FireFox

FireFox

Enlightened
Apr 8, 2020
1,697
Experiencing guys rejecting me and boys at school making regularly fun of my appearance made not like my appearance. I was confident as teenage girl, I had the confidence to talk boys but guys rejected me while all the other girls at school were getting boyfriends.

I used to be so jealous of girls in my school who had blonde hair because the boys always noticed them, saw them as pretty, were nicer to them and were always interested in them whereas me having black hair, dark brown eyes and brown skin I just felt my features were so boring with nothing standing out. It didn't help either experiencing guys I liked including the non white always picked the white girls over me. I envied these girls and I wished I was them in being noticed and desired and wanted. In adulthood I still do have a jealously towards blonde haired blue eyed women because of the male rejection.

Last month I went travelling to Italy and spent a week in Venice. When I was at Gatwick Airport I was getting male attention from the British men I was in shock because all my life I was invisible to men and always ignored. In Venice when I was visiting one of the attractions I got so much male attention from the Italian menand the men were so nice. I did a lot of socialising and talking to people during my trip.

My family think it is a change in my appearance. It was surreal because all my life I was the invisible girl then woman. I now realise just because that guy I wanted rejected me it does not mean I am unattractive his rejection of me is his own personal opinion, opinions are not fact.

My confidence and self esstem is starting to improve
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,737
I'm so pleased for you! ❤️ Congratulations and well done for getting this far, it obviously paid off ❤️
 
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Pluto

Pluto

Meowing to go out
Dec 27, 2020
4,004
Happy to hear you've finally found your worth.

As much as our society's fixation with external beauty is far from ideal, we have to work with it to some extent. I would advise you to put effort into a fitness regime, as the payoff is a further boost in your physical and mental wellbeing. Wishing you the best always.
 
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O

outatime_85

Warlock
May 17, 2022
774
It is good to read that you are making progress and experiencing some form of happiness, and it is always good to read that people here are making progress, however small it may be.

That said, keep your head up and your eyes open because, even though you thought no one had eyes for you or wanted or needed you, you now know otherwise.

To quote Bruce Lee, "It's like a finger pointing away to the moon. Don't concentrate on the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory!"
 
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Venus13

Venus13

Experienced
Oct 2, 2022
233
This is amazing. You deserve these experiences and that sense of freedom from the past. I'm happy for you.
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
7,258
@firefox that is absolutely FANTASTIC to hear this. I am so happy for you.
 
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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,559
Congratulations:)
 
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FireFox

FireFox

Enlightened
Apr 8, 2020
1,697
I'm so pleased for you! ❤️ Congratulations and well done for getting this far, it obviously paid off ❤️
@jodes2 Thank you 😊

Sorry for my late reply a lot has happened in my life so I have been offline a lot. I was never expecting this to happen. All my life I was always ignored and overlooked by guys while all the girls and women around me got male love and attention. It hurt watching on the sidelines.

Being open and honest about the pain this caused me I have received online hate, dismissal, criticism and judgment from other women in online social media spaces and communities for women. The whole thing made feel nobody understood how I felt and at times felt like I was wasn't a real woman because my life experiences were not in line with the majority of women even having other women accuse me of being a troll was actually hurtful.
It is good to read that you are making progress and experiencing some form of happiness, and it is always good to read that people here are making progress, however small it may be.

That said, keep your head up and your eyes open because, even though you thought no one had eyes for you or wanted or needed you, you now know otherwise.

To quote Bruce Lee, "It's like a finger pointing away to the moon. Don't concentrate on the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory!"
@outatime_85 Sorry for my late reply lot has happened in my life so I have been offline a lot. I was never expecting this to happen. All my life I was always ignored and overlooked by guys while all the girls and women around me got male love and attention. It hurt watching on the sidelines.

In my new job I have been getting on well my work colleagues and I have even been receiving male attention. It has been exciting to experience because all my life I have always been ignored by guys. I was confident as a teenage girl and in my 20s but guys still rejected me.

Being open and honest about the pain this caused me I have received online hate, dismissal, criticism and judgment from other women in online social media spaces and communities for women. The whole thing made feel nobody understood how I felt and at times felt like I was wasn't a real woman because my life experiences were not in line with the majority of women even having other women accuse me of being a troll was actually hurtful. The online judgment, lack of empathy and pure online hate from other women in online communities for women made me feel like I was not a woman.

Loads of women really underestimate the impact frequent male rejection and never being desired can have on a person. I do feel too different from all the other women because of my experiences and women my age being unable to relate to me and I can not relate to them either.
@firefox that is absolutely FANTASTIC to hear this. I am so happy for you.
@locked*n*loaded sorry I have been distant lately so many amazing things has been happening in my life. I went travelling first then when I came back to the UK I had a job interview for this job I applied for and I was successful. It is a WFH and majority of my work colleagues live in different towns and cities across the South of England but sometimes the company organises events in the office.

In my new job I have been getting on well my work colleagues and I have even been receiving male attention. In one of the office days at work I ended up going on a walk with two of my male work colleagues and we had so much fun. It was wonderful experiencing a man wanting to spend time with me. One of the men even emailed me the next day saying good morning and looking forward to seeing me around.

It has been exciting to experience because all my life I have always been ignored by guys. I was confident as a teenage girl and in my 20s but guys still rejected me. I do feel too different from all the other women because of my experiences. Opening up about my insecurities in the past especially this year I have gotten so much judgement, criticism, lack of empathy and online hate from other women in online communities for women made me feel like I was not a woman because none of the women online could not relate to me and my experiences and how I saw myself because of my experiences.
 
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SFB123

Member
Apr 5, 2021
49
Experiencing guys rejecting me and boys at school making regularly fun of my appearance made not like my appearance. I was confident as teenage girl, I had the confidence to talk boys but guys rejected me while all the other girls at school were getting boyfriends.

I used to be so jealous of girls in my school who had blonde hair because the boys always noticed them, saw them as pretty, were nicer to them and were always interested in them whereas me having black hair, dark brown eyes and brown skin I just felt my features were so boring with nothing standing out. It didn't help either experiencing guys I liked including the non white always picked the white girls over me. I envied these girls and I wished I was them in being noticed and desired and wanted. In adulthood I still do have a jealously towards blonde haired blue eyed women because of the male rejection.

Last month I went travelling to Italy and spent a week in Venice. When I was at Gatwick Airport I was getting male attention from the British men I was in shock because all my life I was invisible to men and always ignored. In Venice when I was visiting one of the attractions I got so much male attention from the Italian menand the men were so nice. I did a lot of socialising and talking to people during my trip.

My family think it is a change in my appearance. It was surreal because all my life I was the invisible girl then woman. I now realise just because that guy I wanted rejected me it does not mean I am unattractive his rejection of me is his own personal opinion, opinions are not fact.

My confidence and self esstem is starting to improve
I'm so happy to hear that you no longer feel that way. I've recently read some of your threads you posted over the years. I came across them because I typed in how I was feeling into the search bar and my searches brought me to your threads. Only difference is that I'm a guy and I don't think I personally will ever overcome my unattractive appearance. I'm so glad that you acknowledged your worth, you deserve so much more happiness too :) . With me, I'm inherently unattractive though so there's no eureka moment/realisation that I'll have. I'm 22, hopeless & helpless imo.
@jodes2 Thank you 😊

Sorry for my late reply a lot has happened in my life so I have been offline a lot. I was never expecting this to happen. All my life I was always ignored and overlooked by guys while all the girls and women around me got male love and attention. It hurt watching on the sidelines.

Being open and honest about the pain this caused me I have received online hate, dismissal, criticism and judgment from other women in online social media spaces and communities for women. The whole thing made feel nobody understood how I felt and at times felt like I was wasn't a real woman because my life experiences were not in line with the majority of women even having other women accuse me of being a troll was actually hurtful.

@outatime_85 Sorry for my late reply lot has happened in my life so I have been offline a lot. I was never expecting this to happen. All my life I was always ignored and overlooked by guys while all the girls and women around me got male love and attention. It hurt watching on the sidelines.

In my new job I have been getting on well my work colleagues and I have even been receiving male attention. It has been exciting to experience because all my life I have always been ignored by guys. I was confident as a teenage girl and in my 20s but guys still rejected me.

Being open and honest about the pain this caused me I have received online hate, dismissal, criticism and judgment from other women in online social media spaces and communities for women. The whole thing made feel nobody understood how I felt and at times felt like I was wasn't a real woman because my life experiences were not in line with the majority of women even having other women accuse me of being a troll was actually hurtful. The online judgment, lack of empathy and pure online hate from other women in online communities for women made me feel like I was not a woman.

Loads of women really underestimate the impact frequent male rejection and never being desired can have on a person. I do feel too different from all the other women because of my experiences and women my age being unable to relate to me and I can not relate to them either.

@locked*n*loaded sorry I have been distant lately so many amazing things has been happening in my life. I went travelling first then when I came back to the UK I had a job interview for this job I applied for and I was successful. It is a WFH and majority of my work colleagues live in different towns and cities across the South of England but sometimes the company organises events in the office.

In my new job I have been getting on well my work colleagues and I have even been receiving male attention. In one of the office days at work I ended up going on a walk with two of my male work colleagues and we had so much fun. It was wonderful experiencing a man wanting to spend time with me. One of the men even emailed me the next day saying good morning and looking forward to seeing me around.

It has been exciting to experience because all my life I have always been ignored by guys. I was confident as a teenage girl and in my 20s but guys still rejected me. I do feel too different from all the other women because of my experiences. Opening up about my insecurities in the past especially this year I have gotten so much judgement, criticism, lack of empathy and online hate from other women in online communities for women made me feel like I was not a woman because none of the women online could not relate to me and my experiences and how I saw myself because of my experiences.
Your story is such an inspirational one! I hope it's nothing but spiraling upwards for you from here onwards!! ☺
 
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lofticries

lofticries

obedear
Feb 27, 2021
1,470
Oh wow this is a huge improvement in mood compared to how you were in your other threads. I'm happy for you.😊

I'm glad you got a boost of confidence from your travels. Hope you find a role model or a muse of some kind who is also a person of color. Because there are so many black women of many shades and sizes who are absolutely killing it right now. I know blue eyes and blonde hair is the world's aesthetic due to it being promoted the most. But that doesn't mean it's the only type of beauty.
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,032
Experiencing guys rejecting me and boys at school making regularly fun of my appearance made not like my appearance. I was confident as teenage girl, I had the confidence to talk boys but guys rejected me while all the other girls at school were getting boyfriends.

I used to be so jealous of girls in my school who had blonde hair because the boys always noticed them, saw them as pretty, were nicer to them and were always interested in them whereas me having black hair, dark brown eyes and brown skin I just felt my features were so boring with nothing standing out. It didn't help either experiencing guys I liked including the non white always picked the white girls over me. I envied these girls and I wished I was them in being noticed and desired and wanted. In adulthood I still do have a jealously towards blonde haired blue eyed women because of the male rejection.

Last month I went travelling to Italy and spent a week in Venice. When I was at Gatwick Airport I was getting male attention from the British men I was in shock because all my life I was invisible to men and always ignored. In Venice when I was visiting one of the attractions I got so much male attention from the Italian menand the men were so nice. I did a lot of socialising and talking to people during my trip.

My family think it is a change in my appearance. It was surreal because all my life I was the invisible girl then woman. I now realise just because that guy I wanted rejected me it does not mean I am unattractive his rejection of me is his own personal opinion, opinions are not fact.

My confidence and self esstem is starting to improve
No matter who or what we are there is someone on this planet that likes us. Love to you and yes my dear, there are hot people in every color and size imaginable.
 
BeansOfRequirement

BeansOfRequirement

Behind the guilt was compassion
Jan 26, 2021
5,744
Called it a year back.
 
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Csmith8827

Csmith8827

Don't you listen to your heart? (Listen to it...)
Oct 26, 2019
894
I used to think there was something wrong with my looks growing up as well cause no girls would date me for longer than 1day at a time...turns out it was all just apart of an evil ploy. I was actually quite good-looking and still am to this day. I think if you look hard enough you can find something (aspect/characteristic/feature) to like in almost everybody. They do have exceptions to the rule...but nearly everybody has some likeable quality...you just have to look. :smiling:
 
BeansOfRequirement

BeansOfRequirement

Behind the guilt was compassion
Jan 26, 2021
5,744
@GenesAndEnvironment wow oh really what did you say :)
Told you try a dating app, because you'd get the same results (most likely better, actually) there.
 
Zegers

Zegers

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,761
It's not a change in your appearance nor attitude, it's a change of geographical location. Sometimes we are invisible in some places but not in others, it's finding your place where you feel more valued. Some people are unable to see beyond the border of their country.

I would like to do what you did but no longer want to live without health and certain conditions.
 
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savoytruffle

savoytruffle

Student
Mar 31, 2022
197
im so happy for you this post made me smile wide
 

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