Discussion 12 hours before ctb and what do you believe in after death?

[love_peep]

I already wrote a farewell post a day ago, but I decided to write another one and ask myself what do you believe in after death.
about the method
as for my method, it is tough but working, judging by the video, where people also tried to pull off a trick, but they did not succeed instead. In general, since I live alone and I have one big bathtub and handcuffs, I'll tie myself up and do the same trick as in the video, only I don't know how it's done, so I'll just drown
Why did I decide to leave this world so early?
it so happened in my 19 years that I am an orphan and I have no one somewhere in the month of April I began a severe depression accompanied by apathy, I always want to cry but you can't and you are very aggressive to yourself. Plus I hate myself.
during these 19 years of my life, I got a lot of experience while everyone was having fun, I tried to develop myself. and at the age of 19, I know English, I can work with servers, I can play guitar, I can assemble a Rubik's cube, I can weld because I am a welder by profession, I can program various programs, write games, websites and even mobile applications. I carried out freelance orders, received money and everything would be fine, but depression forced me to give up all my hobbies, I'm not interested in anything, I'm now a dummy who does nothing but eat and sleep.
it is very sad that I have to leave so early because I have tried everything from medications to psychilogs and psychiatric hospitals, but unfortunately there is not much medical care in Russia and I still can't cope with these thoughts and apathy and I can't stop doing self harm. The only thing I am sure of is that all suffering will stop when I leave this world.


and at the end of my last post, I would like to thank all the participants of this forum for their support, because this rorum has become a family for me. There are also some people whom I want to thank separately and these are:
@LoiteringClouds , @Vizzy, @Red Desert and @FuneralCry for his help to me on this forum.
As for what I think awaits me after death? To be honest, I don't even know, but I think it's better to love there than here

goodbye guys and good luck

 

[(¥)]

you ascommplish greatky in small time. ltajke care.

 

[Red Desert]

For some reason, I believe by default in reincarnation in a few tens or even hundreds of years, on the same planet. Maybe it looks primitive, but I'd like to be reborn right here, only in a more advanced world, happy and with good mental health

What are your ideas?

 

[numbed one]

I dont beleive in réincarnation but WE will just vanish liké thé way WE were before being born

 

[LoiteringClouds]

Hello @love_peep,
I'm so sad, but I'm going to be here today.

during these 19 years of my life, I got a lot of experience while everyone was having fun, I tried to develop myself. and at the age of 19, I know English, I can work with servers, I can play guitar, I can assemble a Rubik's cube, I can weld because I am a welder by profession, I can program various programs, write games, websites and even mobile applications. I carried out freelance orders, received money and everything would be fine, but depression forced me to give up all my hobbies, I'm not interested in anything, I'm now a dummy who does nothing but eat and sleep.

I'm astonished how talented you are but I'm so sorry that now you feel like you can't do anything productive. I might be able to relate - I once was a software developer, but enormous pressure of the job crushed me and I developed bipolar II, instead of software, quit the job and left IT industry altogether.
I become unemployed, returned to my parents' home, and my mood went into tailspin because of huge shame, boredom and feeling of inadequacy. I made several stupid attempts (a method with very low completion rate) and I ended up in a psych ward.
I simply couldn't keep myself from attempting, since I couldn't bear the lack of respect due to unemployment.

As for what I think awaits me after death? To be honest, I don't even know, but I think it's better to love there than here

I don't think much about afterlife, but there is eternal oblivion I guess. What it's like not to exist at all is beyond my imagination, but I'm somewhat curious.

May your suffering cease,
And you find blissful peace 🕊

Love,
LoiteringClouds

 

[Departme]

Peace and tranquillity I hope for you whether an afterlife or not. I did once believe in an afterlife but over time my views have changed as I cannot see how any greater 'force' would allow the events and evil that exists on our planet to happen. Yet on one level we are all born of the Universe and will return to the Universe in due time, energy cannot be destroyed only converted so in that way the spirit of your essence will exist for eternity whether consciously aware or not. Hugs and best wishes to you.

 

[Riu]

I personally believe there is nothing after we die, but if it's not the case, I hope you can find some rest in the afterlife.

 

[FuneralCry]

I just believe that after we finally leave this this world we simply cease existing, there is nothingness for all eternity and to me such a thing is ideal, it's the only relief for me, the thought of being permanently unaware and unable to suffer in this hellish reality is perfection to me. But anyway farewell, I wish you the best with your plans, I hope you find freedom from all suffering.

 

[MrDarkness]

I believe in heaven, I hope your able to go peacefully, I'll try to join you in heaven as soon as possible. Maybe we can party and get drunk lol

 

[!MIA!]

I wish you the best of luck on departing. I hope you may find peace ♡

 

[todiefor]

I really hope there is absolutely just nothing, u just don't exist anymore your consciousness is gone, no happiness but also no sadness, no awareness but also no unawareness. I really don't hope for there to be an after life or reincarnation, I don't think I want to leave this life to just enter another one.

 

[TheDyingSolarSystem]

I wish you luck on your CTB plan, and I hope you go peacefully. Honestly, for me, I believe in God, so I think there's a heaven. But there may be a possibility that There's nothing too. Either is fine with me, just along as I find peace.

 

[Departme]

I really hope there is absolutely just nothing, u just don't exist anymore your consciousness is gone, no happiness but also no sadness, no awareness but also no unawareness. I really don't hope for there to be an after life or reincarnation, I don't think I want to leave this life to just enter another one.

I think this is the reality thankfully, if by a small chance there is something beyond then it can be no worse than this world which is akin to hell for so many.