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Kundalini Guy

Kundalini Guy

FULLY RECOVERED
Mar 27, 2023
517
It's the same with me. I won't leave any notes or anything, I will act like I normally do but In a more positive mood and then CTB. I think the note would do more damage than good. After the grief eventually my family would understand why I did it because they knew I had mental problems.
 
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searchingpeace

searchingpeace

Member
May 2, 2023
43
No one important will read it. No "family" or anyone who knows me will be able to read it. I plan to ctb far away from home location. The people that will find and process my corpse wont give a shit about what i put down. I don't care what happens to my body.

Believe me. The coroners/law enforcment will probably pass around your suicide note for some laughs. I know these people's mentality. You are just a piece of trash that needs to be removed to them
 
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leavingsoon99

I'm at peace... Finally.
Mar 16, 2023
722
I'm not going to leave a note. It's kind of pointless. My intention is to die. I don't care if I'm remembered or how I'm remembered. I'm leaving knowing that I did the absolute best I could with the guidance and knowledge and support that I had available to me. Funerals, notes, and shit... I don't care.
 
RedHotRage

RedHotRage

Member
May 1, 2023
31
Knowing me, I probably will leave one, being something written impulsively as hell. But I also know that there's some sweet, cold revenge in saying nothing at all.
 
sheepgirl

sheepgirl

-
Aug 11, 2018
119
It's not that I don't want to but every time I get to the point of trying to take my life I am too depressed to put the effort into it. People involved in my treatment and my family know why I'd kill myself. Most of its already documented
 
AresCohere

AresCohere

Professional Insomniac
Apr 10, 2023
149
I feel like I want to just to try to ease some of the pain they would get, but people around me did also cause most of my pain so I might just basically write in who caused it. Might make them finally feel guilty for what they have done.
 
nanfranci

nanfranci

worth more dead then alive
Mar 2, 2023
20
i feel the same way. i tried the best i could to give people warnings about what i was going to do. now i have nothing left to say to them.
 
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hellispink

hellispink

poisonous
May 26, 2022
1,228
There is no point on leaving notes. I may leave instructions but I won't give details into why I did it or any personal detail about my life. If they did not care while being alive, why would they when i am dead, doesn't make any sense. We all to this point because no one really cared truly because this society is shit so there is no point
 
J

JensenX

Member
Jun 6, 2022
24
No one important will read it. No "family" or anyone who knows me will be able to read it. I plan to ctb far away from home location. The people that will find and process my corpse wont give a shit about what i put down. I don't care what happens to my body.

Believe me. The coroners/law enforcment will probably pass around your suicide note for some laughs. I know these people's mentality. You are just a piece of trash that needs to be removed to them
Excuse my ignorance, but what is "ctb"? I can think of many meanings for the abbreviation but none relate to suicide.

My situation is a bit different. I would have no one to read a note. I'm in a foreign country with no friends living a reclusive existence. I have no ties to my country of citizenship. No family ties, and absolutely not one person would know of my passing. I'm 64 and running out of money fast. I'm in surprisingly good health still, but I could not live a beggar's life as a homeless old man in a foreign land, or even my home country. Besides being broke, I'm seriously deep in debt too, and I only have enough to live a few more months. 64 is not the time to start again from zero. I plan to end my life with no ID to be found, so no one will know who I am. They will throw my corpse in an unmarked grave and that will be the end of it. Once you're gone, it doesn't matter what happens to your body. Death is the great equalizer. There's something therapeutic about looking death in the eye and not giving a shit.
 
B

boblong

Member
Mar 15, 2023
99
Excuse my ignorance, but what is "ctb"? I can think of many meanings for the abbreviation but none relate to suicide.

My situation is a bit different. I would have no one to read a note. I'm in a foreign country with no friends living a reclusive existence. I have no ties to my country of citizenship. No family ties, and absolutely not one person would know of my passing. I'm 64 and running out of money fast. I'm in surprisingly good health still, but I could not live a beggar's life as a homeless old man in a foreign land, or even my home country. Besides being broke, I'm seriously deep in debt too, and I only have enough to live a few more months. 64 is not the time to start again from zero. I plan to end my life with no ID to be found, so no one will know who I am. They will throw my corpse in an unmarked grave and that will be the end of it. Once you're gone, it doesn't matter what happens to your body. Death is the great equalizer. There's something therapeutic about looking death in the eye and not giving a shit.
ctb is short for " chase the bus" . Basically means " to meet death" , "to die" , "to suicide" , etc
 
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g56f32Z4n8#uExEuU*@

g56f32Z4n8#uExEuU*@

Member
May 7, 2023
22
Me too. My ambition would be to disappear first, and then ctb, make so that my body is not found or can't be identified. Sometimes I feel like I would like someone to miss me, but it's not of any consolation after you're dead. It's nice, instead, the idea of them thinking of you in a different life.
 
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DeathSleep

DeathSleep

Bang... Silence
May 25, 2023
153
I don't think I'll leave a note next time. Why would I? People already misunderstand me and believe whatever story they come up with anyways. I don't feel I owe an explanation at this point. People can think what they want to... I'll be gone.
 
S

sadshrike

Member
Feb 2, 2022
14
No one important will read it. No "family" or anyone who knows me will be able to read it. I plan to ctb far away from home location. The people that will find and process my corpse wont give a shit about what i put down. I don't care what happens to my body.

Believe me. The coroners/law enforcment will probably pass around your suicide note for some laughs. I know these people's mentality. You are just a piece of trash that needs to be removed to them
Oh man, I really feel this. Law enforcement is literally so traumatized by all the awful shit they see and have become numb to all of it that I can totally see them making fun of a suicide note. this world is so fucked up I gotta get out soon
 
crimsonpool

crimsonpool

hikikomori
May 15, 2023
96
yeah i dont want to either, for me there's no one who really deserves closure or anything like that. i don't plan on writing one
 
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Ambivalent1

Ambivalent1

Death is like a hug and its embrace is eternal
Apr 17, 2023
2,576
Those left behind are irrelevant. No one is owed closure through letters. People seem to have this weird idea that they own their friends and family members. It's clearly seen in how people respond to death. They grieve primarily for themselves.
 
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LastBusHome

LastBusHome

Member
Nov 6, 2022
37
Hardly the only one. I get the question though. It feels outside the norm at first glance but the decision to leave a note is just as personal as taking your life. So really, there is no "norm" to speak of. That said I personally go back and forth on it. On the one hand, if I had the kind of relationship with my family that enabled me to be emotionally honest then what I would have said in death I would already have said in life. On the other hand, I can understand and empathize with the need for some kind of absolution or closure. I know for sure I would leave a scheduled email or something for my partner. Everyone else well, idk. Probably some instructions to smooth over the transition. Maybe some reassurance that this was a measured decisions solely caused by and benefiting myself.
 
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D

Duality

Harmony in Duality
May 27, 2023
164
Those left behind are irrelevant. No one is owed closure through letters. People seem to have this weird idea that they own their friends and family members. It's clearly seen in how people respond to death. They grieve primarily for themselves.

I absolutely agree with everything you've said, 100%. The last part really hits home.

For myself, the effort of planning out my death is enough for me to not want to bother with putting in even more effort in writing a note. Besides, how could anyone understand why I feel the way I do? If they do understand then a note is not necessary, and if they don't understand then the note isn't worth it.
 
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leavingsoon99

I'm at peace... Finally.
Mar 16, 2023
722
Those left behind are irrelevant. No one is owed closure through letters. People seem to have this weird idea that they own their friends and family members. It's clearly seen in how people respond to death. They grieve primarily for themselves.
A person passed away that my coworkers knew. When they learned that it was a potential suicide, the responses were appalling. While one person who was his friend genuinely mourned, the rest who knew him mocked his passing. Saying he "went out like a bitch." (It was discovered that he OD'd) Calling him a coward. Others were passively surprised for second, then moved on. People seem to think that one needs their approval on leaving this life. It's so sick.
 
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Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
8,389
I'm confronted with this at the moment. On the one handside I don't want to leave a note, on the other handside, if I started to write sth, perhaps explaining the decision a bit, the loved ones would not understand the decision anyway.
 
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loopdaloop

-
Apr 16, 2023
324
After a lot of back and forth contemplation, I've decided not to leave a note too because I don't want to leave anything extra to poke fun at or be misconstrued.
 
G

graymatter

Member
Apr 12, 2023
22
I once read an article that not leaving a note was one of the most selfish things you can do, like a big "FUCK YOU" to your family, friends and the world. But I can't remember it well and I am too lazy to search for it

Also out of the 8 billion people living in the world, it is very unlikely you are the only one in anything

To some its the best Fuck You I can give them.

There's one I don't want to think its his fault. But I'm very used to be misunderstood. When I try to say nice things to people just to make them feel good they usually think I'm creepy or they feel offended. When I asked for help usually people play it down or wount take me serious at all. And thats not what I want to leave behind so I guess I would only write "It's not your fault".
 
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Ambivalent1

Ambivalent1

Death is like a hug and its embrace is eternal
Apr 17, 2023
2,576
A person passed away that my coworkers knew. When they learned that it was a potential suicide, the responses were appalling. While one person who was his friend genuinely mourned, the rest who knew him mocked his passing. Saying he "went out like a bitch." (It was discovered that he OD'd) Calling him a coward. Others were passively surprised for second, then moved on. People seem to think that one needs their approval on leaving this life. It's so sick.
Thankfully the suicidee is away from those demons and is ignorant of their words. I'm sure people will talk shit after I die but I'll never know LOL
 
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scamper

scamper

Nice to meet you
Mar 31, 2023
66
I used to want to share a lot of my thoughts to a large amount of people before I did ctb, but what happens after I do it has become less important to me as time has gone on, so I don't think I will anymore. I can still understand why some people would want to, of course.
 
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,592
I don't plan on leaving a note (both for safety and personal reasons). Furthermore, once I'm gone from this world (which will happen one day in the future) then whatever happens with the people still around is up to them and it's not like I can change their minds or how they react, so it would be futile and pointless for me to spend my energy, time, and resources to write a letter/note explaining my reasoning.
 
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leavingsoon99

I'm at peace... Finally.
Mar 16, 2023
722
Thankfully the suicidee is away from those demons and is ignorant of their words. I'm sure people will talk shit after I die but I'll never know LOL
They will about all of us. That's what the human does. They can stay in their hell. I escaped.
 
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Ambivalent1

Ambivalent1

Death is like a hug and its embrace is eternal
Apr 17, 2023
2,576
They will about all of us. That's what the human does. They can stay in their hell. I escaped.
And we had the courage to leave. We win. They think they win by lasting longer lol Masochism isn't a virtue. I'm starting to see that ctb isn't just about escaping pain. It's about following logic. Not engaging in this trivial pursuit called Life is logical.
 
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