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itsbigbraintime

itsbigbraintime

SN Wizard
Feb 14, 2020
79
What's life anymore? I want to bleed onto the floor until I slowly slip into nothingness. Life is too much, too draining, too stressful, and at the same time too monotonous. We only get one chance at existing, and you're saying this is all we get? Maybe it's worth it for some people, but ultimately I don't see a point. With the exception of a few lucky people, the odds are stacked against us. We're expected to wake up every day and greet adversity with a smile. The sick part is I don't have the will to leave. I don't. I wish I did. It's not necessarily the want to be dead, it's just the want for things to be different or better. But between the two, guess which is the more likely to happen? Even if I accomplish something, it feels empty, meaningless. It's a brief sense of relief followed by the immediate anxiety of "Okay, what now?". I've experienced what it's like to be in the active process of dying before, and you know what? It's not that bad. I believe that the concept of being dead is likely scarier than death itself. It's just a shame that the initial fear is so hard to get over.
 
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