Help Afraid of being lonely, not alone. Wanting advice.

[phantomisgone]

I'm afraid that I'm going to live a lonely life.

2 weeks from now, I graduate from college. I will be on my own for a long time. I don't have a lot of close friends, I'm not as close with family and I tend to keep to myself. After giving it some thought, it's starting to get to me on how I will just be on my own for XX amounts of years. Paying my bills, going to work and trying to navigate the adult world.

Now I like being alone, but it's going to be a really... really... really long time that I will be in isolation. I'm projecting to at least 50 years. I don't know how I can manage that and that is what makes me terrified.

I have hobbies and I know of some people, but I it's the timespan that makes it scaryfor me.

Does anyone have any advice or tips for this? Anything helps.

 

[Diceroller90]

I am working through those thoughts right now.

First question I am asking myself is why do I believe I am doomed to a lonely life and if that belief is accurate. Its not worth going down the rest of the rabbit hole if my initial assessment of myself is wrong.

So, what about you?

 

[Forever Sleep]

May I ask, do you suffer with things like social anxiety? I live alone, work alone. I've been alone for over 20 years. For me though, I'm fairly lucky in that I'm not bothered that much by loneliness. I actually enjoy being alone. I suppose it concerns me that it may eventually hit. Still for now, the anxiety around being around people is far greater than me being on my own. So, this life suits me.

I would agree with @Diceroller90 , it's not an absolute given that you will be alone and lonely but, it will depend heavily on you. If you want people in your life, you'll need to put in the effort to find them. When we are lucky enough to find people we click with, then it takes effort to maintain the friendship. People meet in all sorts of ways though. Evening or short courses, coach trips, even sports or social clubs. I think friendship can be an achievable goal but, like many things in life- it requires a great deal of effort, trust and risk.