An outsider in my own body

[ringo99]

Ever since I started making preparations to ctb I've experienced periods where I feel like I'm not in control of myself. The closest analogy I can give is being inside a fleshy robot where I can see everything that it's doing but not in charge of anything. It's not quite an out of body experience but close. It doesn't last too long, just a few seconds or so. But it is becoming more frequent and gradually increasing in duration. It results in a sense of detachment that's unlike anything that's happened to me before.

I sometimes fantasize that one of these days I can force my consciousness to leave my body long enough for it to die. Not sure what'll happen after that but at this point I don't particularly care

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

i think i'm a bit opposite. not been comfortable in my own skin for a few years.

 

[cosmic-freedom]

Yeah.This is probably derealization and detachment after we have mentally given up.It feels relieving not having any attachment to this world.

 

[uzuf86]

I feel the same these days, it's as if my conscience is fading away.

 

[casandranova29]

its kind of scary dude...

 

[an_alias]

i feel for you OP. i get the exact same thing. a lot of the time my body just feels like some flesh puppet i'm bound to, one that i can barely control let alone live in peacefully