phoenixx

phoenixx

Experienced
Apr 8, 2019
261
Am I a selfish/bad/horrible person for wanting to ctb? I feel like thats what everyone will think of me when I eventually do it.. but this life isn't for me. As much as I love my family, I can't spend the rest of my life in this fucking body. I cant keep battling all these thoughts and demons every day. I just need peace.
 
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P

Psilo

Arcanist
Dec 29, 2018
482
Its called being kind to yourself as someone else on this forum said.
 
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GeorgeJL

GeorgeJL

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2019
1,621
Depends on your situation. Do you have children? Are others very dependant on you like a elderly person that you have to take care of? If not then I won't think it would be selfish.
 
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phoenixx

phoenixx

Experienced
Apr 8, 2019
261
Depends on your situation. Do you have children? Are others very dependant on you like a elderly person that you have to take care of? If not then I won't think it would be selfish.

I dont have any children and no one relies on me..
 
Chalken

Chalken

Decaying
Nov 20, 2018
214
You're not selfish. The ones being selfish are those who keep others from killing themselves just so they wouldn't get hurt.
 
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phoenixx

phoenixx

Experienced
Apr 8, 2019
261
Have you given life an honest try?

I have, yes but I've been plagued by mental illness for 9+ years and have been struggling with other things too. I just dont want to fight any longer
 
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GeorgeJL

GeorgeJL

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2019
1,621
I have, yes but I've been plagued by mental illness for 9+ years and have been struggling with other things too. I just dont want to fight any longer
It seems like you have a ligitamate case for suicide without it being selfish but I don't know everything about you.
 
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phoenixx

phoenixx

Experienced
Apr 8, 2019
261
It seems like you have a ligitamate case for suicide without it being selfish but I don't know everything about you.

I'm 22. I haven't had any friends since i dropped out of high school at 15. I barley go out, have no social life or anything. I wont ever be able to get a full time job/career because I wouldnt be able to cope. Dont think I'll ever be able to move out alone because of my mental health (wouldn't be able to afford it without a job anyway). I cut/self harm pretty much everday. I wont ever be able to live normally. I'm never going to be normal or be able to cope with life properly. So theres no point in being alive, I'm just a big mess and I want to be at peace..
 
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