Anyone else had bad experiences with mental health professionals?

[phoenixx]

Back when I was around 14/15, I was in a really bad place mentally. I was being bullied at school, my grandmother had passed away and I just wasn't coping well at all. I was suffering with depression and anxiety, I was suicidal and self harming. Going to school was really hard for me. I'd cry everyday and wouldn't want to go. I couldn't concentrate in classes and I would skip lessons. It got so bad that I refused to go and would literally barricade myself in my room, crying and screaming because I just couldn't handle it and would rather die than go there. It got so bad that I ended up dropping out of school by the age of 15.

In the year before I left, I was referred to this place called CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services) and let me tell you, this place was a joke. I'd have to wait months in between appointments and each time I went there, I always saw different people which was difficult for me and I felt like I had to explain everything each time. The sessions would last an hour and I never felt any better afterwards. It just felt like waste of time. One time, I had made an attempt and still wanted to end my life (and was still self harming) so I had to see someone immediately. I spoke to this "counsellor" and she told me "oh you have a good relationship with your mother so you're not actually going to kill yourself" and brushed off my attempt and suicidal thoughts like they were nothing and then moved on to talk about different things. I was then sent home and my mother was told to just keep an eye on me. I was there to get help. At the time, I really did want help and I wanted to get better but I just left there feeling worse and I felt like I wasn't being taken seriously. My whole experience there was just awful and it didn't do me any good. When I left school, I never got another appointment again.

A few years later, after an overdose, I went to my GP and explained how bad I was feeling. Again, the way I was spoken to just felt like I wasn't being taken seriously. I had bad anxiety which effected me to the point where I couldn't go out alone (and it's not much better even now) and when I told her this, she said "you should just try to go out!". I was then given antidepressants and sent on my way.

These experiences, along with others, has made me not want to seek any more help. I just feel like I'll be dealt in the same way again, not taken seriously and just be given more medication.

Anyone else have any similar experiences?

 

[Noctis]

Absolutely. I've dealt with a handful of therapists and psychiatrists, and haven't really found anything helpful.

I do think part of the problem is us. We go to one therapy session and walk out like "Wear the fuck? I still want to die; this was a waste of time."

But I think the biggest problem is suicide is ALWAYS someone else's problem. Tell your gp you want to die? "Hmmm... that's pretty serious. Let me refer you to a colleague." Tell your therapist/psychiatrist you have a gun and you want to see what bullets taste like? "That's not a joke. If you're suicidal, you need to call the helpline." Tell that disembodied voice on the phone that you are ready to jump off your 12-story building? "This isn't a way to live. You need to find a friend you can open up to." Tell your friend you hate your life? "Man, that sucks. You should see a doctor."

In my experience, very very few people will say "You're feeling suicidal? That's bad. Come here, I want to help you." No one wants to help you because no one knows how to help you. It's pretty rare that a suicidal person makes it through all that education and training to help other people when they can barely help themselves, so it's very rare that they even know what you're going through. They know that a light jog through the park while listening to lofi hip hop makes them instantly feel better, so OBVIOUSLY that's all you need.

It's a shitty broken system.

 

[Salkak]

Once I tried to kill myself twice in a single week and when the doctor came to check on me he said only cowards try to kill themselves. Basically most of the mental health professionals don't even know how to handle people.

 

[sadeyesWA]

In my area, you don't need to say you're suicidal to get a ride to the hospital. They only need to think you're a danger to others, or yourself (grey area). For this reason I've only been completely honest 1 time, and it put me in the hospital. I had a choice, go voluntarily, or don't, and be forced by police.

My shrink (different now) does her best to help me, but I can't see her enough and, well, it isn't enough. I'll never tell her my suicidal ideation. I've learned my lesson.

 

[Wingspan]

Low level therapists, i.e. NHS/CAMHS therapists/counsellors are hilarious. From my experience they just recite the DSM's hymn sheet and sycophantically infantilise you whilst simultaneously explaining how you are "wrong" simply because what you think doesn't align with the values they've been taught are "right". Anyone with actual problems shouldn't see a therapist at all, its a greater danger than a potential saviour. How are you supposed to be honest with a stranger whose sole purpose is to extinguish the values they deem 'unfavourable' or 'threatening' out of you, for money - especially so when there is the looming threat of what is essentially imprisonment incessantly looming over you, depending on what you say. Therapy is specifically for people who cannot think for themselves, who cannot introspect with themselves or come to a conclusion after arguing with themselves. They didn't even diagnose me with anything but were quite eager to throw SSRI's at me. I hate to victim blame, but if anyone ever got locked up for admitting they were suicidal to a therapist then they pretty much asked for it. These people are blatantly anti-autonomy, at a fundamental level they are control-freaks playing doctor, and should be trusted under no circumstance. I cannot think of many scenarios that are LESS confidential than a clinical therapy setting.

 

[sadgirlzluvmoney]

Can totally relate. I'd been seeing a psychiatrist and after a year of anti-depressants he gave me the "ok" to go study abroad. I got worse after 3 1/2 years, that I had to drop out. When I came back and started seeing him again along with another psychologist, he told me that, "This is just the way you are and no amount of medication is gonna change that." That kinda crushed me for a couple of weeks cause I really did want to get better. Also, I just felt like he didn't care. Super expensive for only less than 30 minutes of his time cause he would either arrive late or end the session early. They just prescribe some medication and send you on your way hoping the therapist will take care of the rest and then the therapist just listens and hopes the medication will do the rest. It's a messed up cycle where I honestly felt like I wasted my time and money.

If anything, this might sound cheesy but devoting most of my time to my hobbies, reading, music, writing, etc.. that's what really makes me feel better, or at least it distracts me and I feel like I'm anywhere else but here. I'm not a fan of being "here."

 

[UpandDownPrincess]

There are some good providers out there. I know because for a while I had the best psychiatrist ever. I moved far away, otherwise I would never have left his care.

I am pretty honest about my needs, though. I think being older gives you more courage to say what's really on your mind.

When I was looking for a new person to talk to, I asked my psychiatrist. I told him, point blank, that I could not be helped by someone with a shiny new certificate and I would likely scare the hell out of them. He laughed, commiserated, and gave me the name of someone he knew that had like 20 years pf experience in some pretty rough places.

For him, I am the pleasant spot in his day.

It's terribly tough if you have to be assigned someone and cannot pick and choose who you see. I am very lucky to have that freedom to choose. Whenever anyone talks about turning the US into an NHS-type system, I get very, very scared. I like having meds as soon as they are on the market and I like being able to chose who, when, where and why I am treated.

 

[Bleak]

Yes, the majority that I can remember right now were bad. There've been a few really good ones though including my current psychiatrist.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

Had some really good ones, but my youth probably helped me trust more, back then. I'm now more skeptical (and trained) and so I trust less. It didn't help that along the way, I stopped feeling safe in most spaces in the hospital - ironically work is the safest, though it can be tiring and at times, anxiety provoking, sadly. Makes me feel that it gets harder and harder, sadly.

 

[gottago222]

when i was in treatment for anorexia i had a psych tell me "people come in my office ALL THE TIME searching for drugs and they dont need them. but you, you need drugs!!" i was 17 and she made sure my mom wasnt in the room when she said this. i took prozac for a year that did nothing but made me suicidal (when i had never been suicidal prior), had urges to cut myself and dulled all emotions. all i needed to recover was frickin FOOD and a therapist. she can eat a thousand dicks

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I had a psychologist who was very attentive and intelligent. But he made a massive error that effectively ruined my life. In a state of madness where I was only sleeping an hour a night, I was concerned that I should not be managing my own savings in the stock market. I asked him if I should sell everything. He said sure go ahead you can always buy it back later. The next day there was a mini crash and I sold everything. Later that day all of those stocks came back and have been climbing ever since. I lost my last opportunity for financial security. A therapist should never be giving financial advice of any sort. If anything, they should simply say sit tight until you've had a chance to reach some mental stability. In the midst of a mental crisis, one should never be making any big decisions… Quitting a job, divorce, etc. it's professionally unethical for a therapist to offer such advice.

 

[Snake of Eden]

I had a psychologist who was very attentive and intelligent. But he made a massive error that effectively ruined my life. In a state of madness where I was only sleeping an hour a night, I was concerned that I should not be managing my own savings in the stock market. I asked him if I should sell everything. He said sure go ahead you can always buy it back later. The next day there was a mini crash and I sold everything. Later that day all of those stocks came back and have been climbing ever since. I lost my last opportunity for financial security. A therapist should never be giving financial advice of any sort. If anything, they should simply say sit tight until you've had a chance to reach some mental stability. In the midst of a mental crisis, one should never be making any big decisions… Quitting a job, divorce, etc. it's professionally unethical for a therapist to offer such advice.

Maybe attentive and intelligent but no shred of wisdom what so ever

 

[Intelligent_Panic99]

I really agree with what Noctis said about everything.

I've had plenty of really decent MH doctors who really wanted to help me. and in a lot of ways they have. They are truly good people. It's just maybe most MH people can't actually deal with this particular issue.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Yes, they should be in prison.

 

[meetapple]

My therapist recently told she has reached the end of her ability to help me and has referred me to another therapist. While talking to my psychiatrist he made me think that I had done something to offend her. She would make a lot of comments whenever I would say things in my mind like "yep" or clear her throat at certain times as if to mock me. I wrote a couple emails to her about it. She might have just gotten sick of me. Aside from that she actually helped me.

 

[Lostandlooking]

I have similar experiences. It makes me sad to hear so many people have bad experiences with mental health professionals.

Talked to lots of therapists the last 14 years. I get super anxious when I think about talking about my problems nowadays. Because I know I won't be heard.

 

[Fear&Loathing]

Where to start. I put a complaint in recently as my local services are so bad. I complained about various things that had happened over the years. Them causing me to lose my driving license, terrible unqualified therapists, being laughed at, massive inaccuracies in my file such as them stating I was on certain medications when I wasn't. Most recently I developed medically induced parkinsons from mind meds. I was told to continue taking them! Of course a lot of this became unprovable and so now it seems like they are gas lighting me and telling me I made it all up. I have to have a meeting with them soon. Dreading it as the whole thing is likely to be a tightrope exercise. I find it very difficult to trust people and usually now end up getting the wrong end of the stick. That said I can prove some of what happened and I know it did.

 

[Seiba]

I was on psych meds when I was younger but I didn't really remember anyone other than the GP. For the therapist my mom claimed to have not had liked how she was dressing and wouldn't let me do the therapy unless she was in the room with me. I think the reality is my mother likely liked the idea of knowing everything I said but I don't really remember ever meeting the therapist to begin with. The therapist basically told my mom to leave if I wasn't going to be allowed to do the session privately. That aside, I was signed up for therapy after my first suicide attempt at sixteen. It was a six months waiting list. My mother after calling my attempt selfish and berating me for having no reason to do so decided to unenroll me from therapy because it was just 'teenage hormones'. With what I know about suicide and what therapist legally have to do if you are planning with the means and how colleges force you on medical leave if you bring it up -- I'm not sure I would ever tell a therapist or go to one. I do wonder what could have been if I had therapy before and after my first attempt, but it would have required my emotional state being somewhat cared about. Also general competence on the therapist end, which can vary wildly.

I may try it in the future, but by the time I would be able to afford I'll be dead in all likely hood. I'm not sure if I would bring up suicide or not, assuming the best you'd assume that giving them that information would better help them with information on treatment plans. I've looked up suicide a decent amount however, and I can't really see anything that would bring much benefit to someone who thinks of suicide on a long term basis. Part of what turns me off of therapist and the mental health system is how little coherence there is defined for people like myself. No one actually defines what the help is or why I should try risking my safety to talk to them. For years and years of schooling they can hardly be bothered it seems. The average person just uses "go to therapist" as a homily as to not be bothered with you, but they hardly know what would constitute therapy either.

Here's something as well. Therapist are generally (united states based) rarely trained to even deal with the suicidal at all. They just know to do risk assessment because of agency requirements or otherwise. Their actual training is so low that it's outright stated if you want someone with some level of suicide training to go a psychiatrist.

We tell suicidal people to go to therapy. So why are therapists rarely trained in suicide?

Suicidal people who seek therapy may not know that suicide training for mental health professionals is dangerously inadequate.

www.usatoday.com

 

[empty]

In my area, you don't need to say you're suicidal to get a ride to the hospital. They only need to think you're a danger to others, or yourself (grey area). For this reason I've only been completely honest 1 time, and it put me in the hospital. I had a choice, go voluntarily, or don't, and be forced by police.

My shrink (different now) does her best to help me, but I can't see her enough and, well, it isn't enough. I'll never tell her my suicidal ideation. I've learned my lesson.

I relate a lot. The one time that I opened up about an attempt, I ended up in the hospital. Since then, I haven't talked to my therapist about my suicidal thoughts.

 

[likeokaybutwhy]

It's such a mixed bag, but hella heavy on the unhelpful side. I've been in therapy on and off since I was ten, have had inpatient and outpatient stints with and without my consent, and have had some of the wildest buffoonery with psychiatrists. However, I have had two practitioners who I felt fairly safe with. That said, do I feel great? No. Have I been physically assaulted, mocked, ignored and overall disrespected by "medical professionals" and cops since I was a kid? Absolutely.
It's a pity, I feel like if people had time and energy to be able to give help and get help in a way that met the client's needs, maybe humanity would be in a better place? Also, I live in the US so any sort of public health care dreams are continuously shattered.

 

[eternalpeace]

I have consulted many clinicians over the course of 17 years. I have had some really excellent doctors and therapists, some terrible ones, and the rest were somewhere in between. I had one dr in the ER tell me that I was deliberately acting like a "time bomb about to go off" in order to worry my friends. One Dr tried to refer me to the same group therapy program for the third time, notwithstanding that it hadn't helped. Another Dr said I was "acting like a nut". A few were dismissive, spouting off the old "it's cowardly/selfish" or "if you REALLY wanted to die, you would be dead already".

The Dr I have now is wonderful, and has done everything he can think to try to help. I believe if I had found him earlier, I might have had a shot at a decent life. I think you really have to advocate for yourself, and keep looking if a clinician isn't helpful. There are some great ones out there, so don't lose hope if you haven't found one yet.

 

[Ashu]

I first fell into their hands after my first attempt at fourteen. In brief, they're generally reptiles who have been attracted to the profession by anything but empathy for the mentally suffering. Peter Breggin said it well:

<The typical psychiatrist is a technocrat who has no sense of the human spirit, no sense that human issues are involved in the problems people bring for treatment.>

 

[waitingforrest]

So many that I can't remember. Sucks even more when I was a minor, I had no rights at all. Funny now that killing myself is a better idea than being hospitalized for a week, in my head.

 

[Ashu]

Yes, they should be in prison.

They should be behind a fucking cash register.

 

[eternalpeace]

I had a psychologist who was very attentive and intelligent. But he made a massive error that effectively ruined my life. In a state of madness where I was only sleeping an hour a night, I was concerned that I should not be managing my own savings in the stock market. I asked him if I should sell everything. He said sure go ahead you can always buy it back later. The next day there was a mini crash and I sold everything. Later that day all of those stocks came back and have been climbing ever since. I lost my last opportunity for financial security. A therapist should never be giving financial advice of any sort. If anything, they should simply say sit tight until you've had a chance to reach some mental stability. In the midst of a mental crisis, one should never be making any big decisions… Quitting a job, divorce, etc. it's professionally unethical for a therapist to offer such advice.

Yikes. A therapist should definitely not be giving financial advice! (Or legal advice, or any other type of advice beyond their expertise). I'm so sorry you lost that money.

 

[LeGuitarist]

When I was pretty young, I got my first (and last) therapist. It was working well, but obviously, that didn't last. One of my sessions didn't go very well, and I had a strong, overwhelming urge to ctb afterwards. I used my parents' credit card to buy some pills, and as SS didn't exist back then, I vented to one of my online friends about my plan to ctb. That friend of mine somehow managed to track down one of my classmates and told her that I was planning to ctb, and she told her parents, who told my parents. My parents ended up confronting me, and ngl they had some pretty good interrogation skills. Within a few minutes I cracked and told them my plans. Them being concerned parents took my laptop and searched through it, finding all of my conversations with all of my friends and whatnot. I was sent to a mental hospital, but right before that, I had one last session with my therapist. I told her how upset I was that my parents went through my laptop and how I felt it was a violation of my privacy. My therapist told me that I should understand why my parents did that—and she was right. It was completely understandable for my parents to look through my laptop considering that I had just bought pills to overdose on. But for some reason, something just clicked in me; maybe it was the tone of her voice, or her facial expression, but I felt as if she were on my parents' side, rather than on mine. Ever since then, I haven't trusted any mental health professional.

 

[I-can-only-imagine]

Yes!!!! Some of the stories I have, has made my case manager just sit there looking at me in complete shock. I am lucky now that I have an awesome team, even if I haven't got better whatsoever. It isn't due to them.

 

[Fish Face]

Yep, being humiliating day after day by them, blaming me for being sexually abused by other inmates (I will never call them patients), telling me I should be raped, blaming me for the actions of somebody who tried to kill me with a spoon on a trip on the Norfolk Broads because i actually stood up for myself. I am nearing 50 years old and the way they treated you was so terrible, although I know from other reports others had it much worse. I cannot get any treatment now and never. I get blamed for being a liar all the time. You cannot make my life up. I keep trying to get help but they just don't want to consider that you can't get better by having a walk, doing voluntary work, etc, etc. The pay rate of a consultant psychistrist is £100,000 per annum and they don't get anyone to fill that post. The pay rate of the Prime Minister is less, and the last Consultant Phychistrist I spoke to didn't even know the basic facts of the medication he prescribed. All the psychriatrists seemed to want to do is get rid of me.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Yikes. A therapist should definitely not be giving financial advice! (Or legal advice, or any other type of advice beyond their expertise). I'm so sorry you lost that money.

Yeah it was unfortunate

 

[deathismymeaning]

i've had to deal with therapists that work in the hospital who have told me that I am the reason why Im not getting better that I am the problem, then a psychiatrist from another hospital told me that she doesn't know what to do with me because she was convinced I was too far gone, and the classic the social workers and therapists who after 15 minutes of conversing with me turn to me with the utmost confidence that she believe that since I am well versed and not a nervous wreck when talking to then about all the shit I've been through that nothing is wrong with me other than that I want attention.