Discussion Anyone else feel different from the other patients at the psych ward?

[rats]

When I look at the other patients at the psych ward, I understand why they're there, they're impulsive, in crisis, have voices in their head, and so on.
They don't think rationally about ctb, they want to live and recover, they're just in a moment of weakness.

I'm not that, I feel like I shouldn't be taking a bed from someone who might regret their actions, I'm a very non-impulsive and rational person, I think logically about things, and because of that I'm always out of there quickly.

I've been wondering if anyone else has noticed this difference between themselves and other patients?

 

[ApparentlyNot]

Hell yes I relate to this. A therapist once told me that most suicides take place during "a mental health crisis" when the individual's behavior and thought patterns differ significantly from their "normal" state. Don't get me wrong, I've had my fair share of mental health crises that have directly resulted in suicidal behavior, however, most of the time, I am functioning with a fairly sound mind. There are a lot of pro-lifers (and by that, I mean regular people lol) who would argue that having a "sound mind" and wanting to CTB are fundamentally incompatible and even impossible - however, I feel like this is willful ignorance on their part.

My personality type (via the Myers-Briggs personality test) is an INTP, we are known specifically for introverted, logical thinking. I am generally not impulsive either, I plan methodically (unless I'm in "a mental health crisis"). There are a lot of people who wake up after an attempt to CTB and instantly regret their choice - people who are happy to have survived, but this simply won't happen to me, because I'm not acting impulsively or irrationally - I have thought about this. I get the impression that the other people in the psych ward can be helped with medication, and I get the impression that my issue is different, it's a deep part of my psyche and "who I am" and I cannot address my issues directly with an SSRI or a mood stabilizer.

I haven't been to a psych ward in years, but when I arrive in one I'm always looking around for that one other depressed person who I can relate to and doesn't sound "crazy." No shade to the individuals experiencing acute psychosis and the like, I just can't relate to it usually. Hence feeling "different."