Anyone else "Fine"/not severely depressed, but still ready to leave?

[Leastofall]

I feel like maybe some others can relate to me here? I'm doing okay in general. I'm comfortably employed, keeping up appearances, and have a social network of acquaintances/casual friendships... but if someone held a gun to my head rn I'd be thrilled if they'd pull the trigger.

I don't even have addictions issues or any particularly deep sadness. I go to therapy, I've got several hobbies, and I've kept a relatively healthy lifestyle, but I fundamentally don't want to keep doing this. I cannot imagine a long-term life on this earth. Humans are so goddamn awful to one another, and to our planet, that I just don't see a future in which any kind of truly meaningful life can be obtained for myself. I have my momentary sources of happiness in my life, and I'm genuinely grateful for them, but knowing that this is pretty much as good as it gets? That's unbearable. It's too exhausting to keep scraping by in the hopes for more. Trying to get anything out of life these days is like drawing blood from a stone.

Between being aware of the scale of climate change, the current economic instability in my country, and the general isolation/unravelling of the social fabric in my generation... I just don't want to bother. More power to those who keep trying, but ugh, not for me. I'm actually at the point where I'm just waiting for my siblings to finish school/get established, so that when I finally CTB I'm not going to cause a massive financial crater in their lives (because I do love them, and I think my weak grip on life shouldn't be their problem).

I am not really unhappy with my day-to-day at all either. I have a pretty big heart and appreciate the beauty in life... but christ, I'm just tired and ready to call it quits.

Anyone else just passively ready to go, without any big sense of anger or despair?

 

[girlsfoodgear]

man, i feel like i could've written this post myself.

no solution or advice to help, i'm afraid, but just wanted you to know you're not alone in feeling this exact way.

 

[aGoodDayToDie]

I'm vaguely comfortable. Relatively minor problems. But nevertheless the unpleasantness is still greater than any occasional mild joy I get. For 23 years now I'd always have been happy to stop existing. I just haven't been able to overcome difficulties of dying. But if I knew I were going to die in my sleep tonight I'd be happy.

My life is just full of boredom and emptiness. I get little satisfaction from anything. There really is no point in living. It's a ridiculous exercise to be forced to continue with. I have a fucking meaningless life.

 

[doneforlife]

I feel like maybe some others can relate to me here? I'm doing okay in general. I'm comfortably employed, keeping up appearances, and have a social network of acquaintances/casual friendships... but if someone held a gun to my head rn I'd be thrilled if they'd pull the trigger.

I don't even have addictions issues or any particularly deep sadness. I go to therapy, I've got several hobbies, and I've kept a relatively healthy lifestyle, but I fundamentally don't want to keep doing this. I cannot imagine a long-term life on this earth. Humans are so goddamn awful to one another, and to our planet, that I just don't see a future in which any kind of truly meaningful life can be obtained for myself. I have my momentary sources of happiness in my life, and I'm genuinely grateful for them, but knowing that this is pretty much as good as it gets? That's unbearable. It's too exhausting to keep scraping by in the hopes for more. Trying to get anything out of life these days is like drawing blood from a stone.

Between being aware of the scale of climate change, the current economic instability in my country, and the general isolation/unravelling of the social fabric in my generation... I just don't want to bother. More power to those who keep trying, but ugh, not for me. I'm actually at the point where I'm just waiting for my siblings to finish school/get established, so that when I finally CTB I'm not going to cause a massive financial crater in their lives (because I do love them, and I think my weak grip on life shouldn't be their problem).

I am not really unhappy with my day-to-day at all either. I have a pretty big heart and appreciate the beauty in life... but christ, I'm just tired and ready to call it quits.

Anyone else just passively ready to go, without any big sense of anger or despair?

That would be me. I do have some physical challenges. That's about it. I have never had any addiction as well. It's just that if given a choice between non existence and existence, I h'd choose non existence. And that's cause I am not severely attached to life. I don't know why. The only thing between me and death is pain. If my pain center stopped working, I would go into non existence without a second thought.

Mathematically, I feel, life is not a 'net positive'. There are some pain which are guaranteed. But happiness is not guaranteed. You have to work towards it. It's like..you don't have to do anything to loose a job , but to keep it you need to keep working. I just wish, every one who landed in this planet had the right to switch off themselves when they couldn't take it anymore.

 

[lonegore]

I feel the same way. I have a roof over my head, I have an okay job, I have one friend. I go to therapy. I just feel like those things aren't enough to keep me alive. And it's the precise things like a family, that I'm missing. I really do not see any point on going any further, what will I gain from it? As lame as it may sound, we're basically giving up on life, and that's totally okay.

 

[shantyizlit]

Someone once told me that most people exit this life not because of terrible despair but because of logical sense.. and that stuck with me.
I am just so over this life, if it's not an objectively positive experience then why bother with it? That just makes no sense to me. I do derive joy from my daily life but the negatives far outweigh the positives. I just never want to get out of bed in the mornings because I just don't want to bother with my life, but I can't just lay in bed forever either.
The solution of an eternal sleep sounds like a good option to me.
Once the void of nothingness that is supposedly death becomes the viable option contrary to living a life (which has substance), it only starts to logically make sense to leave. But most people don't know jack shit about peaceful methods of suicide and are scared to death (hehe lol) of the methods to ctb that they can consider. And even if they were to stand at the top of a tall building their SI would make them shit bricks and think twice about the attempt.
If there was a reliable peaceful option like Nembutal readily available for the masses I think a lot more people than one might think would choose to opt out.

I feel the same way. I have a roof over my head, I have an okay job, I have one friend. I go to therapy. I just feel like those things aren't enough to keep me alive. And it's the precise things like a family, that I'm missing. I really do not see any point on going any further, what will I gain from it? As lame as it may sound, we're basically giving up on life, and that's totally okay.

Like in war sometimes what makes the most sense is just to forfeit.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm fairly similar. Things aren't quite so secure for me employment wise and I don't live such a balanced life- with social connections. Still- things certainly aren't terrible. They're just kind of- not really worth it! Plus, yeah- I have to agree that it's depressing being a human seeing what we do to the world and how we treat one another.