Discussion 1 year for a better life? or CTB? If you had the option between CTB and getting your life together, which would you choose?

[ccake]

If you were in a position where you wanted to CTB, but had the option to get your life somewhat together, would you take it?

The downside to this process is that it takes time, effort, and patience maybe around 5 to 7 months, or even up to a year. It will require energy and perseverance.

The upside, though, is that after going through it, you'll feel better not just slightly or significantly, but simply better than when you were considering CTB. In short, you'll be fairly happy, enjoy life more, and feel like you finally have a reason to live.

Or, you could choose to CTB and not have to worry about any of this just cease to exist in peace. But keep in mind, if you put in the effort over the next year, you'll likely feel much better than you do now.

So, long story short: which would you choose?

 

[SteamaHorns]

I basically put myself through this plan and am going through it right now, though I guess minus the guarantee of a better life. The thing is that I'm mostly convinced that if I truly did commit myself to applying effort and persevering through my lack of desire and will everyday, then I really would be able to turn my life into something worth experiencing. I thought this plan would work given the initially intense fear-factor of promising to kill myself if I didn't achieve success, but I somehow managed to remain the way that I've always been despite the new motivation. I still get the fleeting hopeful thoughts and daydreams but they've become much less frequent and believable.

Honestly though, I'm sure this kind of plan has helped a lot of people and works to a degree. I've always had trouble with being sure of how I felt which extends towards whether or not I'd truly want to get my life together and be happy, so maybe I just need to come to terms with what kind of person I really am lol.

 

[BlackEyedDog]

5-7 months, even a year is not that long in the grand scheme as they say. i would at least try.

 

[Ww42]

I tried giving myself this option in 2023 after my attempt in 2022. I thought I could give myself a chance and it didn't work out. I'm currently an alcoholic in an even worse state than I would have been had I just died in 2022. My 2nd chance at death is coming soon in October

 

[Emeralds]

I would take the opportunity to try to get my life together. A year isn't a very long time when you look back at your life. It would be worth the effort especially when the only other option is death. What would I really have to lose? If it doesn't work out, the option of ctb will always be there later.

 

[ccake]

I would take the opportunity to try to get my life together. A year isn't a very long time when you look back at your life. It would be worth the effort especially when the only other option is death. What would I really have to lose? If it doesn't work out, the option of ctb will always be there later.

For me I would try, I just don't know if I'd have the energy to

 

[AbsurdAbyss]

CTB - recovery, to me, will never be worth its cost. i'd rather die now than live to regret it.

 

[SoulWhisperer]

If it's implied and guaranteed that shit will pull itself together just by "trying" (although I see it as hopeless due to how of fearful of society I am) and I'd get to at least leave peacefully alone with a basic job for the rest of my life then sure. But if the success would rely on my actual status there's probably no way I'd be able to pull it off so I'd choose the other option, too much hatred inside.

 

[Forever Sleep]

CTB. I'm 44. I've already put in the effort to change my life multiple times. There's no guarantee it will work. Why would it work this time when it hasn't worked in the past?

Plus, there are things I know I would need to try and tackle again- eg. social anxiety, a crushing lack of confidence around other people, which I have grown much more comfortable avoiding.

So, it's what I see as the third option for me. Tread water basically. Stay as I am. Take pleasure from not forcing myself to do things I find massively uncomfortable and frightening for the so-called 'greater good'. Until the point comes when I can CTB and hope I do have the guts to do it.

 

[Trav1989]

Probably just CTB, wife already left me for another guy so yeah, done with this.

 

[FuneralCry]

I just don't want to exist at all in my case, actually if it's up to me I'd choose to permanently erase my existence so it's like I never suffered at all, I just hope to never exist again, I find existing to be deeply undesirable, personally simply just existing causes me to suffer and I don't see any point and value to suffering in this existence. It terrifies me how a human can potentially exist for so long just to be tormented by old age, under no circumstances would I wish for that, I've never wished to exist and never would do, I just want peace instead, I just wish for nothingness, all I want is for death to take away my suffering and for me to never exist again, I find it a burden to exist.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'd CTB. The idea of my life getting better is incoherent as the main reason for my suffering and pain is life itself. I hate that I have to put effort in everything. I hate being a human. I hate how mentally exhausting being a human is. No amount of "recovery" can change that. For me, the only way to recover is by death as it's only death that can fix my issues permanently and make me be at peace

 

[uglyugly]

I would want to improve my life, no matter how long it too, rather than ctb. IF it was possible for things to get better - and that is a pretty big IF, I would most certainly put in the work and effort. I am concerned, though, that I am past that point - I can't fix the out of control inflation, lack of decent paying work, and subsequent poverty.

 

[hereornot]

I would like a better life but.i don't have 5 or 7 months to wait..

 

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

I been trying to put an effort ever since my life started to get worse. But it never got better. No matter how long, how much I tried to, there's always nothing good in a result.

Surely, I would choose to ctb right now and not even wait and try to make it better. It seems meaningless. Absolutely no fucking sense for me. If my life's like that and not fixable than I should just ctb and not wait any longer. I wish I could live in peace. But for me peace is only possible if I ctb.

 

[ccake]

I been trying to put an effort ever since my life started to get worse. But it never got better. No matter how long, how much I tried to, there's always nothing good in a result.

Surely, I would choose to ctb right now and not even wait and try to make it better. It seems meaningless. Absolutely no fucking sense for me. If my life's like that and not fixable than I should just ctb and not wait any longer. I wish I could live in peace. But for me peace is only possible if I ctb.

I feel you, honestly exactly how I'm feeling right now, I'm trying to push through but I have so much regret for so many different things and I can't even stand to look at myself anymore knowing how badly I've failed myself for these past couple of years. I'm considering ordering a rope soon, I'm too afraid to use firearm and I'm to tired to jump.

 

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

I feel you, honestly exactly how I'm feeling right now, I'm trying to push through but I have so much regret for so many different things and I can't even stand to look at myself anymore knowing how badly I've failed myself for these past couple of years. I'm considering ordering a rope soon, I'm too afraid to use firearm and I'm to tired to jump.

Yeah, I can't even look at myself after all I've done. I am awful and disgusting.

If my roommate wasn't an asshole than I would've drank my sn. But thanks to him, it's gone.

 

[ccake]

Yeah, I can't even look at myself after all I've done. I am awful and disgusting.

If my roommate wasn't an asshole than I would've drank my sn. But thanks to him, it's gone.

What'd they do to it?

 

[Sgrodolo]

I've been trying to for a long time but the conditions to make my life somewhat better simply aren't there

 

[huntermellow]

i do want a better life but it just doesn't seem possible for me. i did try to get better and start being 'normal' last year but i realised i'm really not good at living or being normal. every time i tried to be normal and be better i just ended up showing everyone how much of a freak i am because i can never truly mask myself. it's 9 months into the year and nothing has changed. everything has just gotten worse. idt i'd ever be able to put the 'effort' in to get better. therapy doesn't appeal to me. it's not like it will change anything that's happened and i don't want to learn to live with everything that has happened

 

[demitriusmigsysvotf]

What'd they do to it?

He threw it away

 

[Mars34]

Yes, but the problem is that a lot of things that would make my life better are things I can't control

 

[lifeisactualtorture]

If you were in a position where you wanted to CTB, but had the option to get your life somewhat together, would you take it?

The downside to this process is that it takes time, effort, and patience maybe around 5 to 7 months, or even up to a year. It will require energy and perseverance.

The upside, though, is that after going through it, you'll feel better not just slightly or significantly, but simply better than when you were considering CTB. In short, you'll be fairly happy, enjoy life more, and feel like you finally have a reason to live.

Or, you could choose to CTB and not have to worry about any of this just cease to exist in peace. But keep in mind, if you put in the effort over the next year, you'll likely feel much better than you do now.

So, long story short: which would you choose?

Ctb always. I didn't ruin my life, life ruined me.

 

[nihilistic_dragon]

No. Even if all my problems were suddenly magically resolved, life is still meaningless. I do not see why I should keep existing, whatever the circumstances are. Just not interested in being on this planet at all.

 

[iloveduster]

I'd definitely ctb. I just can't act delusional and pretend that I can fix all of my problems in a year. I don't have the energy or support to do this. My life is still getting worse and I can't undo the damage I've done to myself over the years.

 

[nobob]

For me it will take more than five years. Five years to get off medication. But if I could get my life back together in a year, I would prefer that over taking my own life.

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

Can't compare life decisions. There's also no point in doing so. But I think the fact that you're even asking means that you should continue on for another year.

 

[Plentiful_Despair]

There can't be a better life for me, it's physically impossible. I reject this entire existence, I'm bothered by the way human society and the universe itself works. The only real fix is to kill myself.

 

[reachi-seloam]

My problem is that I've peaked about as much as I can recently, but I still disagree with the concept of continuing life.

 

[-nobodyknows-]

I've tried "getting my life together" for nearly ten years now. I'm at the point now where I'm pretty much done