Alternatives to standard treatments?

[Young.Werther]

I should maybe start by saying that I'm not sold on recovery, but I'm scared of screwing up CTB. Being a vegetable sounds absolutely terrifying and I do not want to end up in a hospital. SN sounds like it might be nice, but not sure how to obtain it right now. The alternatives I guess are jumping, hanging, maybe inert gas (need to read some more about the actual bag/mask). Jumping sounds terrifying and I'm worried that the accessible locations are not tall enough so I'd end up a vegetable or severely damaged but not gone. I'm not sure I could overcome SI with jumping either. Hanging seems meh, something to keep in back pocket. Inert gas I'm not sure how to deal with the mask/bag part (if anyone knows anything here would be appreciated), although I think I could get hold of nitrogen or argon or similar.

My point is that I feel stuck. No real bus ticket but i feel like my current situation is not tenable. There are some things I need to do still, so I'll be around one way or another for a while still. At this point I'm not very enthusiastic about recovery though. I tried therapy, even found a therapist that I thought I could trust. I was wrong and got sectioned for my mistake, so I'm not terribly keen on trying that again. I don't know … I get the sense that for recovery to work you have to really want it, and I'm not sure that I do. This wouldn't be problematic except that I can't seem to leave, too much of a coward or something. Does anyone have suggestions of anything worth trying? I'm not really big on drugs of any kind, I like being in control of myself. Maybe I'm asking for something which doesn't exist…

If anyone has suggestions of any sort (what to do/try/think about) I'd appreciate it. I put this in recovery mostly to get a wider range of responses. I'm open to CTB, I go back and forth day to day. On average probably leaning away from recovery but I guess I'm still here after all these years.

 

[Shrike]

When the professionals fail, it's up to the community to pick up the slack.

I don't believe one size fits all solutions make sense in most cases. Exercise and meditation are some standard ones but I assume you've heard of them already. So what are your main CTB drivers? Why do you feel that your current situation isn't tenable?

 

[Young.Werther]

When the professionals fail, it's up to the community to pick up the slack.

"Professionals." Right. I'm sorry this is just morbidly funny to me. I guess they're professionals in that they get paid for what they do, although I question any notion of competency. I appreciate the thought though.

Exercise and meditation are some standard ones but I assume you've heard of them already. So what are your main CTB drivers? Why do you feel that your current situation isn't tenable?

I think the driver tends to change. Right now I'm dreading that I'll have to say goodbye to a friend. Honestly they deserve much better than me and I think it's probably best that I am not in their life (at least as I am currently). I fully recognize that this is an isolating tendency, but I have hurt others by my presence before and am determined not to let it happen again. I do like this friend and don't want to hurt them. Besides that there's also a general dread of the future. I don't see a happy ending in the future, not even sure what that would look like. I think I'm a bit luckier than some others here in that I could probably find a decent job and whatnot if I tried enough (although trying is exhausting so maybe this is less possible than I think). I mean it's not that I don't think I could get some sense of happiness, it's that I don't even know what it would look like. I don't know what it is I should be trying for.

I think that this amplifies my present pains. I know that my dread over saying bye to my friend will pass eventually, but even once it does the other piece will still be there and experience suggests something else will come up. It also just gets lonely, and everything is exhausting. I think part of it is that I'm getting worn down. I used to feel like I had this limitless reserve of energy so that I could do anything if I really tried hard enough. My energy is not limitless and it's starting to show. I don't know how to keep up with everything.

I think I briefly looked at some recovery methods. I'm not super active so maybe that would help … Im skeptical because I don't see how lifting weights or running or whatever is going to address a lack of purpose. I also just don't know how to start. Like I haven't really done any exercise since middle school. I'm not sure what people do exactly when they go to the gym (or otherwise exercise). Likewise with meditation, I'm a total beginner. Any suggestions on how to get started?

Also thanks for taking the time to care.

 

[Shrike]

I think part of it is that I'm getting worn down. I used to feel like I had this limitless reserve of energy so that I could do anything if I really tried hard enough. My energy is not limitless and it's starting to show. I don't know how to keep up with everything.

I find this very relatable unfortunately. :( It's a difficult thing to explain and other people often mistake it for laziness. In my case I assume it's executive dysfunction but I'm not really sure. You can try checking it out at the doctor but otherwise you need to take charge of your energy management.

I'm not sure what people do exactly when they go to the gym (or otherwise exercise). Likewise with meditation, I'm a total beginner. Any suggestions on how to get started?

I've not been much of a gym person. If I do go to a gym I have a specific program in mind, like some form of weightlifting, for example (Starting Strength is a typical go-to). Often there are group classes and the like. You do want some kind of program that summarizes and balances muscle groups for some goal before you actually come to a gym, typically.

But for exercise I usually pick out something that's a fun activity in itself one way or another. I found it much easier to play some kind of sport than exercise for the sake of exercising. Bouldering, badminton. I've also done running on and off, but most people hate running. I don't really like running, either, but I like racing.

Nothing really helps with a lack of purpose, though. When we're happy, we do not really need a purpose. But when you do need something to keep you going, it's tough without one.

 

[Dot]

Therapy Methods Explained

"If you want to help someone you need to know something about them" - 'It's A Wonderful Life' Considering therapy but don't know where to start? Hopefully this can be a starting point about what all those different terms mean, and help to pick the right therapist. There are also options further...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Lts of info hre

Fl free t/ ask if hve n.e questns

 

[Kasumi]

Something "unusual" or "looked over" mhhh..

As easy as it sounds "giving yourself enough rest, the time for it, the things you need for that".
It can be something really unpractical, f.e. if your problems are caused by your job / schedule, then often it's hard for people to change it.

Idk the nature of your problems, but for depressive disorders a less common (and more risky) method I know of would be ketamine.

I also think that after we recognise our problems we also know the solution for them, it's just that it might be an unrealistic solution so we don't even consider it.
Taking myself as example, I can deal with my problems and live "normally" as long as I get enoug rest, physically and mentally.

Physically that means to get enough sleep, for me that's ~10h, less works too if I can sleep 2 or 3 times a day instead.
That also means to not exhaust myself and tackle exhausting activities one bit at a time instead of all at once.

Mentally that means to take enough breaks and do things that are important for comfort.
For some people that could be reading, listening to music, having a pet, going on walks outside, etc.
As well as not exhaust myself mentally, meaning the same as before, I can only do so much of mentally straining activities a day, or sometimes I can't do any of those for a few days.
For example while I like being around my friends, doing things together, I can only do that 2-3 days a week before I need to be by myself for the other days.

The real problem is that while that's a solution that works for me, todays society won't accept me like that.
There isn't a job where u can take breaks every 3h and sleep a few hours in between, only come in 3 days a week and don't have busy times where workload increases over the normal amount.
Just like most normal people can not indefinitely deal with overtime / overwork, or just in general stressful and busy times, I can't keep up with the world around me at their pace for long.

 

[Young.Werther]

Nothing really helps with a lack of purpose, though. When we're happy, we do not really need a purpose. But when you do need something to keep you going, it's tough without one.

Yeah I probably do need some more sleep lol. I'll have to see about the exercise bit. Meaning is tough. Thanks for the advice though!

Idk the nature of your problems, but for depressive disorders a less common (and more risky) method I know of would be ketamine.

Yeah I've seen some articles about it. Not super familiar but I don't really like the idea of not being in control of myself. Maybe I'm being too paranoid here (and there's probably some residual just say no to drugs programming as well).

I think one of the big things for me is that I don't know what I'd need to be ok. Like you have this idea of a fantasy job, I'm not sure what my version of that is. But then again, maybe even if I knew it wouldn't help (the job you describe does seem tough to find if it does exist). Best thing I can think of is something largely self directed (eg author, influencer) but these are tough to break into and probably still have crunch times (although maybe more self-imposed).

 

[Kasumi]

Yeah I've seen some articles about it. Not super familiar but I don't really like the idea of not being in control of myself. Maybe I'm being too paranoid here (and there's probably some residual just say no to drugs programming as well).

You aren't always on Ketamine in Ketamine therapy, you take it once or twice a week monitored by doctors, and yes it is a psychodelic, but afaik u probably won't remember much of it, it's also an anesthetic.
It's not exactly what you'd try first, rather what you try after other things failed.

 

[Little_Suzy]

To recover and be happy in life, you need a dependable, strong support system. This is when life becomes easier, and you experience less mood dysregulation and stress.

Whatever is stressing you out, find ways to reduce it; less worry equals more peace. Consider how your support network can assist you in this situation in ways that money cannot, by fostering positive relationships with others and making things work for you.

Life is like a game of Big Brother. You must win your own battles, have allies, and exercise caution when wielding power. Do not be a mooch! People don't have to like you, but you can appeal to their sensibilities. They will respect and want you around if you provide them with something they cannot get elsewhere.

Remain humble because when others perceive you as a threat, they refuse to get to know you. Nobody needs you when they don't know who you are.
When a big opportunity arises, others will pass you up because you cannot provide two solid references. Don't get cockblocked!

Cuba is another example. Everyone says it's great because Cuba has the best healthcare system in the world, and every Cuban is a trained doctor! Fidel recognized that developing hard currency power, such as a medical corps, was the most effective way to circumvent the embargo.

Cuban medical internationalism - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[divinemistress36]

Transcranial magnetic stimulation and craniosacral therapy

 

[Valky]

Hey, maybe this thread helps!!

Thread 'Therapy Methods & Alternatives Explained'
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/therapy-methods-alternatives-explained.139570/

 

[Young.Werther]

You aren't always on Ketamine in Ketamine therapy, you take it once or twice a week monitored by doctors, and yes it is a psychodelic, but afaik u probably won't remember much of it, it's also an anesthetic.
It's not exactly what you'd try first, rather what you try after other things failed.

Curious. Glancing over some of the articles about it (S-ketamine), it seems not dissimilar to existing medications in that we see it works without really knowing why. This is one of my big problems with medications is that we have no idea what's happening mechanistically so there could be something really malicious going on which we haven't picked up on because we don't understand the mechanism. It also looks super new (i mean research articles within past few years) so even less understanding presumably — i mean we've known about SSRIs for decades and as far as I can tell we don't understand why they work when they do and why not when they don't. We have decades more experience with SSRIs too. I mean apparently ketamine was developed as anasthesia in the seventies but we're only now finding out about other properties, which is not great as far as indicating how much we understand. I do appreciate the info though, it's interesting and something I'll have to keep tabs on.

Transcranial magnetic stimulation and craniosacral therapy

Huh never heard of this either. I'm not sure what craniosacral therapy is (i googled and it's some kind of massage?) but TMS is interesting. It sounds a bit like ECT which i don't like but apparently milder/less shocky and amnesia? Good to know about.

Hey, maybe this thread helps!!

Thread 'Therapy Methods & Alternatives Explained'
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/therapy-methods-alternatives-explained.139570/

Yep I've seen this before. I've tried talk therapy a few times, but the thing is that it requires so much trust and i have no trust. Like i said above, i thought l had found someone i could trust and that i liked, but this was a lie. They locked me up and I'm not super keen on trying again after that. The thing is that it's just such a screwy power dynamic. The "professional" has all the power and i have none. There is nothing to stop them from locking me up if they want. Yes they're supposed to have evidence to back it up but at the end of the day it's their word against mine and who's going to believe me? Certainly not the hospital that gets to charge me thousands of dollars for locking me up.