FireFox
Enlightened
- Apr 8, 2020
- 1,697
Experiencing guys rejecting me and boys at school making regularly fun of my appearance made not like my appearance. I was confident as teenage girl, I had the confidence to talk boys but guys rejected me while all the other girls at school were getting boyfriends.
I used to be so jealous of girls in my school who had blonde hair because the boys always noticed them, saw them as pretty, were nicer to them and were always interested in them whereas me having black hair, dark brown eyes and brown skin I just felt my features were so boring with nothing standing out. It didn't help either experiencing guys I liked including the non white always picked the white girls over me. I envied these girls and I wished I was them in being noticed and desired and wanted. In adulthood I still do have a jealously towards blonde haired blue eyed women because of the male rejection.
Last month I went travelling to Italy and spent a week in Venice. When I was at Gatwick Airport I was getting male attention from the British men I was in shock because all my life I was invisible to men and always ignored. In Venice when I was visiting one of the attractions I got so much male attention from the Italian menand the men were so nice. I did a lot of socialising and talking to people during my trip.
My family think it is a change in my appearance. It was surreal because all my life I was the invisible girl then woman. I now realise just because that guy I wanted rejected me it does not mean I am unattractive his rejection of me is his own personal opinion, opinions are not fact.
My confidence and self esstem is starting to improve
I used to be so jealous of girls in my school who had blonde hair because the boys always noticed them, saw them as pretty, were nicer to them and were always interested in them whereas me having black hair, dark brown eyes and brown skin I just felt my features were so boring with nothing standing out. It didn't help either experiencing guys I liked including the non white always picked the white girls over me. I envied these girls and I wished I was them in being noticed and desired and wanted. In adulthood I still do have a jealously towards blonde haired blue eyed women because of the male rejection.
Last month I went travelling to Italy and spent a week in Venice. When I was at Gatwick Airport I was getting male attention from the British men I was in shock because all my life I was invisible to men and always ignored. In Venice when I was visiting one of the attractions I got so much male attention from the Italian menand the men were so nice. I did a lot of socialising and talking to people during my trip.
My family think it is a change in my appearance. It was surreal because all my life I was the invisible girl then woman. I now realise just because that guy I wanted rejected me it does not mean I am unattractive his rejection of me is his own personal opinion, opinions are not fact.
My confidence and self esstem is starting to improve