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T

TBONTB

Enlightened
May 31, 2025
1,114
I read a lot here about alcohol or substances being part of members depression, and if it being a tool for relief. I rarely hear people say they've tried a 12 step program. I'm not here to suggest anyone should recover unless they want to, but for anyone who does want to 12 step groups can be handy

I've spent two decades in recovery, and obviously my emotional pain isn't cured. But if you haven't tried it, and you think you'd like to avoid CTBing, doesn't hurt to try.

A couple of comments

1) Find a meeting where you can talk to people. Lurking won't really work, although it's okay for a little while if you just want to get the vibe
2) Ignore the God stuff if it doesn't work for you, that's optional
3) Find someone you can talk to after the meeting about how not to take a drink or a drug. One on one is really where you can learn a lot
4) 12 step will be for support with alcohol not suicide, this site is still good for suicide discussion.
5) People will want you to get sober if you want to, but it's your choice. They aren't counselors or professionals you need to comply with. It's like this site in some ways..just people talking to each other



My goal here was to offer a resource if anyone genuinely is interested rather than suggesting this is what everyone should do, please just ignore if it's not your jam.
 
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KillingPain267

KillingPain267

Visionary
Apr 15, 2024
2,086
In my country we don't really have AA, but we have other newer approaches. For me, alcohol gave relief for a while, I'm not afraid to admit that.
 
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Parasitism

Parasitism

Member
May 27, 2025
78
My biggest problem with AA is that it's an abstinence program. Sometimes drinking helps me to numb suicidal impulses and or self harm. Sometimes it doesn't. I was sober for 2 years once and was admitted to the psychiatric ward 3 times during that period. I couldn't pull myself out of mental breakdowns like I can with drink/drugs as self medication. I learnt that being completely sober while dealing with a personality disorder and trauma turned out ultimately worse. Saying that sometimes drugs/alcohol is needed in my life falls on deaf eyes in AA. I felt judged and not believed. Ultimately I didn't feel in control of my own life narrative while in AA.
 
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T

TBONTB

Enlightened
May 31, 2025
1,114
That makes sense that it isn't a fit for you. Personally I know I have to be abstinence based because I become completely non-functional so fast if I drink.
If it works for you, great, but otherwise avoid AA and other 12 steps stuff. It's a religious cult: https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Alcoholics_Anonymous
I agree with find what works for you and glad you posted another option I would just say I am not religious at all, and no one care.
 
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Unbearable Mr. Bear

Unbearable Mr. Bear

Sometimes, all you need is a hug...
May 9, 2025
990
That makes sense that it isn't a fit for you. Personally I know I have to be abstinence based because I become completely non-functional so fast if I drink.

I agree with find what works for you and glad you posted another option I would just say I am not religious at all, and no one care.
Oh yeah, they're not interested if you're religious, but the whole thing is built on christianity and it accepts ppl of other faiths expectant they will turn christian. If you didn't turn, well, there's still hundreds of others to be converted. Some surely will.

The RationalWiki article I listed has a lot of secular alternatives that are not cults nor religious. I hope people find them enlightening.
 
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