About suicide partners

[veryhappyhuman]

I think much has already been discussed about the case when one partner survives and the other partner succeeds in ctb. So as terrifying as that possibility is, I'm not gonna talk about that.

My question is, how are people seeking partners not worried about potential harassment to their family from the other partner's family, in the case where both do successfully ctb?

We've all seen the lengths bereaved family members go to in order to seek "justice" for their dead loved one. They try to shut down forums like these, books, websites that sell even paraphernalia etc etc. IMO, this is really their attempt to find closure by pushing blame elsewhere. So what would stop them from holding the other partner's family responsible and take them to court or otherwise harass them, blaming them for somehow influencing/brainwashing their loved one into ctb?

I really need a partner too, I even posted once on the Partners Megathread before quietly deleting it within minutes. It's precisely because of the above, I'm worried that my family will be dragged through the mud by the other partner's family post ctb. My old parents can't even fight back.

Thoughts? Has this ever happened or am I overthinking this?

 

[CursedSoul]

what you could do is search for someone without a family/family that cares about them, so you could get both a partner and one that won't be missed, or release a note/recording of your last moments to prove the other has done nothing to influence you etc... But good luck anyway, your request is like asking "i want to suicide, but i don't want to die" there is solutions, but this will be a very hard problem to solve, best of luck !

 

[PrincessInWhite]

I think much has already been discussed about the case when one partner survives and the other partner succeeds in ctb. So as terrifying as that possibility is, I'm not gonna talk about that.

My question is, how are people seeking partners not worried about potential harassment to their family from the other partner's family, in the case where both do successfully ctb?

We've all seen the lengths bereaved family members go to in order to seek "justice" for their dead loved one. They try to shut down forums like these, books, websites that sell even paraphernalia etc etc. IMO, this is really their attempt to find closure by pushing blame elsewhere. So what would stop them from holding the other partner's family responsible and take them to court or otherwise harass them, blaming them for somehow influencing/brainwashing their loved one into ctb?

I really need a partner too, I even posted once on the Partners Megathread before quietly deleting it within minutes. It's precisely because of the above, I'm worried that my family will be dragged through the mud by the other partner's family post ctb. My old parents can't even fight back.

Thoughts? Has this ever happened or am I overthinking this?

I'm with you. I could and would never do a partners situation for this very reason. SO much Could go wrong. If the other person dies and you don't and you wind up being saved for whatever reason you will very likely be in legal trouble, not to mention it feels like a grey ethical area for me…both parties feel pressured to do it to not let the other down and that feels less like true free choice to me. Also like you said, the poor families after. I understand wanting company when you go for sure but I could never.

 

[london3]

I think much has already been discussed about the case when one partner survives and the other partner succeeds in ctb. So as terrifying as that possibility is, I'm not gonna talk about that.

My question is, how are people seeking partners not worried about potential harassment to their family from the other partner's family, in the case where both do successfully ctb?

We've all seen the lengths bereaved family members go to in order to seek "justice" for their dead loved one. They try to shut down forums like these, books, websites that sell even paraphernalia etc etc. IMO, this is really their attempt to find closure by pushing blame elsewhere. So what would stop them from holding the other partner's family responsible and take them to court or otherwise harass them, blaming them for somehow influencing/brainwashing their loved one into ctb?

I really need a partner too, I even posted once on the Partners Megathread before quietly deleting it within minutes. It's precisely because of the above, I'm worried that my family will be dragged through the mud by the other partner's family post ctb. My old parents can't even fight back.

Thoughts? Has this ever happened or am I overthinking this?

I did think having someone there in my last moments will provide comfort.

But in the UK you could be arrested for assisting a suicide if you get caught.

This is not even mentioning if one of you dies and the other backs out, opening yourself up to potential abuse from a complete stranger in your last moments and many other things.

There are far too many downsides i feel in getting a partner to ctb so i will not do it.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

It would be nice to have a partner, but just as the OP and others said, there are way too many potential pitfalls. I guess each could write very clear letters stating that they don't want the other's families harassed, that your ctb has nothing to do with them, and your ctb is not their fault. Say you don't want your legacy tarnished by something like this. As far as one being successful, and the other not, that's a bigger issue in my opinion. that just opens the doors for all kinds of legal troubles, not to mention possibly ending up in far worse shape than before the ctb attempt. I can understand the "comfort" in having someone to go with, but I think it's better to just go alone, all things considered.

 

[veryhappyhuman]

I guess each could write very clear letters stating that they don't want the other's families harassed, that your ctb has nothing to do with them, and your ctb is not their fault.

Yes, this is the way if we ARE doing the partner thing. Problem is, you can't really force your partner to do anything -- some of our own SaSu-ers have said they won't even bother leaving a note (and I very much empathise with that), let alone add specific things to the note like absolving partner's family of culpability etc. So while I can write the note absolving my partner and their family from any blame, I can't really expect/force reciprocity. I suppose one could, BEFORE partnering, make it a pre-condition that they'd need to mutually write this down in their last note.

It's just sad how even little things like this are difficult and complicated when it comes to ctb. I guess I too will need to forgo a partner. Lived alone, will die alone too.

 

[24601]

Find someone whose family won't miss them or find out. There are many people that fit the bill like me (although I want to go alone so not open to offers).

 

[locked*n*loaded]

It's just sad how even little things like this are difficult and complicated when it comes to ctb. I guess I too will need to forgo a partner. Lived alone, will die alone too.

I hear you on this loud and clear. I live alone and have been alone a LONG time. I'd really like to not have to go out alone, but not sure, because of everything mentioned, how great of an idea that really is. It could work if you happen to find the right person and get on the same wavelength. Who knows?

 

[JustTooHard]

I would love a partner

 

[Hope:-)]

I would love a partner. Just want someone normal who is very serious about this and who either has n, (as I don't,) or who preferably will do the sn method. Oh, and they have to be at least mis 30ish and female. Apparently this is pretty hard to find.Arrgh don't know why it has to be so difficult to organise this stuff.No, I'm not worried about any harrassment. That doesn't generally happen :-)

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[JustTooHard]

I would love a partner. Just want someone normal who is very serious about this and who either has n, (as I don't,) or who preferably will do the sn method. Oh, and they have to be at least mis 30ish and female. Apparently this is pretty hard to find.Arrgh don't know why it has to be so difficult to organise this stuff.No, I'm not worried about any harrassment. That doesn't generally happen :-)

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Where are you?

 

[Hope:-)]

Where are you?

UK

 

[TheBeautifulNightma]

I would love a partner. Just want someone normal who is very serious about this and who either has n, (as I don't,) or who preferably will do the sn method. Oh, and they have to be at least mis 30ish and female. Apparently this is pretty hard to find.Arrgh don't know why it has to be so difficult to organise this stuff.No, I'm not worried about any harrassment. That doesn't generally happen :-)

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I check off everything except that I'm male.

 

[Pedronte]

Am I the only one who doesn't want a partner in CTB? I don't feel comfortable knowing someone will see me dying.

 

[Doombox]

Am I the only one who doesn't want a partner in CTB? I don't feel comfortable knowing someone will see me dying.

You aren't the only one. Not just a partner in CTB, but a stranger. I don't know what's appealing about that.

 

[Lone Wanderer]

You aren't the only one. Not just a partner in CTB, but a stranger. I don't know what's appealing about that.

I don't mind dying with someone else, it just gots be someone I know tho.

 

[Pedronte]

You aren't the only one. Not just a partner in CTB, but a stranger. I don't know what's appealing about that.

Same for me. I don't see how it could be comfortable.