Literally every single time I finally feel better/happy, either something bad happens (usually minor, but bad enough to ruin my whole mood anyway), I make a stupid mistake, or someone ruins my good mood for whatever reason. But when I'm in a bad mood, good things happen to me. Every. SINGLE. TIME!!! I'm literally too scared to get too happy now because of this. Just feeling even the slightest bit of happiness and/or something good happening now makes me feel anxious and paranoid.
I always have to remind myself to never get too happy or else I'll regret it sooner or later, and that the good things that do happen are just set ups that would be used against me in the near future. If something bad doesn't happen either in the middle of me being happy/having a good time or immediately afterwards, then it'll come and bite me in the ass later (usually when I least expect it). And when that happens, I always get the intuition/gut feeling that something bad is lurking around the corner, just waiting for me to let my guard down for one second and strike.
It never freaking fails whenever I do fall for one of those "traps", thinking that "I'm just being paranoid", "I'm just overreacting", and that "My luck can't possibly be that bad" and that "I just need to try to be more positive
". Well, the jokes on me for never learning my lesson every time, every day. And the worst part? It's been this way for YEARS (for so many years, that I've honestly lost track)! 
I always have to remind myself to never get too happy or else I'll regret it sooner or later, and that the good things that do happen are just set ups that would be used against me in the near future. If something bad doesn't happen either in the middle of me being happy/having a good time or immediately afterwards, then it'll come and bite me in the ass later (usually when I least expect it). And when that happens, I always get the intuition/gut feeling that something bad is lurking around the corner, just waiting for me to let my guard down for one second and strike.
It never freaking fails whenever I do fall for one of those "traps", thinking that "I'm just being paranoid", "I'm just overreacting", and that "My luck can't possibly be that bad" and that "I just need to try to be more positive
". Well, the jokes on me for never learning my lesson every time, every day. And the worst part? It's been this way for YEARS (for so many years, that I've honestly lost track)!
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