O

okyeah

Arcanist
Jul 20, 2018
425
Used to have a pretty bad video game addiction. I now realize it was just all coping. I'm pretty much addicted to anything hedonistic - it's just that I cannot get my hands on harder drugs and no one would want to have sex with me.

That's all addiction is I guess..ppl just need things to cope because there are unsolvable problems a lot of us have, so might as well have fun while you're here.
 
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A

ArtsyDrawer

Enlightened
Nov 8, 2018
1,445
My addiction has become stupid.
Smoking. Regular ol cigarettes.
That doesn't sound stupid yet, sure, so allow me to add a stupid detail: I'm not allowed to quit. Not "I tried to quit and failed", no, I'm not allowed to quit.
Every single blood test, Mri, MRA, mrv and meg I took were with "smoking a pack a day" in mind. Those took around 6 years to assemble. If I quit now, I'll have to redo six years of magnet hopping. My neurologist facepalmed as he delivered that verdict.
 
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TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
802
My main addiction has been to adderall, but I have other ones that are behavioral as well. Taking out the Adderall has definitely helped but now there's other ones I have to kick ;-; Trying to do this with little support is very hard. No I can't afford treatment or therapy although if I make myself poor enough than I might be able to qualify for Medicaid. Lol!
You can for sure figure out a way to qualify for Medicaid. You have to have less than $2,000 in your bank account. There is a certain amount you can only make per month for it to be free (for me it was $1800, don't know if that's standard, or based on something), and then there is some equation for an amount that you pay (should be minimal) if you make more. But a mental illness diagnosis will qualify you—you just have to jump through the hoops of paperwork bullshit & do it all on time so they don't try to disqualify you.
 
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TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
802
men are more conditioned to get sex without investment in us it's actually gotten harder for women. I mean women like me have not helped matters by being promiscuous. Once they invented birth control and sort of turned women into men by urging us that we need careers and to be less dependent on men. This kind of altered how men behave. Especially the taking sex out of the context of marriage.

Yes! It aggravates me that I knew all of this, & was promiscuous too, myself. All of those idiots. Women are also conditioned to be responsible for men's sexuality and orgasms, too. Fuck that. But a different me thought that made me more of an asset. I too, like I saw you wrote in another comment, ended up not having a family either.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
You can for sure figure out a way to qualify for Medicaid. You have to have less than $2,000 in your bank account. There is a certain amount you can only make per month for it to be free (for me it was $1800, don't know if that's standard, or based on something), and then there is some equation for an amount that you pay (should be minimal) if you make more. But a mental illness diagnosis will qualify you—you just have to jump through the hoops of paperwork bullshit & do it all on time so they don't try to disqualify you.
Thanks for this information by the way :)
 
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The Blackangel

The Blackangel

Nyiach des uti nesi deh ahy.
Nov 3, 2018
212
I'm doing pretty good now, but I had a major drug problem when I was younger. I did virtually everything you can think of. I spent 2 years high as fuck, and another 2 years trying to get clean. I still smoke grass on occasion, but even that is getting harder to find. But we just passed a medical marijuana bill, so it may get easier. If I thought I could get away with it, I would do a few lines of nutmeg. But my wife would either leave me, or kill me, figuratively speaking. I could probably get away with it once, but once wouldn't be enough. That shit is great.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I'm doing pretty good now, but I had a major drug problem when I was younger. I did virtually everything you can think of. I spent 2 years high as fuck, and another 2 years trying to get clean. I still smoke grass on occasion, but even that is getting harder to find. But we just passed a medical marijuana bill, so it may get easier. If I thought I could get away with it, I would do a few lines of nutmeg. But my wife would either leave me, or kill me, figuratively speaking. I could probably get away with it once, but once wouldn't be enough. That shit is great.
Nutmeg? Lol
 
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The Blackangel

The Blackangel

Nyiach des uti nesi deh ahy.
Nov 3, 2018
212
I'm serious about nutmeg. It will send you flying for 3 days straight. It's not for the light hearted.
 
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weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,525
I'm serious about nutmeg. It will send you flying for 3 days straight. It's not for the light hearted.
This is truth, although it's supposed to make you feel like absolute trash too.
 
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The Blackangel

The Blackangel

Nyiach des uti nesi deh ahy.
Nov 3, 2018
212
This is truth, although it's supposed to make you feel like absolute trash too.

No argument there, but it's still one hell of a high.
 
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weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,525
No argument there, but it's still one hell of a high.
Hehe I can imagine, I think people should do some research before they start swallowing nutmeg though because, as you say, it's pretty intense. Some people can't really handle it well.
 
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The Blackangel

The Blackangel

Nyiach des uti nesi deh ahy.
Nov 3, 2018
212
You don't swallow. You snort.
 
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weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,525
You don't swallow. You snort.
Oh maybe that's why you haven't had really terrible effects then, I don't know, the stories I saw were of people who had swallowed multiple teaspoons of the stuff.
 
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Niko

Niko

Student
Oct 4, 2018
112
alcohol although I haven't had a drop in 2 and a 1/2 years. The problem, at least for me, wasn't the substance; the problem is me.

I should say there are many ways I believe addiction manifests itself that don't involve substance abuse. Like with relationships and how obsessed and insane I get, like a complete maniac. Or with insecurities and how I focus incessantly on the problems i have and the mistakes i've made and the general misery of my life. or just the common avoiding anything uncomfortable and choosing something cheap & easy instead
 
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The Blackangel

The Blackangel

Nyiach des uti nesi deh ahy.
Nov 3, 2018
212
Oh maybe that's why you haven't had really terrible effects then, I don't know, the stories I saw were of people who had swallowed multiple teaspoons of the stuff.


Are you sure you're not getting nutmeg confused with cinnamon?
 
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weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,525
Are you sure you're not getting nutmeg confused with cinnamon?
Yes I'm certain! https://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Myristicin#Subjective_effects
"One study found 20 grams of nutmeg to contain 210 mg myristicin."

Honestly think it would be better to get diphy than start eating nutmeg.

Here it says 5-15g of nutmeg is a light dose and I'm assuming 5g is about 1 teaspoon or more, so yeah people do swallow large amounts of the stuff in attempt to get a shitty high.
  • Light: 5 - 15g
  • Common: 15 - 20g
  • Strong: 20 - 30g
  • Heavy: 30g+
 
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The Blackangel

The Blackangel

Nyiach des uti nesi deh ahy.
Nov 3, 2018
212
I just wanted to make sure. I've heard kids got some kind of a cheap high off that cinnamon challenge bullshit, and I know a lot of people confuse the 2 spices.
 
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S

Shewaitsforme

Arcanist
Sep 23, 2018
493
Cocaine addicted here. My life has gotten progressively worse since then.

I got addicted to cocaine on a psych ward of all places. Id taken it befoe tho. On the ward i wasnt on any medication so turned to cocaine to help me cope. Now im out its so hard to stop thinking about getting some.
 
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J

Jaded

Student
Sep 8, 2018
111
I got addicted to cocaine on a psych ward of all places. Id taken it befoe tho..
That's insane! Did an outpatient or visitor provide it ? Cocaine can be more psychological than physical so it can be tough to overcome.
 
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Dani Paradox

Dani Paradox

Permanently Banned
Aug 17, 2018
981
I don't consider myself a "real alcoholic" because of my particular situation. Technically, an "alcoholic" is someone who simply just can't stop drinking. They don't know why....they just can't stop drinking. Well, I know why. And it doesn't have to be alcohol. Poppy tea works too. I just need SOMETHING. And if it weren't for my story and what happened to me/what I am going through then I wouldn't need something. Unfortunately, I am unable to tackle the root of the problem, which is why I need to ctb. So anyway, because of that, I don't consider myself a "real alcoholic." And I haven't really been drinking the past couple of weeks except twice because I ran out of cash. But if I had cash I'd still be drunk 24/7.
 
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S

Snee

Student
Aug 3, 2018
135
i was addict to porno since kid.now i cant do that i mean if i watch too much i had mental breakdown.i should born in 1800 so there is no internet. technology killing peoples.
 
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S

Shewaitsforme

Arcanist
Sep 23, 2018
493
That's insane! Did an outpatient or visitor provide it ? Cocaine can be more psychological than physical so it can be tough to overcome.

Came in both ways and medication sharing. Some people are on alot of high strenght medications and trading for drugs happens alot
 
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