Hi, I suffer of major depression but trying my best not to end my life. I am already going to therapy and take medications.. but some days I just want to throw myself out of the window. My next appointment with my psychiatrist is next week; I tried going to a mental health facility last friday to seek for help but I was sent home and just told "to go for a stroll to breathe some fresh air". Whenever I am asked how I feel I just say "I think about death frequently", I never tell "I want to kill myself" because I don't want to be sent to a psych yard again. I'm actually trying to resist the urge but I'm not given any help. I was told ketamine may help but public healthcare is not passing me this kind of treatment (I'm in Italy). I already asked to be put on psyllobicine (mushrooms) but I haven't head back. Private healthcare is extremely pricy.. my mom should apply for a mortgage on the house in order to pay for the treatment. I don't know how to keep bearing all this pain..
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