Anyone else utterly disgusted with their bodies?

[ineed2die]

Every time I look at myself in the mirror I'm disgusted that the freak I am. I am so fucking ugly. I don't even want anyone to love me or care about me because I despise myself.
Honestly, the people who don't hate me outright I look at with suspicion, because I am so detestable from the get-go.

 

[Greyhawk]

I often feel like a monster created by H.P. Lovecraft.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Yeah, I get it. I used to have times when looking at my body was enough to make me want to cry, though lately, I've been feeling a bit more neutral when looking at it.

 

[Eudaimonic]

Yes, I am really disgusted by mine and I can't wait to be free of it

 

[Prism]

Not so much my body, but I hate my face now. I don't even want to look at it in the mirror anymore. Makes me wish wearing a mask was still commonplace.

 

[Overwhelmed52]

Oh yeah, I especially hate having to do any kind of video calls. I can kind of fool myself when looking in the mirror at home and think I don't look too bad (I keep the light low, etc.), but the camera doesn't lie and I look so awful. From people's reactions, I feel that they are think the same and it totally undermines my confidence. I also feel like the way I look does not at all reflect who I am on the inside, so it's always jarring when I see what I look like.

 

[J&L383]

Not so much my body, but I hate my face now. I don't even want to look at it in the mirror anymore. Makes me wish wearing a mask was still commonplace.

Thank you, Halloween

 

[grungy自殺]

I am so unfit in a body like this .

Considering that i would know most people that are like the way i am (in looks) would succeed so well in social settings .

And i feel shame on the fact that i wasn't been at least born into a decent alright looking body that doesn't seem to be a type that would
give people an impression that i would be outgoing and crap .

 

[fishlover]

i hate my body, and my face too. i hope to one day get some plastic surgery if i can live long enough. for now im just trying to lose more weight and get toned, get rid of my acne etc. sometimes i wonder why i even bother trying to improve myself, but something within me cant bear to not at least attempt to look decent in my life time. i crave to be called pretty and cute. it might be a losing battle but i cant help it.

 

[LostLily]

Not just my body but my face too. I keep having aches and pains in my back, neck, tendonitis and my tinnitus is flaring up again. My body feel like it belongs to sometime 30 years older than it really is

 

[Gangrel]

When i look in the mirror i think "i wish everything about you was different, nothing about this is appealing in any fucking way shape or form". If a fucking witch was like "bring me the heart of a virgin to change you into literally anything else" i would be commiting murder that day lol

 

[hardcorebisnis]

yeah, i wish i was skinny again, idk why its so hard for me to just eat less and eat the right macros, i've done it before, it's all my fault. no one gets it either because i'm a healthy bmi but i KNOW i can look better at a much lower weight.

 

[Haematemesis]

I HATE MY BODY
Short af and weak
Greasy skin and hair
Myopia
Scoliosis
Auto-immune diseases which makes me wanna kill myself
Asymmetrical face
Little hands that you would assume they belong to a child
Untidy facial hair
Fcked up teeth that requires 50 surgeries to fix
Low condition which I made worse with smoking
Huge ass lips
Huge ass nose
Ugly smile
No jawline
Wavy hair which is impossible to brush
Micropenis

 

[Warkman1]

Mu relationship with myself physically has deteriorated as my general feelings of self loathing have increased. I think i feel disdain for my personality primarliy but that spills over to how i see myself physically also i guess. I just remember the person i was 10-12 years agao and feel like I've lost a friend if that makes any sense

 

[redmunk]

Yes I relate. I have a very long chin and jutts a lot from the side (think similar to Quentin Tarantino) . I am absolutely disgusted by it. And to make things worse I have very narrow mouth with big lips. It makes me vomit when I look back at pictures of myself. I am so ugly

 

[FuneralCry]

Yes it really is just so horrible, what I find horrific is how there is no limit as to how much agony it can cause, to me human existence really is the most torturous, futile abomination and the fact that I was forced into this existence of pointless suffering will always be the most terrible tragedy to me. I'd always prefer to not exist than be enslaved in this existence just destined to decay, I really would never wish to be conscious of any of this at all and the fact that one can potentially suffer for so long just to die tortured by old age is just so terrifying and unbearable to me, I'd never wish for any of this. I'll always see existence as the most terrible mistake, I only hope to not exist, I just want to never suffer ever again, I'll only be at peace once I'm no longer burdened with this cruel existence, to me existing really is just only suffering.

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

I'm disgusted with my body not out of low self-esteem, but because it never has my best interests in mind, only its own selfish motives; no matter how much suffering I'm in, my body doesn't care -- its only goal is to blindly push through and survive, regardless of the cost.

I just remember the person i was 10-12 years agao and feel like I've lost a friend if that makes any sense

I know what you mean. I often feel in mourning over the loss of the person I once was.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Yes but only because my body is just a product of chemistry which has been designed to preserve my life for as long as possible despite that going against my rational desire to no longer be.

 

[mayayo]

I distinctly remember staring at myself in the mirror when I was eleven and crying my eyes out. Not much has changed nowadays, but I look in the mirror a lot less.

 

[ShatteredSerenity]

I hate how much weight I've been gaining since my severe depression started. The worst part of my body is my brain, bipolar disorder has ruined my life.

 

[J&L383]

I distinctly remember staring at myself in the mirror when I was eleven and crying my eyes out. Not much has changed nowadays, but I look in the mirror a lot less.

Haven't cleaned my mirror in ages.

 

[Unhumanly.]

It's almost like a meat bag in the process of rotting

 

[softlyn]

I don't remember much from back then but I do recall being in elementary and praying with my entire heart that I would wake up female

Life's just a bonus round...

 

[depressedcappuccino]

I've always been treated like an ugly duckling, and what's really killing me is how it's like life is mocking me, I don't look super ugly but a few bad features really ruin my face and displace whatever decent features I have. I hope that I can get enough surgery soon while I'm still young so that I can live the rest of my 20's confident and lively, not like the npc I am now. I can't bear the thought of looking like the way I am now for the rest of my life and will probably off myself if I can't change it in a relative timespan.

 

[iamrealandyouarenot]

It's not even about other people. I'm not worried about being lonely. I'm not lonely. I just hate to see myself looking back at me in a mirror.

 

[wanttodie]

yes Not just my body but my face too.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yes, many visible aspects of my body I feel ashamed of. I also don't like the biological side of it. Periods are disgusting, defecating is disgusting.

I suppose I see biological entities as pretty incredible in one way but, not when they go wrong and, not when it hurts when they go wrong.

I suppose I feel kind of torn when it comes to physical looks. On the one hand, I hate it that we're held to beauty standards. Both men and women. We're taught to focus on and hate all our imperfections- and hopefully, buy some overpriced product to 'fix' them. So, I suppose a part of me also tries to reject that.

I suppose it's inevitable that either sex are more attracted to certain things. We can't exactly blame either gender for that or if we don't fit that model. Still, I suppose I'm more resigned to being alone now. I kind of embrace it too. So, that need to impress others, especially men, has also largely gone now (thankfully.)

 

[idelttoilfsadness21]

I never liked how I looked… there was one time or a few, but I always hated how I looked… I hated my very existence in this body, I hated how I would feel living as this, the stares, the gossips, the looks, the perception, the reality, and even worse, the fact that it isn't real to begin with, but a decaying feeling of nothingness, yet I am placed as this monster… I have always wanted more and I cried having to put so much pressure on myself because there's no way I can fix what's broken and why I hate living in this world because I had hopes, but there's no true way to fix this world, as it's the ugly monster, not me. With me, I am just the reality of pin and suffering, and do I like how I was born? No and yes, but would I wished to be reborn as it if it were a better world? No!! Especially my body I was born with that makes me feel feminine, having gaining weight on it for many years, it's just a no with what I've gone through… I rather have a better body and world and face

 

[CogitoMori]

Well I'm trans, so yeah. But I'm also just kind of disappointed about having a body in general. The whole thing takes too much work just to never stay clean. Having a physical body is just a million chores and I hate it.

 

[billie]

the only things i like about myself are my green eyes and my long brown hair