Knowing that 95% of the people you're interested in will never be interested in you, and would probably be disgusted by you, for something as superficial as your sex, and knowing that your own bias towards their sex is equally as superficial, makes sex (gender, the act of sex, anything related to either of those things) seem like a joke and a cruel artificial constraint (of which there are many in life) on love.

 

[262653]

I find a certain mixture of feminine and masculine traits to be sexually attractive, a mixture that most people rarely get to see in everyday life, me included. I was quite surprised to experience my first attraction, to a tangible human body... It was so bizarre, I looked at her like at delicious piece of well-baked and well-seasoned meat.. I can count the amount of unique tangible bodies I was attracted to by the fingers of my hands, without repeating.

While I haven't been drawn towards guys in real life, I've got to see a few drawn hotties on DeviantArt. Is that acceptant enough? I'd try to avoid ascribing labels to myself and others. It's an attraction towards people with certain traits that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with boobs or biceps or dicks or cunts.

 

[Black_Knight]

I find a certain mixture of feminine and masculine traits to be sexually attractive, a mixture that most people rarely get to see in everyday life, me included.

I feel this. People who you can kind of tell are genetic women, but with a sort of masculine countenance that makes them come off as male-brained-ish and that have a masculine but still refined style of dress really light a fire in my heart. I get this feeling where they're shaping themselves instead of being shaped by their bodies and that level of self-control and actualization, whether conscious or not, is really hot. I don't feel the same way about the opposite (feminine guys). But for me when it comes to raw animal attraction it's all about those hypermasculine muscles. Genitals don't really factor in.

 

[burnedCookie]

in my teens yes, took me quite some time to figure out what I thought was wrong with me, I was almost disgusted by my feelings
then I finally tried it, liked it, and something changed, there was nothing wrong with me after all.
since that day I don't care about what people think, that's one of the only thing about myself I really like

I like both girls and boys so it opened a lot of new doors :)

 

[Tabbyql]

I was completely unaware, I didn't understand why I was so drawn to these beautiful singers. I thought it was just more of a "I wanna look like them/be them kind of thing" I couldn't understand why I wasn't bothered by boys, like all my female friends were. Then when I had my 1st proper bf at 18 (I felt I had to, so I could seem "normal"), I realised I find girls attractive. So for a few years I identified as bisexual. But I think that I might be gay. My religious "mother" found out im bisexual when my so called brother outed me to everyone he could. So she doesn't bother with me at all.

 

[YukiFox]

Surely. I suspect about my homosexuality since 14 years old, but I'm from a very conservative family, so I didn't have the courage to discuss openly from a close relative. At college I accepted myself a little more, but I chicken out a couple of years and return to church to try to overcome. Now I accept my sexual desire for men (cis and trans, whatever).
Nevertheless, I didn't have a successful relationship. I never get a boyfriend more than one year. And sex seemed fine in theory, but in practice I felt ashamed in best situations, sad and regret in most intercourses.
Sure, feel ashamed about being gay triggered my suicidal ideations but it wasn't the main reason to want to die.
In recent months I decided to become trans / non binary woman in the future but that's another story.

 

[Ch92921]

Sexual orientation is biological. I guess biological will very progress in the 21. century. Mostly genomic research and neuroscience.

When I hit puberty the biochemistry of my body totally went crazy. I looked liked a girl, sounded like girl, no interest in sports.

I also got social phobia for no reason. This is strange for boy, because phobias and anxiety is more something what the female gender suffers.

For the proof that my limbic system has some neurchemical disturbance(inborn). Could be genetic genetic caused.

 

[come to dust]

I struggle in the sense that people of the same gender are not attracted to me, and i do not fit the requirements for conventional attractiveness for gay men today

 

[Snake of Eden]

I struggle with it too. I am from a conservative family. At one point i tried to accept it and live it but that didnt bring me any happiness. I am now at the point which I am indifferent to it. I realized it is part of me that I can never probably change but I choose to not do anything with it. It is just part of who I am but I want it to remain dormant

I struggle in the sense that people of the same gender are not attracted to me, and i do not fit the requirements for conventional attractiveness for gay men today

I struggle from the same things. Have been a loser even at it

 

[Pure]

Bisexual here....i come from a conservative culture although my family isn't outwardly homophobic. I don't know if I could handle the social stigma of marrying a woman if we fell in love.

I wish I could be just straight or gay. Dual attraction is very overrated and just makes me feel 1000x worse about myself knowing that neither of the sexes like me and I've found zero success with putting myself out and trying to date.

 

[Ch92921]

I am total faxxot. Biological flaw!

I struggle in the sense that people of the same gender are not attracted to me, and i do not fit the requirements for conventional attractiveness for gay men today

Same problem for me.