Anyone else here because they fell for someone?

[AhG]

I'm here because I have a HS sweetheart. We got together when I was a freshman and she was a sophomore. We loved each other like a cheesy Nicholas Sparks book/movie. We moved into together and then things got a little heated after we both got out of HS. It was my fault in the end for our last fight. I swore I would change but school happened and then the thing in school happened. She was also in another state, which made things harder for us. I kind of pushed her away. But we swore to get married and we did, 2 days away from our actual anniversary, 5-27-13x5-25-18. Then I had to be an asshole to her afterwards to the point she gave up on me. I was basically forced into ending our marriage and it worked. She hasn't talked to me in almost 3 months even after I tried to tell her why I did this to us. I'm waiting for the divorce papers, which I honestly don't want because I know I'll lose it and the saddest part is it hasn't even been a year since we got married. I think about her everyday. I'm honestly in love with her but the things I had to do to protect her were for her own good. She saved my life and now she'll be the one ending it, well not really ending it, but fixing it. I have this theory I always told her about. When we die we just start over again. We are reborn and then go through life with the littlest memories we have, that's why we have Déjà Vu, which is my opinion. If I do CTB soon, I would start everything over just to be with her again, all the heart wrenching things just to start over with her again.

 

[JayZT]

To show them that you don't give a f-word about their small sad mindworld. I'd agree that this would be worse than outing yourself as someone who likes someone else. :P

Tbh I'd like to see how they'd all react, not positively but it'd be interesting

It's not weird. That just means you feel infatuated. Infactuation effects your brain in the same way as insanity. Everyone feels like you do when they feel infatuated. However your feelings are wrong. It's a feeling brought about to make you mate, etc.

It feels so true but, I'm literally obsessed and I can't do anything to stop how I feel.

It definitely gets easier as you get older. When you're young it's hard to escape that all encompassing feeling of infatuation that comes with a new love interest. As you age, that intensity dies down a fair bit and you can look at things a bit more rationally. You're also far less attached to any particular outcome.

In terms of being a guy, there are many little things that come together, whether it be physically filling out or just not being so needy, that work in your favor later in life. I have many more women take a friendly interest in me now than I did ten years ago. So I would encourage you to see this as a kind of hump that you'll get over. It may mean letting this one girl go, but you'll feel this way about someone again, even if it doesn't seem like it now.

I hope you're right, I'm trying to put myself into a new mindset but I will see her tomorrow, for the first time in a month.

I'm here because I have a HS sweetheart. We got together when I was a freshman and she was a sophomore. We loved each other like a cheesy Nicholas Sparks book/movie. We moved into together and then things got a little heated after we both got out of HS. It was my fault in the end for our last fight. I swore I would change but school happened and then the thing in school happened. She was also in another state, which made things harder for us. I kind of pushed her away. But we swore to get married and we did, 2 days away from our actual anniversary, 5-27-13x5-25-18. Then I had to be an asshole to her afterwards to the point she gave up on me. I was basically forced into ending our marriage and it worked. She hasn't talked to me in almost 3 months even after I tried to tell her why I did this to us. I'm waiting for the divorce papers, which I honestly don't want because I know I'll lose it and the saddest part is it hasn't even been a year since we got married. I think about her everyday. I'm honestly in love with her but the things I had to do to protect her were for her own good. She saved my life and now she'll be the one ending it, well not really ending it, but fixing it. I have this theory I always told her about. When we die we just start over again. We are reborn and then go through life with the littlest memories we have, that's why we have Déjà Vu, which is my opinion. If I do CTB soon, I would start everything over just to be with her again, all the heart wrenching things just to start over with her again.

I'm sorry to hear you're going/went through something similar to me. It is destroying. It sounds like you get together in the same way/feeling that I hope to. I wish you the best in what occurs over the coming months and hopefully she will get back in touch with you!