Discussion anyone else dealing with religious trauma?

[kindawannacrylol]

I haven't seen many people discuss religious trauma as a reason to ctb on here? anyone else dying because religion has destroyed them?

 

[subj]

You mean religion itself or behaviour of priests, ministers?

 

[gr1lledcheese]

Not me, but I've no doubt that if I'd stayed a Christian I would have religious trauma. It may work for some, but it was definitely not for me.

 

[Samsal112]

Depends on what you mean. I didn't suffer any like outrageous practices or beliefs, but I do not believe my life would be the mess it is today if my family did not always just say, "Pray on it and trust in God" instead of using actual logic to problems. My family uses such little logic in everyday life and just go with the flow, but they wonder why our lives are a mess.

 

[Pluto]

My mother was a Catholic fanatic, always in her own world and divorced from reality. For the most part, I feel completely foreign to the concept of ever being loved. And because her religion promoted misogyny, she readily tolerated narcissism on the part of my father while motivating my 2 older sisters to want me dead. It was all one big shit show and 40 years later I have not even begun to recover.

 

[Gsvko]

I completely gave up religion when I realised I need to tell my priest when I masturbate. Ppppiss off old man. They also always said it was devil in me instead of MH issues, but I never took them seriously because I didn't respect them.
But I do have a friend who used to be a fananatic, she had a really hard time. I think I can understand how that can happen.

 

[blueclover_.]

Attendance. Yup, religions are brutal.

 

[AtMostOkay]

Y

I haven't seen many people discuss religious trauma as a reason to ctb on here? anyone else dying because religion has destroyed them?

I am a product of a violent cult. I escaped a long, long time ago, but it shaped me, I admit. I'm sorry for whatever you went through, and for the jagged edges that still cut. Peace.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Everything can get traumatic. Existence itself if revealed to us in its real form is traumatic. Nothing is actually what it seems to be. Everything that is gained will be lost no matter how hard we try to hold on to. Mkay

 

[senti-mental]

It's definitely a big part of why i'm suicidal. my mother and her family are jehovah's witnesses, and its a horrible cult. they believe that my schizophrenia is because my "lifestyle" attracts demonic influences. They literally see no problem with telling me when im psychotic that i really am being tortured by demons and that its due to choosing to leave the faith and transition.

 

[myopybyproxy]

I wouldn't call my experience trauma per se, but yes, my Orthodox Jewish upbringing and environment plays a role in my worsening mental health. God didn't do jack shit when I prayed to him when I was younger and had a shred of faith. I do believe that a god exists but all religion is a scam to control people. They are all cults to varying degrees.

An especially fun time is when my mother tells me my mental illnesses (depression, gender dysphoria) are just arrogance - saying I know better than god because I feel worthless and trapped in a false costume and he doesn't make mistakes - ie I have a mysterious purpose and was meant to stay AFAB my entire life.

Religious ceremonies and services are another big ol' party - what with all the gendered language and separation by birth sex. And don't get me started on the schools. The hypocrisy and callousness in the 'community' makes me borderline homicidal. It's a fucking joke. They act all pompous and try to scare people into acting decently in public so the goyim won't think poorly of them. Then they treat the outcasts like shit behind closed doors. But joke's on them because those who think the poorest are their own misguided, 'off the derech' lost children of god who need to be brought back to the fucking light. The light in Satan's asshole, maybe. Sooner or later they will fracture from the inside - that amount of dissonance is simply not sustainable.

 

[ShatteredSoul]

I have multiple traumas from being raised a jehovahs witness.

 

[ThriveOrDie]

I was raised in the mainstream mormon cult, not the super crazy fundamentalist mormon cult. It taught me some good things but also contributed to my feelings of isolation and not being able to relate and connect to others. As far as faith in God goes it nearly destroyed that. I believe in God again after some healing but I refuse to waste any time on any of those ridiculous books that Christians worship…and trying to sort out what was right and wrong that I was taught. I just threw it all out the window except the Golden Rule. I agree that all the religions are culty to some extent and their purpose is to control.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

My whole life but not so severe as I became secular at a young age

I was raised in an every Sunday kind of family and attended various churches which ran the line from very strict Baptist to new age Christian stuff

My main issue is I feel as if so much of my youth was wasted at these places and possibly it prevented me from living to my full potential since I had to waste time on that BS instead of going to More stimulating secular activities

However one thing I will say about being raised in a religious environment is it does expose you to the community. It's more or less forced socialization and you get to see how other people of many different ages work, and also people always gossip in church

 

[Journeytoletgo]

Yes it's why I feel so much shame and guilt after sex, and fear of dying as well it ruined my life just as any other trauma ruined me

 

[jandek]

Religious trauma did a number on my mental health. I grew up in a fairly vanilla evangelical church, but as I grew older they adopted some pretty hardcore Calvinist views: total depravity, double predestination, and all that. The cognitive dissonance of trying to make sense of the theology was brutal. I couldn't be honest about my thoughts and feelings at all. Endless gaslighting. I feel like I wasted my teens and 20s hating myself and hating normal human desires. It kills me because I can never get that time back.

 

[veryhappyhuman]

I wouldn't say it was trauma to the extent of others here who have actually suffered physically/mentally from it. But it certainly contributed at least a small % to my ctb decision. My parents are extremely religious, dogmatic, hyperconservative and superstitious -- for example arcane rules like I can't cut my nails or book a frickin' air ticket in the house, on certain days of the week. Another example was the time I got locked out of the house as a kid for a night (during a storm no less) for masturbating lol.

This lead to two things: a) From a young age, I subconsciously learned how to skillfully lie and deceive because I had to constantly hide my not-so-clean actions from them and, b) Alienating me from them and others in our circles, because I share nothing common in terms of beliefs or ideology or even topics of general discussion with them. I basically have no connection or attachment to where I live in. Ultimately, this meant isolation, loneliness etc etc.

 

[AtMostOkay]

Religious trauma all but ruined me. Maybe it did, and I'm just stubborn.

 

[watchingthewheels]

Yes, re homosexuality, which I've never fully accepted in myself. I still have lingering issues re religion, despite being an atheist for decades, now.