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Kramer

Kramer

Nervous wreck
Oct 27, 2020
1,398
It wasnt until a few months ago that I woke up in a sense after a decade and suddenly desired a social life, but it can't happen given how bad my illnesses have progressed. Cruel
 
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x~Sophia~x

x~Sophia~x

Always give 100% - unless you’re donating blood.
Sep 10, 2020
1,360
It wasnt until a few months ago that I woke up in a sense after a decade and suddenly desired a social life, but it can't happen given how bad my illnesses have progressed. Cruel

Have you had any help from your mental health team, or did you allow your illnesses to progress without any help?
 
Kramer

Kramer

Nervous wreck
Oct 27, 2020
1,398
Have you had any help from your mental health team, or did you allow your illnesses to progress without any help?
I've been to many therapists, which have all been inadequate. I've been on all the meds for my psych problems. None helped.
 
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x~Sophia~x

x~Sophia~x

Always give 100% - unless you’re donating blood.
Sep 10, 2020
1,360
I've been to many therapists, which have all been inadequate. I've been on all the meds for my psych problems. None helped.

So sorry, that's terrible...
Do you have a diagnosis? Are you in UK?
 
x~Sophia~x

x~Sophia~x

Always give 100% - unless you’re donating blood.
Sep 10, 2020
1,360
I have many diagnoses. No

You feel ready to have a life so are you just going to give up, or can you see yourself in the Recovery Forum in the not too distant future?
 
Kramer

Kramer

Nervous wreck
Oct 27, 2020
1,398
You feel ready to have a life so are you just going to give up, or can you see yourself in the Recovery Forum in the not too distant future?
I've been in recovery since childhood. Hasn't helped. I've never not been seeking help while living as I have. It's because I've sought help that I can die without guilt.
 
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S

Symbiote

Global Mod
Oct 12, 2020
3,099
Had an internet addiction in my early 20s, and that opened up a whole bunch of people around the world to talk to, but kept myself isolated from real people. I had my online persona and my real life persona. Online persona was more chatty, extroverted, and confident. Real life persona was shy, timid, and quiet. Eventually I combined the two and brought out some of it to the real world until someone found me annoying. LOL, went back to being just a man of a few words until you get to know me better.
 
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x~Sophia~x

x~Sophia~x

Always give 100% - unless you’re donating blood.
Sep 10, 2020
1,360
Had an internet addiction in my early 20s, and that opened up a whole bunch of people around the world to talk to, but kept myself isolated from real people. I had my online persona and my real life persona. Online persona was more chatty, extroverted, and confident. Real life persona was shy, timid, and quiet. Eventually I combined the two and brought out some of it to the real world until someone found me annoying. LOL, went back to being just a man of a few words until you get to know me better.

I relate to this so much... I was a member of a certain forum and we had such good fun chatting and playing games. Made loads of 'friends', I was witty, chatty and extrovert. Then one particular friend wanted us to meet irl and that ruined it all for me. I couldn't meet up because I thought my cover would be blown, so I went to the extent of falling out with this person and leaving the forum.
 
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D

Deleted member 14177

not home
Jan 20, 2020
345
It used to help. More recently, I'm finding it harder and harder to form responses.. it's like words are there but they often feel wrong or idiotic. I can't say how many times I've written a response to a post or an individual and deleted it. Because of this, I'm struggling to communicate with others in general. I feel very lonesome and isolated and lately the struggle to talk to anyone online just makes it worse.
 
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x~Sophia~x

x~Sophia~x

Always give 100% - unless you’re donating blood.
Sep 10, 2020
1,360
It used to help. More recently, I'm finding it harder and harder to form responses.. it's like words are there but they often feel wrong or idiotic. I can't say how many times I've written a response to a post or an individual and deleted it. Because of this, I'm struggling to communicate with others in general. I feel very lonesome and isolated and lately the struggle to talk to anyone online just makes it worse.

I find that very strange because you write such beautiful poetry. The words seem to flow with such ease. I write poetry, but nothing quite as good as yours.
 
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S

Sakura94

empty
Nov 26, 2020
673
More recently, I'm finding it harder and harder to form responses..

Yeah I get this. It's becoming harder for me too.
I did used to love the internet and was the same in that it was my main outlet which was probably not healthy because --mental illness. Nowadays I'm just entertained reading what others post and do. A lot of stuff online is pure nonsense but I'm content to just scroll through it. At this point if I did not have the internet I could probably stare at a blank wall lol.
 
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mathieu

mathieu

Enlightened
Jun 5, 2019
1,090
At the moment I live my life online but I wouldn't say I'm doing great. It's kind of artificial.
 
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D

Deleted member 14177

not home
Jan 20, 2020
345
I find that very strange because you write such beautiful poetry. The words seem to flow with such ease. I write poetry, but nothing quite as good as yours.
Oh, you are so kind. I'm certain your poetry is absolutely beautiful
 
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Meditation guide

Meditation guide

Always was, is, and always shall be.
Jun 22, 2020
6,082
I relate to this so much... I was a member of a certain forum and we had such good fun chatting and playing games. Made loads of 'friends', I was witty, chatty and extrovert. Then one particular friend wanted us to meet irl and that ruined it all for me. I couldn't meet up because I thought my cover would be blown, so I went to the extent of falling out with this person and leaving the forum.
I can relate to this. I'm thinking about this now and can't figure it out. For me it's that I've always been shy probably. People sense that and it doesn't make getting close happen. Shyness is a curse.
 
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P

PDAnnie2610

Waiting for my bus.
Oct 27, 2019
701
Have you had any help from your mental health team, or did you allow your illnesses to progress without any help?
I don't have a mental health team. Though it gets lonely, it's definitely the cheaper devil to sleep with by allowing my mental health to progress without intervention.
 
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S

stevepwn

Member
Aug 27, 2020
14
It wasnt until a few months ago that I woke up in a sense after a decade and suddenly desired a social life, but it can't happen given how bad my illnesses have progressed. Cruel
im too dead inside to care about a social life. as long as i have pot and an internet connection i'm content.
 
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Lastsauce

Lastsauce

Experienced
Dec 22, 2019
258
I used to be ok with being alone. Not so easy anymore at all.
 
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Meditation guide

Meditation guide

Always was, is, and always shall be.
Jun 22, 2020
6,082
I wouldn't remember what a conversation in real life is like. Or even how to talk.
 
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Gromit-CTB

Gromit-CTB

time for ctb
Nov 14, 2020
847
Being on here is a help but that's as far as my internet life is now. Four walls and silence is my life
 
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Nymph

Nymph

he/him
Jul 15, 2020
2,564
Yeah i was always like that and still am. I like being alone at home just in my room doing Crafty stuff and browsing the web
 
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