Discussion Anyone else tortured by past mistakes?

[Anónimo]

Hi guys, I'm just wondering if anyone feels like this, I tend to feel extreme shame and guilt for some mistakes in the past, even if they were already settled and forgiveness was given (or straight up told it was not a big deal) I can't help but cringe at the memories. I remember one time a person pretty much called me annoying (and yes, I was being annoying), but I start to remember it and feel so down even if we were on good terms after that and it happened years ago. I seem to cringe ant the simplest things. Idk just wanted to know if someone else has this stupid brain that worries too much about yesterday. Have a good day guys!

 

[watchingthewheels]

All the time.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I always felt I was living in the past. For me it's very hard not to because memories don't change while everything else is always temporary. I also feel very guilty and always think that I could have done things differently and could have had another outcome.

 

[NaturalBornNEET]

yes I spend most of my time dwelling on shitty past experiences and holding grudges but I dont blame myself for them as much as I blame others. Also I really relate to being called annoying, ive been called that so many times and have had so many people just hate me or feel disgust towards me out of nowhere that ive just learnt to retreat into my shell and not express my personality cuz it seems to be inherently unlikeable. The only way I couldve avoided those mistakes in the past and continue to avoid them now is give up on the prospect of ever having any friends and pleasant social interaction

 

[FuneralCry]

This life can be very depressing as we cannot forget the past and our thoughts can torture us. The way I see it, we will all die eventually and our lives are completely meaningless. Everything that is hurting us now will die with us. Sometimes I do end up thinking about the past a lot, but I guess with mistakes at the time we often did not know any better.

 

[Al_stargate]

In life, you can do everything right but just do one mistake and it's all over. Can't forget, can't forgive myself for trusting the wrong person. So yes, every day is filled with regret and shame. I haven't hurt anybody else but myself, so there is that.

 

[CommitSudoku]

I dwell on people a lot. Thinking of those who left or those I left, since those are my most notable mistakes or else relate to mistakes that led to the end result. It's exhausting and I hate when I start thinking since it can't go back to how it was. I liked some things better about myself back then though. You can get better at pushing away thoughts with practice. Can just make it feel more empty though haha I'm sorry you're also tortured by things no longer in your control since they've already happened.

 

[ikadasui]

Pain everyday.

 

[Anónimo]

yes I spend most of my time dwelling on shitty past experiences and holding grudges but I dont blame myself for them as much as I blame others. Also I really relate to being called annoying, ive been called that so many times and have had so many people just hate me or feel disgust towards me out of nowhere that ive just learnt to retreat into my shell and not express my personality cuz it seems to be inherently unlikeable. The only way I couldve avoided those mistakes in the past and continue to avoid them now is give up on the prospect of ever having any friends and pleasant social interaction

I'm so sorry you had to go through that :(

 

[jimmy7754]

In life, you can do everything right but just do one mistake and it's all over. Can't forget, can't forgive myself for trusting the wrong person. So yes, every day is filled with regret and shame. I haven't hurt anybody else but myself, so there is that.

It is absolutely brutal how this happens.. I was doing fine till I put my trust into someone became vulnerable even though there were so many red flags and before you know it.. I've lost it all .. my mental health and physical health gone.. I'm grabbing at straws.. I'm only 32 and I cannot see myself doing this any longer..

 

[Seafoam]

Lmao are you in my head? I just had a cringe attack.

 

[Journeytoletgo]

Everyday is torture had I stayed away from that south Asian man things would be so different, I wouldn't have abused alcohol

 

[EdibleGasMask]

All too often I get them. They almost always trigger my self harm response, which I hate. I've gotten better at suppressing the SH because of the sheer amount of cringeworthy and stupid things I've done over the years that pop in my head.

 

[Zebedee]

Yes... I've made so many mistakes throughout my life, I've pushed people away, lost relationships, jobs and as a result I have very little to look forward to besides a miserable and lonely life. I don't have anyone to blame but myself, and I don't have the courage to end it even though it would "solve" all my problems.

 

[Sunset Limited]

Not anymore. I am fine since I accept that I will die soon and that everything good or bad will go with me.

 

[Ravel]

my mind lives in the past. I just want to forget everything, even my name, everything. The memories of my past torment me even in my dreams

 

[Anónimo]

my mind lives in the past. I just want to forget everything, even my name, everything. The memories of my past torment me even in my dreams

I hope you can find peace, even in your dreams

 

[lili]

I live tortured by my past mistakes. I feel improper, guilt ridden, a heartless monster.

If someone gets too close and personal with me I grow nervous, because they haven't met my true self.

My past will never cease to haunt me.

Right now I'm reliving regressive patterns of the past. Reliving possibilities of harming and traumatizing people again.

I feel that I don't deserve anything and want to do people a favor by stopping my existence.

 

[TheWood]

Of course, but I'm more bothered by the mistakes of third parties that fall on others. In a just world this wouldn't exist

 

[Gsvko]

It is absolutely brutal how this happens.. I was doing fine till I put my trust into someone became vulnerable even though there were so many red flags and before you know it.. I've lost it all .. my mental health and physical health gone.. I'm grabbing at straws.. I'm only 32 and I cannot see myself doing this any longer..

^^Ditto

 

[Anónimo]

I live tortured by my past mistakes. I feel improper, guilt ridden, a heartless monster.

If someone gets too close and personal with me I grow nervous, because they haven't met my true self.

My past will never cease to haunt me.

Right now I'm reliving regressive patterns of the past. Reliving possibilities of harming and traumatizing people again.

I feel that I don't deserve anything and want to do people a favor by stopping my existence.

I'm sorry that you feel like you don't deserve anything good :(

 

[CiproKilledMe]

"Tortured by past mistakes" perfectly and succinctly describes my current situation. Literal torture as a direct result of epic mistake.

 

[Niirvana]

The past overwhelms me but the present also, my mind is stuck and I can't get out of this anymore, I only think about the day that finally arrives ctb

 

[Of The Universe]

Tortured by the past? That's my middle name!